Getting the ‘feel’ about the right house - am I the only one who gets this?

[Finallybroody]

I’m in the process of house hunting. We’ve only viewed 3 houses, all within our price range but none of them did I get the right ‘feel’ about, although DP liked 2 out of the 3.

I can’t quite explain what I mean about the ‘feel’. I’ve had it twice before when finding previous houses, and pounced on those.

I like it to feel clean and cared for, with neutral decor and lots of natural light.

DP is getting frustrated with me because I can’t articulate what I don’t like about the houses exactly. I am willing to overlook old boilers, tired bathrooms/kitchens… but it has to feel right.

Am I alone in this? Properties in our budget are so hard to come by right now and I’m stressing I won’t view one which gives me that feeling that says I belong there.

No, you’re not alone, I get it and have done for houses that don’t even tick all the boxes. Like others, though, I’ve had that feeling of wrongness that has stopped me going beyond the entrance hallway. Revulsion isn’t too strong a word for it. I’m not normally reactive or emotional in that way, so the first (and strongest) time it happened it really surprised me.

I think this is true!!

We moved house when I was 20, following my parents divorce. I only went to see 2 houses with my mum, and when we got in the car after the second one, I told my mum that that was our house - and we got it, even though we didn't make the highest offer! The sellers liked us and thought we would fit in well with the neighbours.

We don’t choose houses, OP, houses choose us. I knew my current home was “ours” as soon as DH showed me the particulars from the estate agent.
When the survey turned up a potential issue and we decided to pull out, I was thrown and puzzled - “but it’s the one, I know it is!”
Fortunately, a second specialist opinion rejected the survey findings and we went ahead. I’m still here nearly forty years later.

I understand. We have just started looking for a new home. We have also viewed three houses. I can tell if we are going to like house once we drive up to the property.
One house gave me that feeling until we walked up the stairs to the front door and noticed there was a children’s playground right next to the back garden fence. This was a deal breaker. We were gutted.
We could wait to get out of the other two properties

Absolutely normal but something that’s hard to explain to someone who doesn’t feel the same.

I saw a house recently after falling in love with it on rightmove. It was perfect on paper in a lovely location but as soon as I walked in I knew it wasn’t right.

Our current house was in a mess when we bought it but it just felt right straight away. It’s a shame we have to move for school catchment area reasons!

I get this, we only viewed my home as there was not many in the area we wanted on our price range. The photos made it look none appealing. We stepped in and it was like we were at home we offered full asking price straight away and thankfully it was taken. Houses were going over the asking but the vendor wanted the house to go to us. And yes the Christmas tree is where I planned during the viewing.

I get the feel but to discount a house because of decor is a bit short sighted .. those things can be changed , location and garden size cannot !

It's normal but it's not necessarily a factor I'd put a huge amount of stock in. How can you be sure that you are not being influenced by something as fleeting as better weather, or a better mood, or a fuller stomach or a smell that you prefer in the house or a more organised and tidier householder when you cross the threshold?

If I had two good prospects on paper and you were looking for a nudge one way or the other then a gut feel is as good as another factor but you at least need to put that gut feeling under a lense and make sure it isn't false confidence.

We bought our first home a few years ago and i know exactly what you mean. I basically walked in and it just felt right, like home.

Yes, totally understand. I was talking to someone in the hairdressers the other day who said they were buying a flat based solely on viewing it via an online video. It’s out of the local area, they haven’t seen it in the flesh and won’t until they’ve completed. I was horrified.

Dds and I had ‘the feel’ about both their current houses, but it had nothing to do with decor. They were clean and evidently cared for, but both were very dated.

It was the lovely warm atmosphere (I don’t mean the temperature) which felt as if they had been happy family homes.

Some of the ‘smarter’ houses we looked had none of that.

We bought once without the "feeling". We lived there for twelve years but never connected with the house. I saw our present house online and could have bought it without going to see it. It was my house. We have been here almost seven years and I love it as much now as I did then.

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER

Dds and I had ‘the feel’ about both their current houses, but it had nothing to do with decor. They were clean and evidently cared for, but both were very dated.

It was the lovely warm atmosphere (I don’t mean the temperature) which felt as if they had been happy family homes.

Some of the ‘smarter’ houses we looked had none of that.

Ours looked comprehensively fucked and unloved when we viewed it — it was a marital home being sold after a long drawn out and contentious divorce, and had only been lived in by the couples’ children and their friends for years, and had not been maintained at all, on top of 160 years of DIY botch jobs. And the garden had waist-high briars and huge amounts of buried junk. But there was a lovely house under all the crap and neglect.