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Original poster

HELP! Ex pulling out of house sale after exchange of contracts

160 replies

Promise22 · 14/08/2022 20:46

In need of urgent advice please. I have been legally divorced now for more than 6 months. I have a consent order in place that says that I either buy ex from his share of the house or we sell it. We have put the house on the market back in Feb as I simply don't have the funds to buy him out. Exchanged contracts last week and he has been bullying me for my new address (when I haven't even moved house!). He is controlling/abusive and I have been advised to seek non-molestation order in the past (I just didn't have the brand width or the resources to go through with it). After a series of threatening text messages over the weekend, which I chose not to engage with (that has probably annoyed him even more), he emailed our solicitor saying that he is pulling out of the house sale. There is no reason what's so over for this except that he wants to punish me somehow and prevent me from buying my own place. Note that he is not buying another property, he will simply take his share of the equity from the family home. However, I am heavily involved in the onward purchase and have even started a full house rewire between now and completion (planned for this Fri). I will speak to solicitors tomorrow and seek legal advice, but can anyone please tell me if this is even possible? Can he pull the plug on the whole chain (a chain of 4 houses) without justification? Any thoughts on similar experience or next steps I need to take will be much appreciated!!

OP posts:
becoming3 · 15/08/2022 19:25

Promise22 · 15/08/2022 12:41

Thank you all for your thoughts and moral support. Ex texting again to say that he wants to 'discuss things calmly' 😳. I don't think there is more to say! I am just not engaging with him. He then writes with more threats telling me to give him my new address so he can revoke his pulling out or he will stop the sale 'at all costs'. I will give him the address nearer the time if I run out of options but waiting for legal advice first! Wish me luck 🤞

I would keep all this and seriously consider calling non emergency police for advice. This is surely classed as coercive control? He does not need to know where you live and that is your home where you should feel safe. You should not be bullied into anything.
I wish I had some advice for you honestly this sounds really awful but well done for getting out I can only imagine what it's been like for you!

Good luck x

becoming3 · 15/08/2022 19:28

I have just read that you have already reported him. Well done! Hope it all goes in your favour

HowcanIhelp123 · 15/08/2022 19:30

You do not need to disclose your address. If he wants it he can persue it with the courts, but you can ask not to due to his abuse. Also if he's abroad clearly he isn't needing to come pick the kids up from your house every week.

titchy · 15/08/2022 19:31

According to my conveyancing solicitor he can still stop the sale even now given that this is supposedly an amicable sale

Your conveyancer won't presumably be familiar with cases like this where the sale has been court ordered so it's worth surely speaking to whoever arranged that, even though it'll cost. They can advise on an ex parte as well.

Ask MN to move tbis to legal matters - there are some family solicitors on there who may be able to advise.

Delphigirl · 15/08/2022 19:48

Promise22 · 15/08/2022 17:49

The other issue that I have is that he is now residing overseas and not sure the court will look at an emergency enforcement ex-parte 😭

Doesn’t need to be ex parte. Can be an emergency with notice remote hearing over video - ask for (a) service to his email address ANd text (b) short notice of 24/36 hours (c) attendance by video of exH at least (you can go to court if necessary).

make sure you put in your witness statement both his mobile no and email and details about when he last initiated or responded to email, text or phone calls to those details.

then if he doesn’t show up to the hearing you have a shot at arguing that it is because he is ignoring the hearing, not because he doesn’t know about it.

Original poster
Promise22 · 15/08/2022 20:09

Delphigirl · 15/08/2022 19:48

Doesn’t need to be ex parte. Can be an emergency with notice remote hearing over video - ask for (a) service to his email address ANd text (b) short notice of 24/36 hours (c) attendance by video of exH at least (you can go to court if necessary).

make sure you put in your witness statement both his mobile no and email and details about when he last initiated or responded to email, text or phone calls to those details.

then if he doesn’t show up to the hearing you have a shot at arguing that it is because he is ignoring the hearing, not because he doesn’t know about it.

