Anyone living very much BELOW their means and…

[Boobicoosg]

feeling low because of it?

Let me preface this by saying, it’s all relative etc etc, I am glad to be fed and watered and healthy… but…

It’s been several years now of ‘waiting to buy’ the dream family home. We’ve made very sensible decisions but I feel now, I’m really fed up. Again, very lucky to have a lot of money but it’s just waiting to be spent on the house of our family’s dreams. Currently living in a house we bought outright so we could settle into the area. We thought we would at most be here a year. Now it’s two, and a new baby has arrived. It’s a new build estate, a small semi detached, that is about 1/5th of our actual budget.

Feel like I can no longer breath in it. Both my partner and I love old period country properties and want to be rural. I don’t like it here, from the dog poo that is all around to the type of neighbours (any neighbours in fact 😂). I know it sounds snobby but, I didn’t work this hard for this long, not to be in the house I deserve. I feel I’m getting old waiting!

So tell me off or tell me if you’re in the same situation. Or tell me about your dream home purchase so I can live vicariously through you! We aren’t even fussy and would compromise on a few things but there’s nothing on the market!!!

Yes me OP, I'm living on beans and weetabix so I can save a grand a month this year so I can help the kids buy a house.

Sage advice. I want a period property with at least 5 bedrooms and in the right county. The county across from us - they have a few amazing ones in budget but they would be an hour + from schools and my place of work. We will be happy with half an hour away.

We also wanted about 4 acres but have said, 1.5 would do.

Wanted it all done up but now would take project!

Anyway I’m embarrassed by posting this now, so will try slink off! 😂

We have done similar in the past OP, but while renting, waiting for 'the one' to turn up. It didn't and after 5 years we gave up, and with hindsight sorry we waited so long. At that time at least our money in the bank was earning decent interest (unlike now), which helped a lot with the rent. We moved to a different part of the country, and are just about to move again. This time we will make compromises and accept we probably won't find our ideal - that is, a house without neighbours rather than a specific type of house, but will give it 6 months in rental and buy, can't bear to think of it being years again..

So tell me off or tell me if you’re in the same situation. Or tell me about your dream home purchase so I can live vicariously through you!

www.walesonline.co.uk/lifestyle/welsh-homes/remote-rural-renovation-project-valley-22863286

Can you buy this one so I can live vicariously through YOU? It's only 500k and so beautiful 😥

Hi OP, I've found that it's good to not set yourself a specific set of parameters for what you want.

I was adamant I wanted a period character property, fireplaces, beams, nooks and crannies. I looked at several that on paper should have been perfect and they all left me cold.

Was persuaded to look at an identikit new build and the moment I walked in I knew it was my house. It just felt friendly and right. I've been really happy here.

Good luck in your search!

Fully agree with plot as number one priority. Can you start looking under your ideal price bracket at things that you could in time add a very large extension to?
Sounds like you have the ability to save and you are making quite as big jump up so even if it's far from ideal now, it would still represent an improvement.
If you are being out bid then it sounds like you are pushing the jump up just beyond what you can manage when actually one step up rather than five just now would be okay

Don't slink off. Despite what MN would have you believe, we're all allowed to channel our inner Verucca Salt once in a while

That is a beautiful part of our county too! Just too far away (about 5 hours 😂)

@JesusInTheCabbageVan

So tell me off or tell me if you’re in the same situation. Or tell me about your dream home purchase so I can live vicariously through you!

www.walesonline.co.uk/lifestyle/welsh-homes/remote-rural-renovation-project-valley-22863286

Can you buy this one so I can live vicariously through YOU? It's only 500k and so beautiful 😥

Ugh sorry, have fudge brain! Was replying to this link!

Thanks for all the practical advice too guys, I will face the music (played by my tiny violin) and dance!

Nah, 5 hours is fine!

I often joke about my first world problems

This falls into the category of "not even a problem".

When there are people literally living hand to mouth at the moment, I'd advise you to get a grip.

