Archers thread #151: A Fête worse than death or a reverse ferret? Helen’s got the Borsetshire Blues, Tom’s talking shiitake, George is a rotten apple. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think Helen and Tom would do well on Dragons' Den, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @OverArmour for various title ideas! I would have liked to incorporate the suggestion from @Fleetress, which was

‘Do do one Ron, Ron, do do one Ron’

(Rob is Ron for many on this thread now)

Possibly a bit obscure for newer posters, though!

Anyway: we got through that last thread in no time at all. Combined effect of Rob and George, I suspect. I wonder if Rob will have made it to Ambridge by the time we need a new thread. I'm still waiting for Pat's shotgun to feature. That can't have been mentioned for the first time ever for no reason at all.

Over to you!

Coo … That was vicious.

Another job bites the dust, surely?

(Yes, @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime, that and also IIRC Alistair being a bit worried, when he and Shula were divorcing, that the entire clan might boycott his services. Was it David who reassured him? I have a vague idea that he has a wider client base since the Lovell James thing.)

All the tea-room. Stella and Pip were among those present.

@MereDintofPandiculation , in front of all the tearoom.

Definitely Helen's. I'm afraid that George is the equivalent of a grim tissue. You know what I mean.

This is probably a stupid question: where can I find a synopsis of the episodes? Some of them I do not want to listen to - I find the Rob stuff too miserable - but I want to know what happened. This thread helps but doesn’t give every detail of course.

George did well there, off the back foot. ‘See Mad Helen froth and gibber.’ Emmur will be out for Archer blood, again. What’s not to like?

https://ambridgereporter.org.uk/synopses/

Tonight's is not likely to go up until tomorrow, on recent form.

Haven't heard tonight's yet. Sounds like I should catch up toot sweet. However, synopses can be found here, I think, once episodes have been broadcast. These are the official ones. There's also the Ambridge Reporter, which is unofficial, but more detailed. https://www.ambridgereporter.org.uk/synopses/

Or there is the BBC to tell you what you are supposed to have heard: they are on the "Available Now" page of the Archers Website.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006qpgr/episodes/player

Splendid!

Stella and Pip together are rather sweet. I feel I want to wipe my mouth out with soap now. Or my finger tips.

And Joy. I mean reliably non- malicious , non- snide and non- judgemental.

True. After about ten minutes of her going on and on you might have to throw a green cloth over her head and run for it, but she means no harm.

What was Helen going on about at the end? I mean, does she really think everyone doesn't already know all about Rob? Or is it just his being in the country that she is trying to keep secret, and if so why? I would have thought it would make a whole lot more sense to make sure the whole village knew he was prowling around, and also that she had the non-mol, so that if anyone saw him they would call the cops and he wouldn't be able corner her or either of her sons on their own.

you might have to throw a green cloth over her head and run for it

May we pull the corners round her neck really tightly before legging it? ( asking for a friend, not)

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime I think that Helen needs to feel she's in control of everything - as deeply insecure people sometimes are. To tell anyone beyond her immediate family and best mate Kirsty - about her feelings of vulnerability re:Rob is something she would never consider. All the more shock to her then when she is confronted with the reality that everyone, including George, knows about it all.

I'm not sure that Emma will take that line. She couldn't stand Ron, after all, and will probably be even less impressed that George did nothing to stop Henry even after she had told him what a nasty piece of work Ron was. I suspect he'll be accusing her of being a slag again.

What, we’re not going to have the treat of Helen and Emmur wrestling in a vat of creamed corn/slurry? Shame, really.

God's teeth! Wash your mind out....

Yes, she cut him off pretty definitely when he made that comment about Helen being batshit. It wasn't in the voice of a fond mother.

Goodness me. Poor Mr Gasp had that inflicted on him and looked a bit shellshocked.

Plenty of material for the new thread we're going to need pretty soon ...

Team George tonight. He’s got you pegged, Helen.

But WHAT IS GEORGE GOING TO DO WITH THE VIDEO?!?

Thank you @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime and @Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g, much appreciated