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Original poster

Revenge ideas now we've given in to our money grabbing gazundering buyers

70 replies

MamaChris · 17/10/2008 16:55

Now we've given in to the gazundering **s that are buying our flat, we are thinking of ideas for exacting petty revenge. Already suggested:

  • ginsters pie to removal man = ginsters jobbie in toilet (no flush!)
  • kippers behind bath panel
  • remove any fixtures we aren't legally required to leave

we're also thinking of encouraging dog/baby to be sick between floorboards the day of the move

anyone for any more?

OP posts:
ClaireDeLoon · 17/10/2008 17:20

Cross post as I read up the thread sorry Fimbo

FimboGotAxed · 17/10/2008 17:20

LOL at X post

Original poster
MamaChris · 17/10/2008 17:21

hmm. bins shared with our upstairs neighbour (who we like)

OP posts:
choosyfloosy · 17/10/2008 17:24

Sign them up via t'interweb for lots and lots of inappropriate junk mail, preferably as disgusting as possible.

BetteNoire · 17/10/2008 17:26

Oh yes, buy all Sunday papers, and sign them up to some tasteful plates and china doll collections.

ilovemydog · 17/10/2008 17:27

Not sure I'd go out of my way, but at the same time, probably wouldn't clean either. Pack your stuff and just go.

Although calling a few double glazing firms for a quote at former flat wouldn't be that terrible would it?

ChippyMinton · 17/10/2008 17:28

Stopcocks - very hard to budge when they are turned off hard

Original poster
MamaChris · 17/10/2008 17:28

BetteNoire

on of our thoughts too choosy - aiming for incontinence products

OP posts:
judgenutmeg · 17/10/2008 17:28

I read on a website once about someone who let squid ferment in a plastic squeezy bottle of water for a while.

On the day she moved out, she poked the bottle through the letterbox and squeezed squidy water all over the hallway. Invisible but noxious with a smell that ripened over time.

Mustard and cress seed on the doormat sown in the shape of an expletive and watered just before leaving also effective.

ChippyMinton · 17/10/2008 17:31

ROFL at doormat!

lalalonglegs · 17/10/2008 17:32

If they are genuine cash buyers, report them to the Inland Revenue who might be interested to find out where all that money came from. Even if it is legitimate, it will mean no end of hassle for them digging out old bank statements and share certificates.

Original poster
MamaChris · 17/10/2008 17:34

really lalalonglegs?

OP posts:
DevilishDisasterArea · 17/10/2008 17:35

cress seeds sprinkled over carpets then watered.

lalalonglegs · 17/10/2008 17:37

Yeah, the IR has a cheats line (like the benefits cheats line) and you can ring up and tell them your concerns. They will then investigate - initially a letter asking the recipient for information. If that isn't forthcoming or patchy then things get much stickier. I used it on my plumber

simperingbint · 17/10/2008 17:38

i do agree with ruby and expat that whislt revenge is sweet, if they are arses, you might get sued

let karma take care of it

the ceiling might fall in or they might get shitey neighbours who play mariah carey on a loop for 15 hours a day!

but if you must , glitter, as has been pointed out, is terrible to hoover up !we sprinkled some over DDs carpet as part of a surprise gift from the dummy fairies and i am still hoovering up 6 months later !!

DarrellRivers · 17/10/2008 17:40

Rise above their ugly behaviour
You are not like them
And you have your money (nearly) in the bank, and you can go and rent and not worry about mortgages for a while, whilst the skies fall down around you

nkf · 17/10/2008 17:45

I'd say rise above it. The buying system allows them to force a renegotiation at the last minute. The property is probably worth less than when they made an offer. It might have been that or pull out altogether. Sometimes people pass the loss along the chain and nobody loses.

northernrefugee39 · 17/10/2008 17:58

We knew someone who put prawns in the curtain rails...
but... I would rise above I'd hope. We had pita buyers, and i lay awake one night thinking of all these things... but am glad we didn't in the end.

oranges · 17/10/2008 18:02

You know. I bet the sellers of your house do agree to reduce the price, when they realise you can't go through with the sale unless they do. Don't offer to rent from there - look elsewhere and I bet they agree to take a hit.

FuriousGeorge · 18/10/2008 21:17

You might have signed a contract saying that you would leave bulbs in the light fittings,but I bet it didn't specify that the bulbs had to be working.

Soprana · 18/10/2008 21:21

Plant a dead horse arum in the backgarden. It won't flower for a while, but when it does, there will be a big PONG!

cupchar · 18/10/2008 21:25

Just be happy you've sold it

44christmaspuddingsinarow · 18/10/2008 21:27

Mail forwarding soen't always work - the royal mail dont really seem to get it together, so your mail if any that doesn't make it to your new address will proably be destroted.

Now thinkhard, if and it is an if, you got a tax rebait that you didn't know was coming through (I have had one sent by cheque to the house) and it was for 500 squid, would you like the new people to tear it into tiny peices and you never know about the cheque???

MatNanPlus · 18/10/2008 21:35

Put the loo roll in a bag with a split chilli for a week!!

RubberDuck · 18/10/2008 21:43

You'd be amazed at how long it would take to work out that the switches on the fuse box have all been put to off ...