Archers thread #159: Sad news as 2023 draws to a close - RIP Ian Pepperell (Roy Tucker). Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd like more of Gagriculture, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

We start this thread with the very sad news that Ian Pepperell, who played Roy Tucker from 1995 without a break, has died at the age of 53. There's a lovely tribute to him in this article from Jeremy Howe, the current Editor. https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2023/dec/23/the-archers-actor-ian-pepperell-dies-aged-53-roy-archer-eastenders

Graham Blockey, who played Robert Snell, died just over a year ago, also far too young (66). https://www.getsurrey.co.uk/news/surrey-news/much-loved-surrey-gp-archers-25524449 As yet, Robert survives in Ambridge.

I do hope they don't re-cast Robert, but it might work for Roy, I suppose, after a suitable interval. They've re-cast Tony, Tom, Kate, Pip, Clarrie and Emma, mostly successfully. I still wish Tom and Pip hadn't been re-cast. New Tom is a good actor but so was Old Tom.

Meanwhile, several very elderly members of the cast survive, and long may that continue, although not necessarily on air. I think most of us would say that the time has come for Jill to become a silent character, following the precedent of Peggy and Christine.

So! Christmas next week - will it be the best Christmas ever at either Brookfield or The Stables, or both? Then it's 2024. What does the New Year hold for The Archers? Over to you!

I thought it must be https://www.poetry-archive.com/b/lord_lucky.html Hilaire Belloc! Thanks, @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime , for bringing that to our attention

wrt the rain, I have been wondering if this is not in fact a topical insert (as it keeps getting mentioned, and they wouldn't have known about this 6 weeks ago) but a foreshadowing of another Flood.
The weather in Ambridge is always in some strange meteorological bubble.

It's one of the ones I know by heart, so the punctuation might be a bit all-over-the-place...

There is also Lord Hippo and his Sire, the Earl of Potomus:

"Come! Come! Come! Come! Don't look so glum!
Trust your Papa and name the sum.
WHAT? Fifteen hundred thousand? Hum!
However ... stiffen up, you wreck;
Boys will be boys — so here's the cheque!"

and of course George (who played with a dangerous toy and suffered a catastrophe of considerable dimensions), which I learned because my father's name was George.

The only ones of Belloc's I got near to remembering completely was

"Matilda told such dreadful lies
it made one gasp and stretch ones eyes...
... and therefore when her Aunt returned, Matilda
and the house were burned"

and the closing lines of Jim (who ran away from his nurse and was eaten by a lion)
"'always keep-a hold of nurse - for fear of finding something worse!".

I used to read Jim to my DC with suitable mime
"With open Jaws, a lion sprang,
And hungrily began to eat
The Boy: beginning at his feet.
Now, just imagine how it feels
When first your toes and then your heels,
And then by gradual degrees,
Your shins and ankles, calves and knees,
Are slowly eaten, bit by bit.
No wonder Jim detested it!"
DC weren't too keen either

You know, in the "Awright" days, I'd have been more than happy for Henwee to share Jim's fate, but now I'm rather glad he didn't. There's a moral in that somewhere, something to do with sticking with unbearable characters because they might eventually turn out right. Joy, for example.

Peggy's moved into the Laurels and Kate's living with Brian - but where has Hilda the cat gone?

This is the sort of thing that my brain decides to think about in the early hours instead of sleeping...

Apparently Hilda has accompanied her slave to the Old People’s Home For The Exceedingly Wealthy. They were talking about it the other day. I forget who said what, but there was appropriate surprise and awe.

From memory so there might be some mistakes:
The chief defect of Henry King
Was chewing little bits of string.
One day he swallowed some which tied
Itself in ugly knots inside.
Physicians of the utmost fame
Were called and to his bedside came.
They muttered as they took their fees
There is no cure for this disease.

I've always loved HB. Glad to meet other fans.

There's one about Lord Finchley who tried to mend the electric light and killed himself which ends:

"It is the duty of the wealthy man to give employment to the artisan.' I sometimes think of this when I pay someone to do something I could possibly do myself. Not that I'm wealthy (or a man).

This thread has taken a strange turn…

i think the strange turn is unfortunately better than the show we ostensibly talk about. and at the risk of stoking regulars' ire can i ask if anyone knows what the poem is called about a very naughty boy "who walked through doors marked 'no admittance'" and died because "instead of drinking h2o drank h2so4 instead"

Odgen Nash maybe?

Back to TA - any indications that it's worth listening to today?

The Boy who laughed at Santa Claus

In Baltimore there lived a boy.
He wasn't anybody's joy.
Although his name was Jabez Dawes,
His character was full of flaws.

In school he never led his classes,
He hid old ladies' reading glasses,
His mouth was open when he chewed,
And elbows to the table glued.
He stole the milk of hungry kittens,
And walked through doors marked NO ADMITTANCE.
He said he acted thus because
There wasn't any Santa Claus.

