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Original poster

Week of Exchange and seen better property….!

74 replies

EdgarAllenRaven · 20/11/2023 00:41

We’ve been in a chain for 5 months, having viewed our property several times and the Vendors have been so unbelievably kind… even when our buyer fell through, we got another buyer at a lesser price and they offered a discount to cover the gap!

But now, the week of our exchange, we have seen a better property, Bigger space, extended, bigger garden, bigger bedrooms, closer to station.
If we could get it, it would be a forever home.
whereas the original one needs a lot of work and has a smaller footprint and garden in general.

I would feel so awful pulling out… but I just know in my gut that I have to put an offer in tomorrow.

what should I do? Is it mad to risk everything for a new house?
And if we were to pull out, what reason could I possibly give…?! I can’t believe I’m about to be this wanker that ruins people’s lives!

FWIW they have already moved into their onward so would not lose that, at least. But I know they’ve been needing the money all this time. And I’ve developed a good rapport with their agent who also wants to be paid… feeling guilty.
(We would still sell and go into rental so other parties not affected)

OP posts:
CountryCob · 20/11/2023 06:52

Just as a note of caution there is no guarantee the offer on the new house will be accepted or proceed to completion. Your transaction is much more advanced and a safer bet. If the new house looks good to you it will to others. There is a risk of loosing the current house and incurring expense but not getting over the line with the new house which is also an unknown quantity in terms of its legal title, physical condition in terms of the unseen elements of reliability of the vendors. That is my view, the risk of not proceesing with the new unknown quantity house is a significant factor.

Elphamouche · 20/11/2023 07:02

I couldn’t be such a dick. It’s 5 weeks until Christmas, these people have moved already and you are screwing with their finances.

You waited for this house for 5months, I genuinely hope you don’t get the “better” house.

FitAt50 · 20/11/2023 07:09

Mooshroo · 20/11/2023 06:50

Don’t worry about it. Pull out if you have an offer accepted on the other property. Tell your seller it’s just a “change in circumstances”

I hope this happens to you one day and you understand how heartbreaking it is. The sellers have been incredibly patient and even reduced the price to support the OP. Don't be that horrible person.

Unusualactualname · 20/11/2023 07:19

Shitty thing to do. Don't.

DrySherry · 20/11/2023 07:58

Do what's best for you and yours. Don't get caught up worrying about anyone else's situation in this. That's not your business. If you miss the better house you will likley regret it.

Original poster
EdgarAllenRaven · 20/11/2023 08:07

In answer to some questions, the reason I was still looking was because I didn't "love" the original house... it offers many things but the downstairs living space was small and I was dreading the idea of having to do the extension work.... my husband loves it however. There haven't been any other properties in that area coming up, until this one.

The plan with the original house would probably be to do it up then possibly sell it in 5 years and buy sthg with a bigger footprint.

Yes I would be worried about it falling through or us being gazumped!

We are already in a rental so would extend that and would shoulder the extra costs.

I AM worried about Karma... especially as this HAS happened to us when an earlier chain fell through and it was devastating, so stressful and I was raging.

I don't know if I could bring myself to tell them that we had changed our minds.... but equally don't really want to fabricate a lie about a personal disaster etc. Aargh!

OP posts:
CountryCob · 20/11/2023 08:12

It is tricky. Sounds like as a couple you need to agree that you don't want to buy house 1. There is no guarantee you would get house 2 so it isn't really an either or situation. If you like house 2 others will as well

Mrgwl29 · 20/11/2023 08:14

I wouldn't, just on the basis that you have a firm accepted offer Vs the potential of maybe getting this house, but possibly losing this sale to them be outbid/have flaky vendors/who knows what.

Just because you've seen doesn't mean you'll get it and even if you did who knows how the sale might go? Maybe I'm over cautious but the sales process is so shit and you've sounded very lucky with your vendors.

Soontobe60 · 20/11/2023 08:17

Have you viewed this house? Is your DH in agreement? If you do pull out, you already know that someone is going to be devastated and possibly end up £1000s out pocket. Lying to them about why isn’t going to change that. So at least be honest!

Twiglets1 · 20/11/2023 08:17

The first step is to view house 2 if you haven’t already and if you love it, make an offer. See what reaction you get and if you can agree a price, check their situation etc.
The other EA won’t care that you are already proceeding on another house and close to Exchange. That’s what we found, anyway (this is in answer to a previous poster who seemed to think the new EA would consider you flaky buyers).

Crazycatladyy · 20/11/2023 08:24

What happens to your chain, are the people buying yours happy to wait longer if you start over with a new house?

Potofteaplease · 20/11/2023 08:48

If you genuinely prefer the other house then I would pull out. The sellers are not going to be homeless as they’re already in their new home. Unfortunately if things drag out, there’s a risk properties fall through/better ones appear. This is a HUGE investment and at the end of the day it’s business transaction. Property prices are decreasing and it’s a buyers’ market especially if that buyer is not in a chain.
Yes it’s not nice to happen but you can’t pay hundreds of thousands of pounds just for sentiment

TerfTalking · 20/11/2023 08:51

Are you assuming you can have the other house and you wont lose your buyer by pissing them around for another 5 months?

