Possible Teenage Pregnancy

[alilhoyle33]

Hi

I have 5 kids which range from 2 to 14, my 14 year old is from a previous relationship and up until earlier this year she was living with my ex. He is an alcoholic but he had supposedly got better but recently he had gone backwards so he was spending all his money in the pub and was never at home. So my daughter was at home on her own. I didn't know this until I got a phone call from my social worker saying a colleague of hers had a family one her caseload and she though the daughter was related to me. I went to meet her one day at our church as I thought it would be a good meeting point as it was relatively neutral.

I've met her quite a few times over the last few months and over the last month she's been spending the weekends with us, she's met my 4 other children and my husband. The thing is since she's started coming to see us over the weekends she's been very sleepy, she's complained offeeling sick and that she constantly needs the bathroom. I suspect that she's sexually active and possibly become pregnant but I'm not sure how to approach it especially as i've only just met up again.

Alison

She HAS made space.

im not going to look at this thread anymore, i am quite calm, just feel very frustrated that a mother can sound so detached and yes, cold, towards a child of 14 who has been left with an alcoholic abuser, about to have a baby and has no real home!

I know what you mean jwn, but you cant really tell anything from posting style. Some people just aren't expressive in that way.
OP does seem to be doing the correct things.

I'm sorry i come across as being detached i really do feel for her maybe i just do express it very well. Her social worker arranged for her to see a GP at the practice for later on this afternoon we are all concerned about how far gone she is. I just i was better at expressing it.

What time is your DD's apointment ?

It's at 5.50pm

I feel so sad for this poor child .
She must be so confused .

This girl doesn't have to make an immediate decision about adoption - though if she is considering abortion it is imperative to find out how advanced her pregnancy is (TBH almost certainly too late for an abortion given that you appear to have been dicking around for a month doing nothing and she must have been several weeks PG before you noticed anything).
Is there anyone this chld can trust and properly confide in? The boyfriend, or boyfriend's family maybe? Because (as I said I get the impression that there are some other major factors you are not able to reveal) I don't think you are able to react to her like a mother generally would, probably due to circumstances, but what she needs most of all is someone she can really trust - and she probably doesn't feel you can trust her becaue in her eyes at least, you have abaondoned her before and may do so again.

Second SolidGoldBrass's post.

What came of the GP apt ?

I am sorry, I am confused, in your OP you said your daughter had met all your other children, in a further mesage you said she hadn' met the 2yo. Please make room and take her in she is your daughter you gave birth to her, Help her.

She saw the doctor this afternoon she's 16 weeks pregnant and she's met all of my kids she picked up my youngest yesterday and gave her a cuddle. She's going to stay here with me, my dh plus her brothers and sister.

Sounds liuke a good outcome. Hope you make a go of it.

So what was the outcome of the talk with the social worker ?

I think what people are overlooking here, is that 9 years ago, a court awarded custody to the OPs ex, rather than her...there must have been some logic behind this.

Also the OP currently has a SW working with her family, so will obviously isn't sailing through life herself, for what ever reason.

I really hope things work out for you all, alilhoyle33. Are you ina rented house? Is there any chance of your family moving to a larger house to accommodate you daughter and her baby?