Show quote history

Thanks so much. Very helpful. Ex received a lengthy email from solicitor and soon backed off. Wondering if I should still ask for compensation given all the stress and harassment he caused me. The police called will send me further details about non-molestation order...I will get to that once I move house! I will believe it once I get the keys! 🙈

OP posts:
Delphigirl · 15/08/2022 20:12

Pick your battles, I say. Keep your eyes on the prize - ie completing and moving on with your life giving him as little thought as humanly possible!

Original poster
Promise22 · 15/08/2022 20:13

Delphigirl · 15/08/2022 20:12

Pick your battles, I say. Keep your eyes on the prize - ie completing and moving on with your life giving him as little thought as humanly possible!

That's exactly the plan! 😁

OP posts:
Caramac555 · 15/08/2022 20:13

Hope it goes through now OP. Honestly he sounds like the worst small time bully, backs off as soon as he knows that legally his threats will backfire on him.

I'd still follow up on the non molestation order in case he dreams up another stunt

Redshoeblueshoe · 15/08/2022 20:14

great update

dubyalass · 15/08/2022 20:22

Just read this in disbelief. What a pathetic weapons-grade cunt he is. All the best with everything, and enjoy your freedom!

Original poster
Promise22 · 15/08/2022 20:30

dubyalass · 15/08/2022 20:22

Just read this in disbelief. What a pathetic weapons-grade cunt he is. All the best with everything, and enjoy your freedom!

The conveyencing solicitor also called me earlier in complete disbelief 🤭 he even said he [ex] needs to prepare for a "shit storm" ...not your typical legal jargon 🤣🤣

OP posts:
Ilikewinter · 15/08/2022 20:36

Well that sounds a more positive update OP, like PP said typical bullying behaviour, backs off as soon as hes challenged.
Im keeping everything crossed for you 🤞🤞

sellthesizzle · 15/08/2022 21:47

Think you're married to my ex!!

Glad you're getting it sorted :)

MaggieFS · 15/08/2022 22:13

Phew! Good luck with completion. Sounds like you have had some good solicitors on your side.

Milkand2sugarsplease · 15/08/2022 22:38

I would set up a PO Box address for him to correspond with the children rather than your new home address. DH has a free one he uses after being advised by his legal team to remain anonymous to his exW after her antics.

lunar1 · 16/08/2022 13:19

I hope everything is progressing as it should and your ex has backed off.

OnceRuralNowUrbanbliss · 16/08/2022 14:56

Thinking of you OP.

Glad he soon backed off on receipt of the legal nasty-o-gram. Thank goodness.

He was just willy wanging as we all suspected.
Hope the remaining few days towards the move into your new home with your special needs kids goes as smoothly as these fraught times can.

Wishing you every success in your post-divorce life.

Original poster
Promise22 · 16/08/2022 16:57

I can breath easy when we can actually complete on Fri. But his stupid email that he sent to try and derail the selling process and cause me distress has cost us potentially an additional £1000 on legal fees! Emailed the solicitor to say he should be solely responsible for additional costs given that he provided no justification!

OP posts:
Delphigirl · 16/08/2022 18:11

You can easily take that out of his share of the proceeds. Let him sue you for it.

Roselilly36 · 16/08/2022 18:45

Yes, my advice would have been to get the solicitor to deal with it, my solicitor, would have had no problem whatsoever in kicking a situation like that well into touch! He sounds a controlling arse, and can’t bear the fact that his control over you is coming to an end, wishing you all the best for the future OP Flowers

SilentHedges · 18/08/2022 18:20

I really hope you complete tomorrow OP. Update please, wishing you all the good stuff.

TooHotToTangoToo · 18/08/2022 18:22

Hope it all went through @Promise22

RobertsRadio · 19/08/2022 10:43

Keeping my fingers crossed for you @Promise22 that you complete on your property sale with no problems or delays.

MacavityTheDentistsCat · 19/08/2022 12:12

@Promise22 Hope all's going well - I have my fingers tightly crossed for you!