Neighbours using our driveway as a thoroughfare

[Notathoroughfare]

Our neighbour’s house has a front entrance on one street and a rear entrance on our street, which means their drive is directly adjacent to ours and he has a gate at the top of his to access his garden. It’s not a shared driveway. For some reason, they never use their front door and always use the rear as an entrance/exit for them and any guests.

Because his car is massive, it takes up the whole width of his drive, which means anyone entering or leaving their gate has to walk on our driveway and it’s really starting to piss me off. They drag their bins down our drive every week, use our drive to get in and out of their car and if our car isn’t parked on our drive, they will literally just walk straight across.

We did previously ask them not to do this as they were having work done and their workmen kept using our drive to get in and out of NDN’s garden as well as leaving stuff on it and sitting on it to have their lunch. He apologised and it stopped, but increasingly, anyone who visits them will walk up our drive to get to theirs.

We can’t put a fence up because it would mean their driveway was unusable - there’s a wall on the other side of it and their drive is literally only wide enough for their car. This would also be a pretty nuclear option and we don’t want to fall out with them as if we need to do any work to the side of our house, we need to use his sideway.

I really just want to discourage them and their guests using our drive as an extension of theirs. It sounds petty but it’s several times a day and they’ve even been known to go up the middle of our drive and squeeze between the front of our car and our window to get to the gate if our bins are in the way.

There’s no room for planters down the edge of the drive so the only thing I could really think of was creating a small bin store at the top of our drive which is right by their gate. We’re on civil terms with them but not particularly friendly and I’d rather not risk a row because I’m fairly sure he would think we were being unreasonable!

If anyone has any suggestions for deterrents I’d be interested to hear them. We can’t put gates or fences on our drive as there isn’t space. Land mines also not an option.

OP you absolutely have to get them to stop. We have a similar situation and the postman squeezes between 2 cars and has scratched one of ours with his bag. Luckily the doorbell captured it and we were able to speak to the sorting office manager about it, and get it rectified.
If one of those visitors or neighbours puts a nice scratch from a handbag/school bag or whatever down your car, you'll be kicking yourself for not doing something about it.

I’d just put up a fence if it’s bothering you that much. It’s not your problem if their drive isn’t big enough for their car.

I’d say fuck it and put a fence up, they can move their wall if they want. Having people walk past my living room window isn’t relaxing and I picked my house to not have this!

Can you put a partial fence up, joining onto your house but only going part way down your drive, like maybe 1.5 metres. Then they will still have room to open their car doors over your drive but their visitors won't walk past your windows anymore.

I know what you mean OP. I've delivered leaflets and our drives round here are small so sometimes I can't walk past a car on the house drive.

They really need to reconfigure their space including wall, gate etc. But why would they when they can keep using your drive. You'll have to have a hard discussion with them to say this, and agree a timescale. In the meantime you won't put a fence up. They do have options, including a smaller car.

I know it's hard, but try and keep it factual, calm and polite. It's the only way to resolve it.

That’s really CF behaviour. Definitely stop them with a fence.

So long as any fence is 100% on your land, they can't stop you, nor is it your problem whether their car fits on their driveway or not.

I'd agree with a fence or hedge part of the way down, so there is no access past your cars and windows.

If you put a fence up, would the neighbours still be able to access their drive by extending it on the other side or knocking down the wall? If so, that would seem to be the answer.

How do you want them to get to their house? Do you want them to not park on their drive? Just trying to work out what solution there is if not building a fence etc

What did you say when all the boxes and bags were there? Were you allBritish and 'Oh no, that's fine, thanks for moving them' or did you tell him it was really annoying you.

Do you know why they have such a massive car? Disabilities etc?

Given the set up I can see why it's the easiest option for them. But sadly that does mean until you stop it being the easiest options, nothing is going to change.

You're going to have to force it really. I think a fence that forces them to knock down their wall is the best option. No matter what you ask of them, it's always going to revert back to the easy option of using your drive as a right of way.

@Notathoroughfare

Diagram.

There is no space whatsoever between the drives. Both drives are gravel/paving.They can’t get their car through their gate because it’s too big (minibus type of vehicle) and their house is a terrace directly on the pavement at the front with double yellows on the road so they can’t park there.

Do they own the ‘non drive’ bit and/or the piece of land behind the wall?

If you put a fence/wall/planting on your drive couldn’t they extend their drive into the ‘non drive’ section?

Either way, it isn’t really your problem. Lots of people have drives which were built when cars were much smaller and so have to find alternative parking or amend it if possible.

Put an area of tubs in front of your house so he can't get all his car off the road.

@PattyPan

Do you know why they have such a massive car? Disabilities etc?

Most modern cars are just massive, aren’t they? Even so-called small cars: I hired a Mercedes A-class at the weekend, the smallest in the range, and it was almost as long and even wider than my 25-year-old campervan.

It must be one of the main causes of parking issues everywhere - older house driveways and car parks were designed with older smaller cars in mind and can’t properly accommodate what’s now considered a normal size car.

@ComtesseDeSpair OP said they have a minivan type vehicle so genuinely bigger than a standard car and an unusual choice unless they have loads of kids/need to fit in a wheelchair/etc

Put the fence up, it really isnt your problem if they cant get in and out of their minibus. They should have thought of that before buying the car.

You could talk to them first and tell them you're thinking of doing it and seeing if theyll stop doing it, but even if they do stop, theyll only start again as theyve already shown you. Save yourself the aggro and do it asap

I’m not sure why they have a large car is relevant anyway, owning one isn’t illegal. Obviously it doesn’t give the OP’s neighbour the right to spill over onto her property but the reason for ownership is by the by. They have it, it doesn’t fit in their designated parking area.

This would annoy me so much it’s the constant traipsing up and down our drive by their visitors which irritates me, especially when they walk between our cars up the middle of the drive then squeeze between the car and our front window to get to NDN’s gate
I would speak to them again and say you have asked them not to use your drive at all but they are still doing it. Just because you aren't home doesn't give them the right to use it. Just because your car isn't on it doesn't give them the right to use it.
They either need to rearrange how their drive and gateway works so people don't need to go on your drive and walk right in front of your window, or you will have to look at putting in a fence to keep them separate. What happens if a visitor scratches your car when squeezing by it? You wouldn't be able to prove they did it and you would be the one having to find the money to repair it.
It doesn't need to become a big thing. As the saying goes good fences make for good neighbours. Good luck op

You don't need to wall the whole length of the drive, just block the bit near the gate.
It only needs to be long enough for them to not be able to get in front of NDN's car.

Even a long planter with trellis might do the job.. particularly if you go for something nice in a thorn bush/berberis.

@Forrandomposts

How do you want them to get to their house? Do you want them to not park on their drive? Just trying to work out what solution there is if not building a fence etc

I thought about this when I wrote my previous post and couldn't think of an answer, but ultimately, it's not the OP's problem and she'd probably be better off staying out of any solution hunting.

Primrose do good large, long and narrow planters (trough types in varying heights). I have a couple of tall ones which screen off a section of garden, they’re really useful.

The part on your diagram that says gate, in front of their car, is that a fence? Why can't they take that down and drive further into their drive next to your house not next to your drive

Hang on - why don't the visitors just go in through the front door? Isn't that the obvious answer? My mum had a similar situation in the town she used to live in, but the front door was still available for use, just not the usual one.