Where to live near Oxford?

[Ruthietuthie]

We are considering moving for a dream job in Oxford (currently in the US, but from the UK) but the salary (university position) is far less than we make now.
Where would be a lovely place to live, commutable to Oxford (although probably not going in everyday)? 500,000GBP budget, three bedrooms ideally, period charm if possible, good primary and secondary school. A friendly small town or village would be ideal, as I imagine we can't afford Oxford itself.
Thank you.

Would Oxford even be open to the idea of a 'sabbatical post'? Or would you not tell them that you might only stay for a year? There have been a number of instances in recent years when that has happened, and it causes huge bad feeling - the university thinks it is making a permanent appointment, but the candidate has no firm commitment to staying. It's especially unfair on the graduate students you say you want to acquire, if you abandon them after one year.

@AvengingGerbil, no, definitely not.
I would have to decline the position, but look to spend my next sabbatical there (funded by my current institution and my grant funding). At least I can spend a lovely year in Oxford, work on the collections, and work more closely with colleagues there who I would like to work with in the future. That would be the idea.
My institution would be fine with me taking a year's leave (whether sabbatical or an unpaid leave, supported by my grant funding) but not fine with me taking that time out to "try out" a new position. And I definitely wouldn't ever take the Oxford position unless I knew we were there for the long haul.

Oof could you bring yourself to turn down an Oxford fellowship?

@Theelephantinthecastle, I am SO TORN.
If it was just me, or if my husband's career was portable, I would take the Oxford position in a second. But as this isn't the case, well, the decision is getting more and more difficult the more I think about it.
I have found it very difficult to be happy in my current position - even though it is well paid, lots of freedom - I am SO STAGNANT here. And I've tried and tried to make this position a fit, find little parts of the institution with possibilities or kindred spirits. But it just hasn't worked - I am a square peg in a round hole. The new position is everything I am interested in. But it would be such an impact on our family finances, on my husband's career...
It is keeping me awake at night.

Is there a middle way? Taking the job but planning to do it for 3 years and then making a decision? Schooling wise if you came back, your son would have middle school to adjust before high school. And your husband might then have found a great job

Oxfordshire is lovely! Follow your dream! Your son is only 5 so is very adaptable.
look at Charlbury - a really lovely and beautiful village, period charm aplenty. But big enough has some shops and stuff going on. I imagine your budget will get you a two bed period property there. Lovely primary, 16 mins to Oxford on the train, also good connections if your husband gets a job in London rather than Oxford.

Best of luck for the future 🌟

Life is for living and if your husband is up for it. I’d take that adventure. what’s the worst that happens? You work out you don’t love it and go back to your old life with a new appreciation for what you had.
Oxfordshire really is a lovely place to live, culture, scenery, history. Lovely upbringing for children - opportunities to be outside and in nature. Plus you’re super close to London and have everything that goes with that. Great base to travel from too if you and your family want to explore Europe.

My daughter is at a state school in the city. They have a maths specialist, forest school teacher and DT teacher on staff. The DC learn public speaking, Latin and chess. There are two libraries (fiction and non-fiction) and a large ICT suite. Large copse for forest school, daily run track, MUGA and inspiring leaders. It’s not true to say all state schools are pits of despair.

Oh my. I live 40 mins outside of Oxford and don't actually recognise the world you have just described. Small village school, library, specialist teachers etc. Haven't had any issues getting healthcare appointments despite the current pressures (and I work in healthcare research so am fully aware of the headlines and how tough it can be in academia). Have worked in the US too and it isn't all perfect either. In fact, through choice came back to the UK.

@Ruthietuthie you need to stop listening to individual viewpoints and do some proper, unbiased research to decide whether the role is what you want, and whether you think the opportunities to be closer to family work better for you. We can't advise you on this, but don't get swept away by the negative comments on here. I promise you, it isn't bad over here, just different, and we will eventually have a new government so things will hopefully level up. A few years ago no one I knew wanted to move to the US or were actively moving back because of the volatility of Trump, so it is swings and roundabouts.

Given the music you describe your son already being involved with, I'd recommend looking at the choirschools and considering whether being a chorister would be something he might enjoy, and something that would make sense and work for your family. New College audition in year 2 (so age 6-7), Magdalen and Christchurch from year 3 I think. Choristers get decent bursaries (and there is additional means tested help) and are in a good position to get financial support for senior schools later. Academic salaries don't stretch far for school fees the way they once did!

