Archers thread #157: How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless clan! Discuss The Grundys here. Bicker about The Archers as well if you like.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @OverArmour for the idea of making it clear in the title many of us are inveterate bickerers!

Now over to you, as we are about to eat and I won't hear tonight's offering till later ....

Well, she was hammered the night she ran over Mike.

That was a long time ago; more than fifteen years. Back then she didn't spend quite so much time telling anyone who was standing still near her that she could cope, she was coping, she was in control.

Well Miles wasn’t so bad was he? He saw a different Rob and it’s not always easy to accept the truth. love Helen telling him to see a therapist - like she would take that advice!! Pretty predictable she was going to chuck the ring.

Denise being mother of the house making sure they have paracetamol and decent coffee is a bit ick somehow. And Josh calling his family lightweights when he couldn’t manage to make it to work. What’s with the selfish and unaware genes being so dominant in the archers?

how deluded is Paul that he hasn’t figured out his mum has left his dad!!

how deluded is Paul that he hasn’t figured out his mum has left his dad!! Well, I hadn’t worked it out. But that explains why josh and lily? are fed up with her - to engineer a conversation between Paul and his Mum for her to drop the bombshell. So the Alistair story line is ticking along. But does she have a job lined up? Since she’s stepped aside for Paul?

Lucky for Helen that Miles wanted a walk. It would have been more difficult to stage a dramatic lob on her doorstep.

Bruisername
how deluded is Paul that he hasn’t figured out his mum has left his dad!!

We don't actually know that yet. Nor why Paul and Denise have different surnames; is the man she is with at the moment actually his father, or is he a stepfather?

Well done Helen. I'm imagining over arm with a bit of top-spin.

Of course it would have made more sense in the long game way for Rob to have willed it to Jack, then Helen couldn't chuck it..

Denise really doesn't sound like a woman who's just left her husband and is living with his(?) child ?

Did Brian say his children had got him a vintage Porsche?

A vintage watch I think

I heard vintage watch.

Watch not Porsche. I think there would have been more discussion about a Porshe and it wouldn't be very practical on country lanes.

I was quite surprised Brian liked his vintage watch. IME, watches are very personal and would be hard to choose as a present - especially for someone like Brian who is probably quite particular. Also, he is a farmer so surely needs a practical, rather than fancy, watch. Also, by the age of 80, I would have thought he would have sourced a watch that suits him and which he won’t want to change….

Not that I have given it much thought…

The ring fling was superb. But I really do hope it bookends the whole thing for a while. Helen has suffered and had her drama and should settle for that now.

And where were her children at Brine's party? They do seem to be optional appendages

What do you get the 80-year-old man who has everything, though? Brian knows the form. He will have said he loved it even if he was privately wondering how long he can leave it till putting it on Ebay. I thought a penknife was an odd choice of present, and who tells the person who answers the door what the present is before the recipient has opened it?

Didn't Brian take cooking lessons after Jennifer's death? I wonder if he met Natalia there.

Helen has an unending supply of babysitters. Kirsty, Joy, her parents, conceivably Tom and Natasha at times. I've lost track of how old the Button sisters are - possibly too old to be doing babysitting for pocket money, but there must be other local teenagers who would do it. Mia?

Forgot to say above how much I relished Adam fretting about Brian leaving his money to a new woman instead of to his grasping brood of children and stepchildren. I hope he says as much to Brian himself in a week with a really good scriptwriter, as I'd pay good money to hear Charles Collingwood tear him off a strip and then hotfoot it to a solicitor to make a new will.

Kirsty is a good shout as Helen’s babysitter, as she and Brian have clashed in the past, no love lost there at all.

I was trying to remember last night whether Brine now lives in the house where Rob lived with Jess? If so, Adam’s comment to Helen “have you tried the salmon?” would be a clever touch.

Did you go to the same school I did? The food was pretty terrible, but cheesy mash was one of the brighter spots.

Yes! Another thing I noticed but then forgot about it. Did Rob live in Blossom Hill Cottage with Jess before she finally left him? If so, that's where he showed his true colours on the occasion she tried cooking a whole salmon, using Jennifer's instructions, for a party there. I can't remember what his issue was with it, but he was absolutely vile, in the way he so often was with Helen later.

Good shout on meeting Natalia at cooking lessons

a vintage watch doesn’t have to be impractical.

the subtlety of the salmon comment is totally out of kilter with the bludgeoning signposting of the rest of the scriptwriting at the moment!!

If it was Kirsty babysitting then she is a veritable saint for having forgiven Helen her thoughtless comments about being childless.

I stopped wearing a watch when I retired. I can't imagine why he needs one at his age.

I’m retired and quite often need to know the time, to get to appointments, clubs, catch buses to where I’m going. Not that I can imagine Brian catching a bus (I do all the time since I got my bus pass). I probably need a watch more now that I’m not glued to a computer screen or in a lecture theatre with a clock. I use my phone, mostly but that’s because I can’t wear a watch. Brian has nice manners and would have shown gratitude for his children’s thoughtful gift, even if he didn’t like it.

Item of jewellery. Status symbol. I have a vague idea that Rolexes might be easy to sell for cash in extremis.

My DH is a total watch fiend. Has tens of them, and adores them. I already know the one I am buying him for a Big Birthday next year! It's just some people's thing and I can definitely imagine Brine liking the conspicuous consumption element.