Right or wrong to feel a bit odd about this?

[EvilAntsAndMiasmas]

DP has told me that he's going away to another city (where we used to live) for the night "to help a friend out". He won't tell me who the friend is or what he will be doing there. I do know it's a moveable feast as he is working out with me when is an ok time for him to go (to fit round other arrangements). And he says he is keeping the secret for the friend's sake - but he will be able to tell me in a few weeks time.

Don't suspect anything fishy because I trust him, and because we are both away for work a lot, so no need to give me this (what would be totally rubbish) excuse if he was sneaking off with another woman. Plus he promises he will tell me when he can.

He won't tell me who the friend is, or even whether they are male or female.

How would you feel about it?

He is very loyal to his friends and the "would do anything to help anyone out" type.

He is getting annoyed with me being freaked out by this and thinks I should give him some "respect and space". Am not the jealous type AT ALL btw.

and he can't say if the "friend" is male or female becasue there is going to be a whole truckload of them and he couldn't read the information since it was in Chinese

It's so straight-forward when you give it a bit of thought

EvilAnts...have you told him we have him sussed ?

I think we should go into business. I've convinced myself !

[hgrin]

Wait and See. Guessing is futile. He's gonna have to reveal all anyway when he gets back.

PMSL at you two [hgrin]

You're like Miss Marple and delusional paranoioa all rolled into one.

oooh, have been thinking about this - is there a couple you are both friends with? Could it be the husband is leaving his wife, needs assistance to do so but is worried if you know about it, you'll feel duty bound by your friendship to the wife to tell her?

Yes, do you know yet?

Another MN mystery!

EvilAnts - if your DH has promised to keep a secret then good on him for sticking to that.

BUT, I would be angry that he agreed to such terms in the first place. I think the reasonable approach, when asked to keep something secret is to say yes, but I will need to tell EvilAnts (who is also trustworthy) the bare bones before I disappear off - if that's not OK, please don't involve me.

If I were in your shoes, I would have a chat with your DP about what you both consider communications in your relationship will work in future, otherwise you could be heading for some serious disagreements.

Oh hello - this has just popped up again. Latest is very boring I'm afraid - it's off for the time being at least. I strongly suspect it's some kind of break up situation - can't honestly think what else it could be.

Thanks Scroobius I am talking to him along those lines at the moment. I imagine if it's an older friend who doesn't know me well, then they might not quite have cottoned on that we've together for years now, but DP should make it clear that I need to know where he's going to be overnight