Unhappy in house, sell after 1.5 years?

[WiltedBlossom]

Hi all,
New here but have been reading various posts. Just wondering what your thoughts are on selling a house that you just can't seem to feel happy in?

We've been here for a year and a half, and it's just not bright enough for me, I constantly find myself craving more light and sun. The house feels boxed in by the tall houses opposite and out back, which cast large shadows especially at this time of year, and the small living room window can't be enlarged due to zoning regulations, so a lot of the time it feels like living in a box.

The area is highly sought after so I think we'd be able to sell quite fast. Only thing is that we might never be able to buy again - there's basically nothing on the market, and what is out there is either no better, or totally unaffordable. So we'd be back to renting.

Not a single day passes where I don't think about getting out of here, I don't want to continue like this. I was happy in our bright rental flat before and felt at home there, and I'm hoping that I can feel at home again somewhere else.

Thanks for your thoughts or advice!

Might cost you financially to move again so soon but why not try if you can afford it.

To go back to renting is quite a big decision. It can take time to feel at home in a house.

Can you go try going for cosy to warm it up rather than light (I get the problem but there might well be a different vibe that feels like home). I found jasmine white was a warm white for a darker room and experimenting with lighting can really help. Having some Warner colours among lighter colours can help, eg some fresh green or rust orange accents with rugs and cushions etc.

Some people recommend darker colours to feel cosy. I’m sure there lots of info online. Basically if the choice is the potential insecurity of renting, I’d explore interior design options first.

Go onto Houzz with photos, plans and restrictions and get suggestions or even here or AI. I would try everything before moving out and giving up on ownership.

Tot up all the costs involved in moving - estate agents, solicitors, surveys, moving costs, stamp duty and all the random costs around replacing curtains which don’t fit, bits of furniture which don’t fit etc.

It will be a number at least in the tens of thousands.

Then get a builder and an architect (separately) to look at your property with a view to improving the light and feel and see what they say. The reason for getting both skills is that builders often have the most practical suggestions, an architect may have bigger ideas if your budget is there. Might also be worth paying for an interior designer with a portfolio of work on similar properties to come and make recommendations.

If their suggestions cost less than moving it will probably make more sense to stay, at least until you can afford the next move.

I would sell a house if I did

First of all many people feel sad at this time of year because there is not much sunlight. Find out if you can enlarge the windows and maybe put another in an outside wall or skylights, a lot cheaper than moving. Paint in lighter colours, use shiny surfaces and mirrors are fantastic to reflect light into dark corners. Could you post some photos so we can give you some ideas.

I sold one of my houses after 17 months (it was on the market as soon as possible after the first lockdown). I lost money doing so but it was untenable.

My home is quite bright however, I've also replaced windows with french doors at the back and the difference is incredible. Might that be an option?

How about getting coloured smart light bulbs in the rooms you use most. Put a light fitting in with three bulbs. These can give you a lot of different shades of white and different strengths of light so chances are you will find one which makes it feel much better.

@WiltedBlossom I can relate. As soon as I moved into my new home, I wanted out again. The living area at the front is permanently dark whereas the back where the kitchen is bright pretty much all day. The front being permanently shaded results in a lot of moss and weeds on the drive and a host of other issues. It’s just depressing. The front room has been nicely decorated and all light walls, bright pics, light carpet but just so dark always. It’s just so strange in the summer going from a sunny warm part of the house right into a dark cool room.

I moved in during lockdown when prices were at their highest and will definitely take a financial hit if I sell. Like you it’s a very desirable area and I’m just hoping there’s a smaller property in the same area I could move to but they are few and far between. I’m very much just living in a house and not a home right now. It’s like being in permanent limbo probably made worse living alone there’s no one to sort of make anything about it feel better either 😕.

don’t make an unwise financial decision.

If you are truly bothered by your surroundings, change the decor. Paint the walls bright colors. Paint a mural. Make the space joyous and ridiculous.

We could afford it but it's more the fact of going back to renting.

Hi, thanks, I feel like I've been giving it time and trying out various things. Just can't really get the bright and airy feel I like. But we've not exhausted all the design options yet I suppose.

Thanks, we've been working with an architect to get some ideas and have submitted a request for planning permission but I'm worried about sinking a ton of cash into something that still possibly won't feel right. We haven't exhausted all options yet but I suppose we have to decide what is worth trying financially, or whether we should just cut our losses and sell.

Absolutely don't go back to renting,that's madness. Takes a good coupl of years in my experience for a place to feel properly like home.

Thanks, I just mentioned to someone else that we have been working with an architect to get some ideas, it would probably be hideously expensive though and still might not feel right. We could potentially get planning permission to open up the back of the house (at the moment, one side has a big sliding door, we could potentially put a huge sliding door the whole way across), only thing is that it is the north-facing side with the dining area and kitchen, so not much in the way of sun from there. The south side, where the living room is, is street facing, and we aren't allowed to alter it at all unfortunately.

I'm quite tempted...

You need to stick it out, it's not the end of the world. I feel like there could be some underlying reason you are unhappy and your projcting on the house. People live in tiny shoe boxes and love their homes and people used to live in tiny back to backs and take pride in their home. We have just moved house and I feel a bit the same. I'm blaming the house when really for me I think its because this house was a comprimise and not in the area I would like, butwe cant move to the area i would like right now so it doesnt feel like my dream home and I'm steuggling to warm to it. It's only a house thouhg, it doesnt have to be forever, just try to make the most of it and think of it as a stepping stone not your forever house.

Was your bright airy flat above ground floor level - as this makes a huge difference. (Although if you’re boxed in & in shadows this would be no different whatever floor you’re on). If you can afford it & will be able to get another house that gives you more light I’d go for it as it’s a big thing & gets you down. But is it the only thing you dislike b’cos w’ever you go will have a different drawback, as unfortunately as I’ve discovered there’s no such thing as a perfect property!

Could you rent your current house out and rent something you like more?
I know your still renting but your not losing out on more fees/stamp duty and your house sounds like it might be a good investment.

Yes, I think I am susceptible to seasonal depression, I also get really down on gloomy, rainy days here. In our old place (rented flat with floor-to-ceiling windows) it was fine and I didn't notice it, but here in the house it just gets way too dull.
I mean, we can possibly rip out the remaining interior walls (it's essentially open plan already) but we unfortunately can't add any windows to the south-facing side, it's not permitted, only potentially to the north side.
Have got mirrors up where it makes most sense.

Why did you sell your previous house so soon, what made it so difficult? Was it more a neighbour or location thing?

To be honest, the upper floor and attic are pretty bright, it's just the living room really, as it just has one window and it's a comparatively big room, we did ask if we'd be able to extend that window and were unfortunately denied permission by the council (the houses are 100 y.o. and they want to maintain the character). We could possibly put in a bigger sliding door at the back but it's the north-facing side, so no extra sun.

Thanks, we have Philips Hue light fittings/bulbs and they don't help me that much, as I just don't really like artificial light. I do use our Samsung TV as a lightbox some days though, I don't find it as harsh as the overhead lights.

Sorry to hear you are in a similar situation. I know totally what you mean about feeling in limbo. Buying this place was intended to give us stability but I almost feel like it's had the opposite effect, it's just unfortunate.
I do live with family but it's a difficult topic to speak about, as they don't feel the same way, they don't seem to be as bothered by the lack of light and windows.

So far I've been managing it by doing as much as I can with furniture arrangement and mirrors, I could repaint the room but really it needs more or bigger windows (which we can't get planning permission for).

I really don't want to go back to renting but I'm fed up of feeling like I'm couped up in the dark. I can hack it for a bit longer but I'm not sure how long...