Homeless with 2 children

[Sammy923]

Hi All,

I am a single mum with 2 children ages 2 and 4.

Long story short I have been living with my parents in their house together with my 3 siblings. It was very overcrowded and yesterday my mum asked me to leave.

I contacted the council back in April as I could see this was going to come and was told I could sign up to the rent guarantee scheme and to find private rented and they would pay for rent of upto £1100. I found nothing for this amount but I still contacted 2 bed properties over this amount and none in 2 months have said they accept housing benefit.

I called my housing officer yesterday and told her about the situation. She called my mum and confirmed that she asked me to leave. My housing officer then asked me to call all family and friends to ask if I could stay as I hadn't been doing a good job of finding privately rented (I have been calling new properties nearly everyday). I tried to ask my family if I could stay and all said they had no space. I then spoke with my housing officer numerous times yesterday and she kept saying the council couldn't help me and I needed to go back and speak to my mum.

It got to 2pm so I decided to pack and bag and take my children to the council office to explain. When I got there a lady told me they couldn't do anything and that it was upto my housing officer to make a decision. Until 4:30pm (bearing in mind office closed at 5pm) my housing officer kept telling me to go back home and she wasn't able to help me. Then when it got close to closing time she said there was emergency accommodation available of out the town and that I would be better off at home. I told her I would accept anything and going back home wasn't an option. After 5 minutes she miraculously found something in my town although it had a shared bathroom I was grateful. Today she has moved me out of town because she said kids need their own bathroom.

My 4 year old won't be able to go to nursery from here. I feel like such a bad mother for putting my kids through this and it's only the second day and I feel so stressed and exhausted!!!!!!

I have asked my housing officer when I could move to a more permanent solution and she said I could be in emergency accommodation for months to come and my only option is the rent guarantee scheme.

I am band 4 and have been bidding for council properties but coming as 180. Now that I'm homeless, should I be in a higher band?

I suffer with sciatica and have very bad flare up. When this happens my family at e a big help with children so it's important I'm close to them so I don't know what I'm going to do now in a different town.

Has anyone else been through this? Is there anything else I should be doing?

Is there a law centre, or CAB with a Housing Advice scheme? Or contact Shelter.

Sorry you are in such a difficult situation OP.

Do you have any additional income / savings you could use to help you secure a property? How much more would you need to spend?

Are the kids dad helping at all? Do you have any income from work?

I’d keep looking and applying if you want to live in a very specific area.

I haven't contacted shelter England and they have said all councils have their own rules/process and they cannot advise on a lot of things.

Kids Dad left before my 2nd was even born and hasn't even been back to see his kids. Not even any contact!

I used all my savings whilst I was living with my Mum so I literally have nothing.

I didn't know if I was entitled to any benefits as I hadn't asked for any kind of help before so I didn't apply up until last month.

I'm continuing to search for a private rented 2 bed but all are saying no to housing benefit.

Is there any 1 beds available to rent privately for under £1100? I know it’s not ideal with 2 kids but surely better than nowhere. Do you work?

I don't work because of childcare plus my sciatica and even one beds are over £1100. I live in the southeast and it's extortionate here. I'm so stuck.

Also my housing officer said I can only get a 2 bed and any smaller wouldn't be appropriate.

I am band 4 and have been bidding for council properties but coming as 180. Now that I'm homeless, should I be in a higher band?

You need to find the "allocations policy", "lettings policy" or bidding policy on the website and scour through it to see what the rules on bands and points are.

I actually called the allocations team and the lady on the other end was being very rude and said the only way I would go to a higher band was if i was disabled. Being homeless didn't make a difference.

Honestly, I would stay put in temporary housing and wait it out.

I think you will go to the top of the list for housing. But maybe look into this and make sure your position goes up etc. Eventually you will get something appropriate and council so more affordable. In the meantime time, make sure you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to.

Obviously it's a rubbish situation, but being a single mum with two children will put you towards the top of the list for housing so you will get it eventually.

Just seen this. Phone again tomorrow and hope for a nicer person on the phone!

