Does anyone think that having an affare should be a crime?

[Wanttofly]

It used to be and still is in many countries.

If you stand up and say vows and then lie to the other person and have sex with someone else why is it ok?

The affare hurts the other person more than someone steeling their stuff or taking a car and that is a crime.

So why is it not a crime to break up a family, to make children grow up with only one pereant?

When did it become ok to have an affare?

Sorry for spelling i'm dyslexic

It's not about adultery being the worst thing that can happen in a marriage in my view- it's just that most people are stupid.
They know that adultery can be used in a court to dissolve their marriage yet they still say that they had no idea that they were supposed to be faithful! How stupid is that?!

"Oh but I didn't sign up for fidelity".
Right.

It's not about morality- it's about people actually doing what they say in life.
If they can't see themselves as faithful, then they should either:
a, NOT marry.
b, Agree that faithfulness in a sexual sense will not be part of their marriages.

I think that having an affair is a really crappy thing to do (I'm thinking of deceitful affairs here, if a couple have agreed it's OK, and they are both totally happy with that, then that's another matter, although I suspect unusual). However marriages are a fairly unusual form of contract, lasting many many years with no renegotiation. It's perfectly possible that many of those who go on to have affairs had absolutely no idea that they were even capable of doing so when they made their marriage vows many years before. Lots of affairs are responses to difficulties within marriage, where it is easier to find a new person to listen and support you than to address why your relationship is struggling and to at least attempt to fix it (f course the affair is likely to totally destroy whatever love is left, but I don't think that most people who have affairs are thinking very straight).

I don't agree with affairs.Although I will admit to having one and although others on here have said the consequences for having an affair are minor at the moment.I don't agree.After my Affair my H psychologically,physically and sexually abused me.In the end I had to seek help.I will say tho prior to my affair H was already abusive just not to the same extreme.Anyway I chose not to press charges for the abuse.Stood by him.Thought we could make things work.I will never cheat again.Now I discover he has slept with nearly 20 women in a year as payback.And as I said before I will never cheat again regardless.I don't think affairs should be a crime as people both the betrayed and betrayer suffer enough and so do the children.

Just to liven up the debate even more i think affairs should be a crime, i think ppl who commit affairs should be punished, id kill my H if he did that.
Ppl always jump to criticise the Middle East (and no im not middle eastern). The bottom line is that the majority of cultures around the world dont approve of affairs, be it middle eastern, or shock horror even westrn, so in this case it would make sense to put some sort of punishment on having an affair. Very interesting question!! Im bracing myself for everybodies disgusted comments...(wink)

My friend is tearing herself apart trying to save her marrage. Her husband is emotionaly abusing her. She will cry and beg him to stop seeing OW and she does everything she can to make him happy but he stil goes back to OW. My friend is so in love with this man that its been going on for years now. He will say one thing to stay in his bed and with his kids then the next thing is going to see OW. The their childern know what is going on and are used in this ugly game he is playing. Its unfair and mean and nothing i can say or do can change it. If i point out whats going on she will defened him!

Its nuts.

I just think some times with people like him they should lock him away and throw away the key.

I will shut up now and walk away

of course it shouldn't.

It is morally corrupt but it can never be illegal. Which party would be prosecuted? how much evidence would be required? what sort of punishment would there be?

silly idea

Gosh no.

In fact I think the person who had the affair should be commended for being honest with themselves about how unhappy they are.

Love happens. You can't stop it. Love is a primordial force. It's sitting quietly in the cradle of evolution.

You can never ringfence/stop/prevent love.

Right. So that's the love-shite dealt with.

Moving on:
Scrap marriage. It's a load of HorseShit designed to entrap lovers (M/F) into poverty and dependency.

Remain single. Shag about. Have kids. Get as much maintenance/state help as you need to keep evolution going .

It's called living honestly instead of through the warped paradigm that is 'marriage'or 'monogamous relationships'

Get your man
Get some dick.
Get some kids if you want/live in a sunnier healthier clime
Get money from him.

Leave. Start it all over again.

Why the feck not?? You only live once and 'happily married for years and years' only happens on Radio 2.

It is a male's invention.