Another trick that tickled Jabez
Was crying 'Boo' at little babies.
He brushed his teeth, they said in town,
Sideways instead of up and down.
Yet people pardoned every sin,
And viewed his antics with a grin,
Till they were told by Jabez Dawes,
'There isn't any Santa Claus!'

Deploring how he did behave,
His parents swiftly sought their grave.
They hurried through the portals pearly,
And Jabez left the funeral early.

Like whooping cough, from child to child,
He sped to spread the rumor wild:
'Sure as my name is Jabez Dawes
There isn't any Santa Claus!'
Slunk like a weasel of a marten
Through nursery and kindergarten,
Whispering low to every tot,
'There isn't any, no there's not!'

The children wept all Christmas eve
And Jabez chortled up his sleeve.
No infant dared hang up his stocking
For fear of Jabez' ribald mocking.

He sprawled on his untidy bed,
Fresh malice dancing in his head,
When presently with scalp-a-tingling,
Jabez heard a distant jingling;
He heard the crunch of sleigh and hoof
Crisply alighting on the roof.
What good to rise and bar the door?
A shower of soot was on the floor.

What was beheld by Jabez Dawes?
The fireplace full of Santa Claus!
Then Jabez fell upon his knees
With cries of 'Don't,' and 'Pretty Please.'
He howled, 'I don't know where you read it,
But anyhow, I never said it!'
'Jabez' replied the angry saint,
'It isn't I, it's you that ain't.
Although there is a Santa Claus,
There isn't any Jabez Dawes!'

Said Jabez then with impudent vim,
'Oh, yes there is, and I am him!
Your magic don't scare me, it doesn't'
And suddenly he found he wasn't!
From grimy feet to grimy locks,
Jabez became a Jack-in-the-box,
An ugly toy with springs unsprung,
Forever sticking out his tongue.

The neighbors heard his mournful squeal;
They searched for him, but not with zeal.
No trace was found of Jabez Dawes,
Which led to thunderous applause,
And people drank a loving cup
And went and hung their stockings up.

All you who sneer at Santa Claus,
Beware the fate of Jabez Dawes,
The saucy boy who mocked the saint.
Donner and Blitzen licked off his paint.
Ogden Nash

The H2S04 instead of H20 must he a different poem.

Once again, the sort of real life issue that might be interestingly explored within the environs of Ambridge …

thanks @CaptainMyCaptain deffo a different one. He was a thoroughly nasty boy.

It was the exchange between Lilian and Denise which got Denise ticked off by Alistair (never any question of how his name might be spelled now!)

I have to say, the turn the thread has taken is a lot more fun than discussing the programme at the moment! Another poem about a naughty child from more robust times.

I work with someone named Alistair. I feel completely thrown by the AliSTARE pronunciation, it's driving me nuts (I've now heard it pronounced the wrong way so many times that it's starting to creep into my mind every time I read his name). I'm hoping that Alistair might correct Denise in a fit of irritation during one of their bickering sessions "will you PLEASE learn how to pronounce my name properly, Denise".

Denise and Alis-stare seem to be back on track. The banter at the dance class was pretty excruciating- no wonder Gnasher decided to excuse herself!

Gnasher going over to Paul also seemed to be the catalyst that finally opened his eyes too. I wonder if he'll say anything.

Johnny was a chemists son
But Johnny is no more
What he thought was H2O was H2SO4

Yes please Helen!!!

I second that!

Thinking of Lower Loxley and what Oliver called "the stately home experience", they could raise their game. I'm thinking Saltburn... I can see it all now. Brad could be enticed I think; clever lad, interested in improving his body, just ripe for prancing through the rooms in the buff. He just needs the motivation seeing as he's a good boy. Now who could annoy him - Lily for a start.

I didn't know that one, but I know the quote - it was one of Dad’s favourites.

Along with
”John had a very ancient car, it went not fast, it went not far
and on one day as I recall, it did not even go at all” from a poem ending
“… a witch in time saves the seven forty nine”

Can I just say, I love the term Ding Dong, I think we need to have a campaign to get it used more often. Bun Fight will have to be put into second place.

Also, I love the English language for the fact that Ding Dong can be an argument, or it can be Ding Dong like ‘saucy!’

instead of drinking h2o drank h2so4 instead On a similar theme

Johnny, finding life a chore, drank some H2S04.
Johnny’s father, an MD, gave him CaCO3
Now he’s neutralised, it’s true, but he’s full of CO2

Holmyard, popular school chemistry book in the 1930s.

Also, I suppose we need the odd ding dong to keep the thread moving given the storylines are so dire at the moment.

Find it hard to believe that the vets would only have just started having to sell stuff. But the food bit is really not part of that I would think, that’s just a standard thing and has been for years. Some foods are prescribed. A large number of the bigger vets are actually owned by the same companies (for example Mars!) that make the prescription foods. So the big sell requirement would be even more likely at one of those. So Denise would be best off staying where she is, selling the odd sparkly collar.