I think you were right to be wary about Karma.

Mooshroo · 20/11/2023 08:54

FitAt50 · 20/11/2023 07:09

I hope this happens to you one day and you understand how heartbreaking it is. The sellers have been incredibly patient and even reduced the price to support the OP. Don't be that horrible person.

Show quote history

It did albiet it was our seller who decided not to move.

It’s far too much money to spend just so you don’t upset someone you’re never going to see again.

I do think OP should have withdrawn a long time ago though.

Wintersgirl · 20/11/2023 08:54

Go and view the house, it might not be "all that" when you see it in real life, some houses look fantastic on the web but when you see them in the cold light of day they don't live up to expectations..

Twiglets1 · 20/11/2023 08:58

Crazycatladyy · 20/11/2023 08:24

What happens to your chain, are the people buying yours happy to wait longer if you start over with a new house?

Good question… we were willing to move into a rental property if necessary once we saw house 2. In the end it wasn’t necessary as the sale went through in 2 months ( partly because we didn’t get a survey as we were 100% committed this time round).
But @EdgarAllenRaven does need to consider will their buyers wait or would they be willing to move into a rental if necessary.

FlatWhiteExtraHot · 20/11/2023 08:59

EdgarAllenRaven · 20/11/2023 08:07

In answer to some questions, the reason I was still looking was because I didn't "love" the original house... it offers many things but the downstairs living space was small and I was dreading the idea of having to do the extension work.... my husband loves it however. There haven't been any other properties in that area coming up, until this one.

The plan with the original house would probably be to do it up then possibly sell it in 5 years and buy sthg with a bigger footprint.

Yes I would be worried about it falling through or us being gazumped!

We are already in a rental so would extend that and would shoulder the extra costs.

I AM worried about Karma... especially as this HAS happened to us when an earlier chain fell through and it was devastating, so stressful and I was raging.

I don't know if I could bring myself to tell them that we had changed our minds.... but equally don't really want to fabricate a lie about a personal disaster etc. Aargh!

Why on earth did you offer on it and get as far as completing if you didn’t like it?

coathangerwire · 20/11/2023 09:04

How would you feel if the situation was reversed and they did that to you? If you're comfortable doing that to someone else then go for it.

Bendysnap · 20/11/2023 09:11

Don’t do it. You have absolutely no guarantee that house 2 will accept your offer, that the survey won’t uncover something horrific, that your mortgage offer doesn’t time out/supports the survey valuation, that the vendors change their mind…the list is endless.

go for what you’ve researched and been working toward for months AND do what’s morally right

Littlebitofacold · 20/11/2023 09:15

I’m not sure I found do it. Buying and selling is so volatile at the moment and we had an awful experience of losing a house two weeks before move in date and if I was already mid way through a transaction that was going well I would be too scared to jump ship in case we lost the new one.

We still haven’t moved but there are houses we weren’t successful at offering on which still haunt me a little and I would just put this new one down to one same thing. One you didn’t get.

Littlebitofacold · 20/11/2023 09:16

Are you already in rented? It’s not clear as in OP it says you’d still sell and go into rented and in update it says you already are.

That would also affect my decision I think.

TheLongpigs · 20/11/2023 09:20

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush...

I wouldn't do it as the chances of actually buying house 2 wouldn't be high enough for me. Getting an offer accepted, survey, seller going through with it. There's so much that can go wrong.

CremeBrunette · 20/11/2023 09:21

Twiglets1 · 20/11/2023 08:17

The first step is to view house 2 if you haven’t already and if you love it, make an offer. See what reaction you get and if you can agree a price, check their situation etc.
The other EA won’t care that you are already proceeding on another house and close to Exchange. That’s what we found, anyway (this is in answer to a previous poster who seemed to think the new EA would consider you flaky buyers).

Our estate agent knew our buyer had pulled out of a sale and advised us to go with another offer, even though it was slightly lower. The estate agents don’t want sales hanging around on their books, so given a choice between a known flaky buyer and a potential non-flakey buyer that are offering the same, then they would advise the potential non-flakey one. I think it depends how popular the house is and as OP says nothing like this has come on for a while, it has the potential to be very popular.

maisouimaisoui1 · 20/11/2023 09:40

Don't know why people are asking about still looking. I still have Rightmove alerts and we moved FIVE years ago!

SuddenlyOld · 20/11/2023 09:44

Morally and ethically not ok.

Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

You've had 5 months to decide.

if this other house hadn't come on the market you would have exchanged so you are happy enough with the house.

What if this was your dream house and your buyers pulled out this week?

Don't forget that in Scotland you wouldn't be able to pull out after making an offer (the survey and searches are done by the vendor as part of the sale so you see them before you offer). Just because the English system allows this to happen doesn't make it right 😪

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