So, I live right next door to my ILs, MIL and FIL and little SIL. We’ve had our fair share of disagreements about how much space and privacy is needed (aka calling and visiting and controlling too much) but I’ve started taking matters into my own hands and need a little help.
They own the land we’re on but not the home (they actually were going to sell my husband the land, but took back the offer after we’d bought the home on it and moved in, because they ‘don’t trust us not to sell it’). The true reason (i think because it has been heavily implied) is they want to own it when we have kids so they have say in whether we get a fence and can come when they please. That, and, it gives them a reason to come over to get things, feed their pets, and a place to store anything that’s not pretty enough for their new yard like trash and broken outdoor toys.
Obviously I don’t like this and have made an effort of respectfully cleaning the place up, but I still feel have no space and privacy and a little left over betrayal from the bait and switch they pulled.
That aside, I’m trying to find ways to create space and privacy without slighting them. I’m not allowed a fence, to move things like their dog houses, to use the storage buildings, but I’ve been working to make the space more my own and private so maybe they’ll come around and finally move out their things like they’d promised a lot. And yes, they do build new things down here that make it hard to separate our lives like a trash trailer for their trash to wait to be towed off. Truth is, they don’t use the things they store down here regularly like they did when they themselves lived here, so I think it’s just a hard headed refusal to give into the requests of a dead feud.
But, I’ve attempted by adding a gate to my front porch so SIL and pets won’t run on it, a small fence separating the swing set and driveway for both SIL’s safety and a little division of yards, and a secluded sitting area. I’ve also organized as much of their things that I could in a central area. Im running out of ideas to respectfully create the space and privacy i need and would love opinions and recommendations— what do I do? Am I being silly? If you experienced this, how did you cope? Living close is maddening enough without them in my day to day (which they try to be haha).