💥 Archers thread #119: Has the Bull reopened? Will Ambridge pull through? We’ve all dozed off and haven't a clue. Moan about the monologues here!

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think we should have monologues all the time from now on, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please. We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3853783--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-5-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to PPE on the last thread for the title suggestion, which I tweaked a bit.

As for the current state of affairs: here's how it could have been done. www.youtube.com/channel/UCvRSVdfQWAjNhNu1AtABYjw Nigel Pargetter returns, albeit in spectral form. I loved these.

I don't love the current set up. Very, very hit and miss for me - but I am too much of an addict to give it up. Looking for a silver lining, maybe the rather clunky trot through the Aldridge family tree last night was helpful to newer listeners. It is rather convoluted. In 12.5 minutes they managed to explain that Adam and Debbie are Jennifer's children by different fathers, that Debbie's father Roger Travers-Macy adopted Adam, that after he and Jenny divorced she married Brian and that he (secretly) loves Adam and not nearly so secretly adores Debbie. I don't think they explicitly stated that Kate and Alice are Brian's children with Jenny, but they did manage to squeeze in a mention of Siobhan and Ruairi, and explain that Xander is Adam's son by a surrogate and has no genetic connection to either Brian or Xander's other father Ian. Phew!

There must be other ways to get rid of Harrison (I agree the creepiness - I get shudders when I recall his "wooing" of Fallon, but I can't stand over-dramatic soapy story lines.

Haven't listened for ages - had hoped the monologues had stopped..........
It can't be that difficult to do remote recording. DCs school have done it for various things including choirs!

Remote recording isn't that difficult; The Archers has been doing it since April. What the Powers That Be decided, though, was that the BBC technicians are not capable of splicing pre-recorded sound from two or three different locations. So they told them not to try. Hence the moanalogues.

I don't understand the scratch card storyline. You spend £50 on scratch cards but don't bother to check out whether getting four of the same symbol wins a prize? Seriously?

Indeed Pobble.

As BlueCowWonders suggested, the problem seems to be that they built a perfect character in Johnny, found the perfect actor - but, now that he's there, they just don't have any real story for him. I'm sure they'd rather just keep him "in waiting" until they do - but in the meantime they're forced to make up nonsense in order to remind us of his existence. The awful thing is the otherwise wonderful actor can't disguise the times he finds the script unconvincing.

I don't understand the scratch card storyline.
I don't understand how come Jonneh couldn't tell the difference between a flower and a clover leaf. Shall we blame the artist rather than the farmer.

And now we have Harrison Burns not apparently knowing that a scratch-card is not valid if it is claimed on behalf of a two-year-old. And anyway why would he "return" to a child that age a scratch-card which is very unlikely indeed to have belonged to her?

The BBC synopsis says that while he is looking in his wallet "he finds a scratch-card that Daisy has found", which is equally nonsensical for different reasons: one, that Johnny would have been scattering potentially-valuable scratch-cards as a hen scatters feathers, and two, that when Daisy found it nobody bothered to try to work out who it belonged to.

Scratchcard presumably blew away on the wind when Johnnie started emptying the bin outside his house. Daisy found it. The bit I find unbelievable is that Harrison put it in his wallet. Why not in the bin?

Good to hear that Timotei is now in custody, though. I wonder if he can be imprisoned for his assorted misdemeanours.

While actively looking for a scratch-card, Johnny threw one to the wind and didn't go after it. O.... kay ...

He's even dimmer than I thought.

Wondered if anyone else thinks Alice's escalated drinking seems to be somewhat unrealistic as it's minus any slurring of words? She sounds the same whether sober or not. I realise they are probably trying to show how people can slowly fall into alcohol dependency but surely it's not as seamless as this. There would be warnings along the way. Presumably they are delaying the inevitable fallout and confrontations with Chris, for dramatic purposes?

@WeWantSweet

Wondered if anyone else thinks Alice's escalated drinking seems to be somewhat unrealistic as it's minus any slurring of words? She sounds the same whether sober or not. I realise they are probably trying to show how people can slowly fall into alcohol dependency but surely it's not as seamless as this. There would be warnings along the way. Presumably they are delaying the inevitable fallout and confrontations with Chris, for dramatic purposes?

Well, most of the time she is talking inside her own head. I noticed the other day that she was cleaning her teeth- you could even hear the brush- but her words were crystal clear. That’s because it was the thoughts being voiced. Maybe the same principle applies to drunken slurring- only happens if you are actually talking?

Maybe the same principle applies to drunken slurring- only happens if you are actually talking?Probably. I'm always the epitome of eloquence when I've had a few

@CheetasOnFajitas
"Well, most of the time she is talking inside her own head".

Feel a berk now. In my defence, I thought they might be talking out loud to themselves.. (Scuttles away in embarrassment)

I've always thought that internal drunken thought (well, internal thought at all, really) would be more like James Joyce's Ulysses then the grammatical reasoned stuff we are getting from all the Archers characters -- ie it would be incomprehensible to most people, certainly if you can't re-read it a couple of times to try to work out what it means.

Also, aren't men meant to think about having sex about four times an hour, and women twice an hour? So if this stuff is the thoughts of the characters, sex ought to come into it at least sometimes, and not sanitised "I want to spend some time with my wife" thought either.

Yes AQATT. I don't know about anyone else but I don't actually think in words - they're thoughts.

Haven't listened for ages - had hoped the monologues had stopped..........

I still usually hear it but only because I tend to have R4 on at that time. I would struggle to tell you most of the content without relistening and find it tedious whinging most of the time.

However good to know the personality change fairy hasn't been made redundant and is still gainfully employed transforming Johnny.

Been away for a week and have just caught up. But it seems I didn’t actually miss anything anyway.
When exactly are we getting actual conversations? And will this actually mean some of the storylines can actually progress?

Moanologues is the right term.

I thought Alice wasd slurring but in a fairly realisic way.

realistic hic!

I miss the real Archers. The moanalogues are just... well uninteresting to me.

I've listened for decades and frankly, I'm worried. Is the real Archers ever coming back? If so, when?

Whhhy are weeee waiting, whyhhy are we waiting...

It's no good. Usually I have the omnibus burbling away in the background - but I just cannot listen to Harrison's dull voice or mangled enunciation. Have switched off.

World ends.

So did Jonny find the ticket or not? I can't be bothered to listen again.

These people are very proud. In their culture -

Dying here.

They didn't tell us whether Johnny found the ticket. I think maybe we are meant to be waiting with bated breath and tuning in every day hoping to find out.

Tweet from Keri Davies:

I’m pleased to say that dialogue returns this month.

I’m writing scripts (for the following month) which are very nearly like #TheArchers as before - technically simpler, and with fewer characters per episode, but they’ll be a very recognisable listen

Hooray!