To the poster trying to save to get their kids on the ladder - I can imagine that is very hard and hope you get them on it soon, I know I’ve been fortunate to get on it, so apologies for an out of touch whinge!

5 hours but only half an hour in my helicopter! 😉

I will update this thread with any progress or maybe make a new one so I’m not associated with the Verrucca Salt level entitlement but I know you’ll all remember ha!

sounds like you are in the same position as most other people in that you want more than you can afford. there is always more out there that you cant afford no matter who you are so best try to either be grateful for what you have or try to find something you like better and can afford.

Yes 🙋

We bought a smaller house outright because we wouldn't have been able to get a mortgage when we first move home. We also thought we'd just be stopping here for a year.

Then Covid happened and we've now been here 3 years.

House prices have increased massively and while we can afford it, and I'm a bit reluctant to take on a mortgage.

We will have to move in the next 12 months though as dh and I are both WFH and dd1 and dd2 are sharing a room.

But now dh and I also can't agree on where to move to 🙄

This is basically us OP. I get it. Ludicrously high income, three kids (one BOGOF ), in a home which is lovely but that we’re fast outgrowing, and what is coming onto the market is just not for us. It’s the epitome of first world problems but here I am, living in the first world.

I dream of having problems like this

Oh some people in my boat - although I worded it very badly and rightly got my arse handed to me.

I know a lot of people talk about the problem of a credit society living beyond their means, which is why I wondered if anyone was doing opposite!

And yes I would agree re poster who says there is a tendency to always want a bit more then what you can afford. However in this case, we only bid on those two top of budget houses because there was a black hole in the market where no properties in the next lower price bracket in this area came up.

@SausagePourHomme

Maybe do some volunteering and get some perspective. This is not what i would call a problem.

Exactly!!! This is so out of touch,

You sound like someone who will never be happy. I have a friend who could have written your posts - she is now living in the house of her dreams (after years of moaning) but isn't any happier than she was before. Her dissatisfaction has remained exactly the same but has shifted to other areas.
I would work on being happy with what you have now, it's a life skill that will help you in all areas.

It also sounds like you can't afford the house you'd want in your area. You need to adjust your expectations imo.

Not quite the same but self employed DH needs to make some significant investment to his business. We have saved and borrowed enough capital to be able to do it but have hit a wall with actually getting it done due the the general difficulties in the construction industry so we’re in complete limbo and I can’t/won’t spend money on anything else until it’s done. It’s rubbish.
However I do agree with “the best is the enemy of good”. Did you ever see that grand designs where the man demolished a perfectly good 5 bed on the Devon coast to build a lighthouse inspired “luxury home” on the rocks? He bankrupted himself and it cost his marriage, but what he also did is take away his childrens potential lovely childhood in perfectly good 5 bed seconds from the beach and turn it into a stress fest where perfection was always just around the corner. If you can’t find the perfect home, then buy an imperfect “perfectly good” rural home with some land somewhere close to where you want to be and enjoy it.

When you get the rural country house that you deserve in the.middle.of nowhere, you will probably miss the feeling of relative security and neighbourship when you're being targeted by organised thieves, hearing things go bump in the night, the car breaks down and you can't get a mechanic out to the hospital appointment 50 miles away with no public transport ... Grass not always greener

I’m afraid your OP doesn’t come across well.

I understand. We have just moved after spending ten years in a house we bought as a "temporary measure". It was too small for us (two bed one reception) but it was perfect in many ways and made looking very difficult as other places didn't compare in terms of room size and location.

Husband and I also had radically different ideas of what we wanted in a new house.

For the sake of our family and as a wise move, we both compromised on what we deemed essential and found a property we agreed on.

I had to get myself out of the mentality of a house being the embodiment of my hopes, dreams and aspirations. Essentially it's a large box for living in. We now have four times the space and don't know what to do with ourselves. I actually miss our previous house even though it was completely unsuitable for our needs. I know my feelings are irrational and I know I have done the right thing in moving.

Maybe go on Location, Location, Location?