Is it ok for two children to share a room?

[kiana2015]

I would like another baby but I live in a 2 bed, we will move to bigger eventually but not in the next few years, obviously for the first 6months-year the baby would be with us but would it be ok for them to both share? Current DD is 9 months so similar age and my bedroom is big enough for a cot if needed. I know people do it so I'm not asking if it's possible I'm asking if people think it's ok or not

Of course it is alright for DC to share rooms. It is entirely normal.

I thought you were going to say they were 12 and 14 or something.

Ofcourse it's fine. Even if you had a boy next time they'd be absolutely fine sharing for years.

Children have shared rooms, and beds, for centuries! It’s a perfectly normal arrangement.

At those ages up to school age it's fine, when they start puberty they will benefit from separate rooms.

Of course it's OK!

Then again, read this thread..............

Page 8 | We have no bedroom and it's stressful | Mumsnet

Of course - totally normal!

I shared a bedroom with DBro until I was 12 and we moved to a bigger house.

Of course.

Absolutely - that’s no age gap at all and if new baby turns out to be a female in theory you might never have to move at all. The other thread suggested you read is irrelevant as there is a 7 year age gap with both children ND.

Our boys shared from when the eldest was 5 and the youngest was 4 months, until they were 6 and 11. It worked fine, when the youngest was a baby and still waking up, the eldest just slept through it all luckily. The room was big enough they had space for both their things, but they also had a playroom downstairs which helped.

The eldest then started high school and hit puberty, so desperate for his own space. Luckily we managed to move house and they have their own rooms now.

Close in age and actual siblings, it should be fine for at least a few years.

you do need to be prepared for the unexpected. My ASD dd absolutely couldn’t handle sharing a room. She needs a private space she can decompress every day. I suppose if that wasn’t her bedroom it could be another space in the house that was off-limits to everyone else during the day if we had not other options.

Mine are 10 and 4 and share. It is what it is, until we move (hopefully soon) there has been no other option. If it were to continue we would get bunk beds, as it is eldest is in her ladder bed she's had before youngest was on the scene and youngest is in a cut down single.

I live in a two bed but can't afford a three bed and I don't think we will ever be able to. Seeing some of the comments here that say 'it's fine for a few years' or 'I thought they were 12 and 15' or 'we moved to a bigger house when they were 10 and 12' makes me sad and think I'm doing something wrong.

No you're not. I never had my own room as my parents couldn't afford a bigger house and when they split up I ended up having to share a room with both sisters. And look I grew up completely normal and no psychological damage 😁 don't feel like you're doing something wrong. In the real world siblings share rooms until they leave home 😱🤭

@Devilsmommy thank you ☺️. I guess the post brought out my own insecurities and questions about it. Me and my sister both had our own rooms and I am very conscious that I cannot give my DC what I had, so that's really lovely to hear x

I'm sorry I really don't intend to make you feel like that, I was genuinely curious of others opinions. Growing up I had my own room, when I turned 14 we moved and I had to share a room with a 10 and 5 year old, this wasn't because my parents had no money but because they didn't see the point to pay for more rooms if they could squish us in together, they didn't buy a wardrobe because why when we can fold the clothes and keep them at the end of our beds. I resent my parents for this and I was wondering if others would have the same feeling if it's for reasons such as not being able to afford. Reading your post I would never think bad of that

@kiana2015 oh no please don't apologise! You have every right to ask the question and I'm sure hundreds of posts on MN trigger people's own insecurities every day! It's what makes it such a great debate :) They are purely my own insecurities and that's my issue. Interesting what you said about your childhood though and how that led to resentment. Got me thinking about about things in my childhood and even though we had our own comfy bedrooms there were other things I resented! My DS haven't said anything about the room situation - yet, so I assume they are ok, though they are only 10 (twins) so still time... I think we have to remember at the end of the day if they have a loving home, that should be the most important thing. I think nowadays we have so much expectation of space and privacy whereas our grandparents or parents share stories of siblings squashed in one room and had lots of fun x

The only time I stopped sharing rooms as a child was when my sibling went to university, on their return we shared again! Nothing wrong with it, past or present.

It’s fine.

I shared a room with my sister until she left home and then I missed her!

You’re planning to move to a bigger place eventually so it’s fine for many years even if your children happen to be different sexes.

This was 60 years ago, but my mother used to share a bed - not just a room - with her aunt, until they moved and her sisters came along, when she shared a bed and bedroom with her 2 sisters. Things have changed obviously but they were all fine, though she did not enjoy sharing her bed with her aunt!

Years ago I read an article about children in the same bed room. It was about families who lived in Manhattan - a very costly place to rent or own and space is scarce. The article noted it wasn’t unusual for 4 children in bunk beds to share a room.

My children had to share - 2 in one bedroom. they are adults now, and have often told me (unprompted lol ) what wonderful childhoods they had. It’s about much more than how many children to a bedroom.

I shared a room until my older sister left home, and then gad a room each.

Sorry - changed my mind as you already have a SS.

This. I used to share with 2 sisters it did me no harm at all and we are all close as adults. DC do not need a bedroom to themselves.

Yes fine if you’re planning to move to somewhere bigger eventually! That covers you for an opposite sex sibling, because they can share when little but will need separate rooms when the eldest becomes a preteen. Also, any other unexpected scenarios like that thread linked above with the OP on a sofa bed because they have a 2 bed and the DDs can’t share due to ASD. Because yes same sex NT siblings that are close-ish in age can usually share until they leave home without any issues beyond the usual sibling stuff, but there’s no guarantee that’ll be the set up you find yourself in, so I would want to be confident that you’ll either be able to move or extend within the next few years.