would you report it?

[wouldliketoknow]

i guess this is the best section for the question.
what do you think we should do as mumsnetters when someone tells us about a crime?
perhaps is our legal obligation to inform the police, specially when children are at risk or someone can't defend themselves, or munsnet must be a safe heaven, where people can talk without being reported, you know, when they wouldn't tell anyone.
what do you think? what would you like if it was you telling us something awful happened to you?

I think people are getting confused with offering advice about an abusive relationship they might be in, conflicting with the immediate need to get someone out of that situation there and then for fear of serious injury.

In the latter example, internet anonymity does not come first.

On this part if the forum most posts are in some form. The kids being around an addict or a parent who shouts, name calls, assaults in front of the kids.

It's all child abuse in it's different forms so who makes the call on what level is severe enough for action.

I think there are people on here who for their own reasons are looking for a bit of Internet action they can get involved with before understanding the practicalities and the fact it will drive other women away. People need to take a step back and not interfere no one on here has that right even if they think the situation is real. It's all a bit hysterical for me now in this thread. It's good to see so many want to help but if I am honest some are not thinking of the real life implications in a balanced manner.

PP - (Im still here but bed is calling ) to me, any other serious situation (not child abuse) then I agree with you. I would offer support, help, numbers to call, suggestions of ways forward etc, I would not feel the need to inform any authorities (disclaimer below)

With abuse of children (which is in the thread this thread is about) it is different because they (the dc) cannot act for themselves.

disclaimer - if someone was posting about suicide, as well as posting the samaritans number i would flag to mn in case they hadn't seen it so they could follow up if they had further details, or again, if someone was saying they were in immediate harm (ie someone breaking down their door) I would again flag to mn to see if they had an address to send police to.

Emmy how condescending and inaccurate.

I'm off to bed now. Will catch up tomorrow.

'no one on here has that right (to interfere) even if they think the situation is real'

I totally disagree with this statement and think it is very strange. Of course people have the right to interfere if they think children are being abused. Do you advocate not interfering in rl too?

Scurry - exactly. will join you. not literally you understand

see you in morning.

scurryfunge your approach is wholy ignorant I am afraid. At best well intentioned whilst utterly misguided.

What's so difficult about the thread under discussion here is that it's difficult to reconcile the OP's right to anonymity with the sense of obligation we all feel to protect her DCs. I just had a look on the Samaritans and Child Lines' websites for their own codes of practice for dealing with these types of situations. As you'll see from the bits I've cut and pasted below, the same tension between adult privacy and the need for child advocacy is present.

Samaritans:
What is the information used for?
Samaritans only use a caller?s information to provide that caller with emotional support.

All information relating to a caller is confidential to Samaritans unless:
We have informed consent from the caller to pass on information
We call an ambulance because a caller appears to be incapable of making rational decisions for him or herself
We receive a court order requiring us to divulge information
We are passed information about acts of terrorism or bomb warnings
A caller attacks or threatens volunteers
A caller deliberately prevents the service from being delivered to other callers
Samaritans maintain confidentiality even after the death of a caller.

Child Line:
You say you might need to tell someone if you?re very worried about me or someone else. What does this mean?

You can talk to ChildLine about anything that is important to you, no matter how big or small it might seem. There are some things that we think are too big to keep between you and ChildLine, and we will talk to you about whether other people need to know. what?s happening.

We may want to tell someone else what is happening if:

We think your life or someone else?s life is in danger
You've told us that someone is hurting you, who might be hurting other people too - like a teacher who works with other children
You?ve told us that you have been hurting another person which makes us worried about their safety.

I think the one concession we could make would be to say that if anyone here feels genuinely compelled to report the anecdotal abuse of a child as posted on here, then the reporter should inform the OP of their intention to do it first - as the victim's consent for someone to act on their behalf seems to be the common factor in taking these things down more official routes.

A chat room is not the same as a counselling or support service offered professionally. There is no place for the type of policy that such organisations have because this is not a professional institution in the sense that discussion and content of the chat areas is open to all.

SOme of you might also like to consider those threads from people who have been wrongly reported to SS, their fear and distress, the distress caused to the DC etc and the lasting damage done to those families. Not all social workers are particularly sensitive or even very good at their jobs, and that percentage who are basically power-mad bullies would just love to be able to go bashing into peope's homes saying 'Someone reported you on the Internet, confess all now or you'll go to prison'. Not to mention the likelihood of the Forces of Righteousness being sent to the wrong fecking address...

Fair point. I was just trying to give those who would report anecdotal crimes to the police some point of reference.

Personally I come down on the side of the argument that says what goes on mumsnet stays on mumsnet.

Oops, x-posted. My post above was meant for hobgoblin, but agree to some extent with SGB too.

The Samaritans and Childline are both organisations. Mumsnet comprises individuals who read the forum and may or may not have reported a thread. We can debate it, but it takes only one person (who may be in a minority) to be concerned and to take action. It doesn't matter what the official policy of Mumsnet is really, or what the majority of posters think.

And perhaps it is better that way, because if someone were to report a thread, no-one would be any the wiser, and those women who need help won't be put off from posting.

I don't really know where I stand, though, but I do hope the OP of the thread in question does take action herself.

yes, sorry madonna i realised that was why you posted and i think it was a good post. I was following on from your addition, having read the policies with interest (had read samaritans one before) and meant to add that on reflection of your post i feel that confirms the difference between those organisations and mnet.

where do you think you stand legally if you know and don't report it?

There is no obligation to report anything. If someone wants to take action as they feel someone's life is at immediate risk, then that is what will happen.

hobbgoblin, I'm afraid I don't understand why you say my post is ignorant. No one is pretending that MN serves the same function as The Samaritans. Most sites operate a common sense approach.

WLTK-you don't stand anywhere, no action would be taken against a person on here who knew or a neighbour who knew(and had absolutely no other involvement) in RL.