It's a rubbish situation but this is the reality of the housing crisis. Your council have acted legally so there's no recourse there. How quickly you will get to the top of the housing list depends on your area but I'd make plans on the assumption to you'll be staying where you are for now. It's shit, I'm sorry.

As a society we need to build more houses.

Could you consider privately renting in a different area where rent less expensive?

Thank you for your message. I'm not really sure what I'm entitled to though. I would have thought the council would be so much more sympathetic but then I went to the council yesterday I was horrified. I feel so alone.

https://www.entitledto.co.uk/organisations/benefits-calculator

Go onto entitled to to work out how much your benefits should be.

Unfortunately the council probably get many people that turn up homeless asking for housing so may come across as harsh and uncaring.

Just try to look to the future, you will get housed eventually and one day things will be better

It sounds very difficult. I hope the children are coping ok? Would your mum be ok if you popped back during the day for an hour or two so the kids can see family?

Try to understand that the council are very probably doing their best for you and the hundreds of others in similar situations. They are likely under staffed. But that's no reason to be rude to you.

I think you'll have to take some responsibility for yourself though. Find out what benefits you're entitled to. Make a csa claim against your ex. Keep looking for accom.

Good luck.

My daughter cried herself to sleep last night because she wanted Nanny.

My car needs a new battery which I can't afford at the moment so had to rely on my sister today to drop me out of town after my housing officer said she couldn't help with travel.

When my car is sorted, could I go home for a few hours each day but would my housing officer see this as I have somewhere to stay?

My kids are extremely close to my mum and siblings.

I have thought about this but my immediate family are the only family I have. I suffer with sciatica too so I do rely on them for help with the kids.

Thank you for your messages and help. The thing that keeps getting me upset is as soon as I mention council housing my housing officer snaps and says that's not an option for me and my banding won't be going higher. She won't even speak to the allocations team on my behalf.

I do think you could visit your Mums place during the day but I would sleep at your emergency accomodation each night. I do think you need to just wait it out and eventually they will house you. This is the problem with underinvestment into social housing.

How does it make sense to pay a private landlord £1100 quid a month for years till the children are adults and not invest that money into housing? Such short term thinking, I do think politicians/ LA can't/ don't want to think long term. Just get through their years in power then hand over a shit show to the next lot and complain about it.

Whilst it might be difficult. Can you move a little bit of a distance. If you cannot find a 1 bed for £1100 then you must live in a relatively expensive area.

Finding another location will get you a bigger property. Can your family help pay for some private treatment for the sciatica? Getting that cured will lessen the need for family to help with childcare.

Can you get a work from home admin job to get back into employment?

I am so sorry you are going through this OP.

Please document everything that is said to you and when, especially the number of times they have tried to get you to live with your mum despite having been asked to leave.

I usually find Shelter so helpful so I am surprised that they have copped out with helping you. Do you feel strong enough to call them back and see if you get a more helpful person?

I hate even typing this on my screen - it’s the position our bloody government puts people in. If you mention that you are having suicidal thoughts, they might take helping you more seriously.

Don’t say that to the council though. They might suggest your kids need to be in care if you do (admittedly I know very little about this).

Sending big hugs and hoping for lots of luck for you.

Councils house single parents with kids in one bedroom homes, it’s not ideal but they do do it.
Try looking for a one bed private rent and keep on bidding or staying put in temp accommodation and hoping you’ll get a flat on the council within a year or 2 depending on your area.

You will be able to find the council housing allocation policy on your council website, this will tell you what band you should be in as someone who is homeless (should be band 1 or 2). Try contacting your health visitor, some areas have specialist health visitors for homeless families who know the system inside out and will be able to support you. Unfortunately families are staying in B&Bs for months now, the housing situation is desperate 😞

I'm so sorry you're in this situation @Sammy923 It doesn't sound easy at all. A lot of posters have made some really good suggestions.
Can I just ask, how old your siblings are and why they couldn't move out instead? I feel it's a bit unfair to make you homeless when you have 2 kids to take care of.