Oxford is a magical place op - do it! River, parks, amazing culture etc And the countryside and villages around there are lovely. You will make it work. It’s a fab place to raise a kid. Rent if you need to to make it easier? Lots of people bus and cycle in. A great flat will be cheaper and if you are central you will have parks etc nearby

This is a very good idea if your son enjoys singing and is talented. He'd get an exceptional musical education, incredible experieces and you'd pay significantly less for an excellent schoo.

I'm going to be with those pps saying you can make this work for your family. Obviously biased (see username), but I could have written your post some years ago. And all the things you seem to want I got. Stone, thatched cottage in village with great schooling options, certainly most of those things your son already does, my children did/had access to.
Easy transport into town by car, bus or train.

Look north of Oxford for housing, schools and quality of villages. Ask college/department about wfh and the university parking permit scheme if driving, otherwise check out King Sutton or Islip for trains.

PM me if you want to buy my place and I'll consider it😁 I'm heading for retirement and other adventures now.

I think very few maybe none of the posters here have had the experience of a top flight private US education and state school here....I'm usually all for adventures with kids but for me this would be too big a sacrifice in earning, your husbands career and your sons education. I'd 💯 go for the sabbatical and if you it works for a year then apply for a full time position. If you do come perhaps your husband could find a post at Oxford Brookes?

Sorted for you OP- lovely new build but in a traditional style- very nice area , just south of Oxford and on train. Lovely interior- I used to live in oxford - will have a look at others. I think this is actually pretty decent value

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/132309839#/?channel=RES_NEW

This is nice in Headington - (actually in oxford) very handy too for the excellent JR hospital- a big selling point in the UK OP!!

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/128976875#/?channel=RES_BUY

And this isn't bad too in Kidlington which is on the north side of oxford and a decent little town (my son went to school there) it's a pretty busy road though - but is detached and looks in good order- around 4 miles north of Oxford and a great bus route and a station very close by

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/132414905#/?channel=RES_BUY

Have to be honest though I wouldn't buy in your position - I would rent- we rented in summertown but it's pricey- but cheaper than paying all the costs involved in buying and then deciding it's not for you

What a difficult decision! My DW and I moved to the US and then back to the UK (with US-born child) following her academic career. Oxford is a beautiful place but it would be a very different lifestyle for you. I'm a teacher so my job is fairly portable. (As chance would have it I taught in a small private school in DC and we lived in one of the suburbs at the end of a metro line, so I think I know where you're talking about with your DS!)

Just coming back to agree with everyone who's said that Oxford and Oxfordshire are, on the whole, absolutely fabulous. I am from the North East originally but I came here for my undergraduate degree, stayed for my master's and DPhil and since then have never left. It can be a bit "The University is Mother, the University is Father" but it really is just such a staggeringly beautiful place and being part of it feels like a fairytale even with all the bad bits after all these years.

I am a relatively early career academic and I have several positions at Oxford and elsewhere. If I was offered an actual Fellowship I'd bite their hand off.

That first one is probably a couple of miles away from the JR and actually in Lye Valley not Headington.

I know, because I actually really did live right next to the JR for some time.

It's far closer to the Churchill Hospital.

Honestly, I think you'd regret it for the rest of your life if you didn't take this opportunity. I live in Oxfordshire (15 minutes by train from Oxford), have educated my children in the state system and we have a fabulous life. The schools have been excellent, and anything that you think is missing in state education can easily be provided by myriad clubs and activities out of school.

I think it's a matter of looking at what's important to you – is it all about the money and the material lifestyle, or are job satisfaction and raising your child near your family (not to mention the constant threat of gun violence, particularly in schools)? Only you can answer that.

Oxfordshire resident here. Agree that small towns like Thame, Abingdon have much better bus transport links. And there are bus lanes so the commute in is bearable. Villages are hit and miss. Or use the park and ride.

Living in Oxford is great for teens but the best school by a country mile is Cherwell so I’d look in that catchment area and let that guide your location choice rather than ‘look’.

In all honesty I'd go for it. Oxford is so utterly magical, your son is only 5, that's an easy move. If your DH gets a decent job which no reason to think not then you would hopefully be ok financially.

It will eat away at you if you don't. Keep us posted will you?

@GasPanic apologies I just went by the description- nice house though I thought.
I did think that hospital was fab- had to go a couple of times- all very clean and efficient.

Personally if I was OP I would rent in summertown- it's expensive I know) we rented there for a couple of years- lovely house too)

But it's a lot less expensive than paying out on stamp duty etc and realising it's not for you , especially as it's a bit of a rocky market- no guarantee it's going to go upwards and upwards- would then see how you feel after a year or so. They don't know the area or how a job will go- I wouldn't buy based on that