Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Property/DIY

Join our Property forum for renovation, DIY, and house selling advice.

Original poster

New neighbours want us to go halves on a new fence. AIBU to say No?

41 replies

Walkingtheplank · 27/02/2021 13:15

We've been in our house for 10 years.

Our neighbour was a lovely old man with a very unkempt garden with a ramshackle fence between us. I believe it belonged to next door but we paid to have it replaced as neighbour didnt see value in a new fence which he couldn't see thoug his overgrown garden.

He has since moved on and we have new neighbours. Last year during lockdown we had their neighbours doubling the size of the house. The builders were awful, using the fence as a urinal and in parts have built their patio under my fence, damaging the fence and killing my plants. In the spirit of good neighbourly relations I've said nothing about this (builders were their relatives).

Now the new neighbours, who seem friendly, want us to go halves on a new fence when the existing one is fine as it is - not great as its 10 years old but fine enough).

I don't want to pay as
a) as far as I know, it's not our responsibility. I think it is their fence.
b) it's not a pressing need
c) I dont want to pay their family to build it - the wooden side gate they made is a travesty
d) I have plants on our side that might be damaged - and was about to buy new ones to replace the ones killed by their builder last year.

To put in financial context, we're broke. DH was unemployed for most of last year and our current outgoings exceed our income. I'm looking to stop my self-employed work that fitted around the children and applying for less flexible salaried roles to improve our situation. Currently debating whether we can afford for DD to have dental braces which we just missed NHS qualification for.
The new plants I was about to buy were going to be the first 'extra' thing I bought for me in a year. Had to scrape by eeking out the existing seeds I had last year whilst obnoxious builders destroyed any semblance of it being a nice place to be last year during lockdown.

I've told DH to say no but he clearly wants to keep the peace with the neighbours. On their other side they've got a high garish orange-ish high fence as opposed to our silvered not too high fence.

I guess my question is would it be so outrageous to decline to share the cost? Would you think very badly of neighbours who declined? And would you punish them by putting up a monstrous fence as punishment?

OP posts:
Original poster
Walkingtheplank · 27/02/2021 13:19

Apologies for no paragraphs. I did write it in nice paragraphs.

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 27/02/2021 13:20

Is there any way of finding out who owns the fence? If it does belong to them, just tell them you can't afford it. End of.

milinhas · 27/02/2021 13:22

You are under no obligation to share the cost at all - it’s functional and you can’t afford it right now. Just say no. They may still replace it with something ugly without your involvement though if it’s their boundary so maybe wait to buy more plants ...

PatchworkElmer · 27/02/2021 13:22

If it’s their fence, it’s their responsibility. I think you’d be mad to contribute if you don’t consider it a priority- if you wanted it to be changed and considered it ‘worth it’ to go halves to get the fence you wanted, that would be a different matter.

AuditAngel · 27/02/2021 13:25

It’s easy to check if you own the fence by reading the deeds. You can get a copy from the land registry for a few pounds.

StepawayfromtheBiscuittin · 27/02/2021 13:29

Their fence, their cost. Given your circumstances it doesn't seem like a good use of funds at the moment. Just say to them that your understanding is the fence is theirs (although given you replaced last one it may not be?) and that either way you aren't in a position to shell out for half a fence just now.
Good luck with your work OP.

morninglive · 27/02/2021 13:31

Generally speaking if you stand at the back of the house and look out, the fence on the left belongs to you and you are responsible for its upkeep, the fence on the right belongs to your neighbour. I should say boundary, as it can be a wall etc. So if its there fence they pay all costs, if its yours and you are happy with it, it can be left.

justanotherneighinparadise · 27/02/2021 13:35

Have you any receipts to show you paid for the last fence and when that was done? I think
I would show them that you have paid out for the fence once and seeing that it’s not particularly old and still standing, plus your current financial situation, you are not prepared to pay out for it again.

My concern about your husband saying he is happy for it to be replaced as long as the cost is there’s (which it sounded like he would agree to) is the possibility of a land grab alongside a new fence. If their patio is already over the boundary of your land the likelihood of a new fence sitting further into your garden is high. So I would want to make them acutely aware that you will be watching where the new fence posts are being put and expect the new fence to sit on the boundary of the old fence.

RampantIvy · 27/02/2021 13:36

Interestingly, looking out at the back, our left hand neighbours replaced their fence, and we replaced the fence to our right.

Cherryup · 27/02/2021 13:37

I had a note put through my door a few years ago asking us to go halves on a new fence.

We had just done the other side which is ours and hadn't asked for a contribution from those neighbours and I'd just gone on maternity leave, so I apologised and said at this time we're not in a position to make a contribution.

It was never mentioned again and they put up the new fence a few months later. They asked their other side too who also said no. Perhaps if they were nicer neighbours we'd have all said yes.

justanotherneighinparadise · 27/02/2021 13:37

@morninglive

Generally speaking if you stand at the back of the house and look out, the fence on the left belongs to you and you are responsible for its upkeep, the fence on the right belongs to your neighbour. I should say boundary, as it can be a wall etc. So if its there fence they pay all costs, if its yours and you are happy with it, it can be left.
This gets said so often and it’s really not ‘generally’ true. This house and our last house both had no boundary ownership stipulated on the deeds. It was up to both houses to agree it was either shared or one side to own the fence as they were happy to fund it.
LimaFoxtrotCharlie · 27/02/2021 13:38

if you stand at the back of the house and look out, the fence on the left belongs to you and you are responsible for its upkeep, the fence on the right belongs to your neighbour
It’s the other way round for us, we own the fence on the right.
Either way, there is no legal requirement to have a fence so the house that wants a new fence should be prepared to pay for it.

justanotherneighinparadise · 27/02/2021 13:40

@Cherryup

I had a note put through my door a few years ago asking us to go halves on a new fence.

We had just done the other side which is ours and hadn't asked for a contribution from those neighbours and I'd just gone on maternity leave, so I apologised and said at this time we're not in a position to make a contribution.

It was never mentioned again and they put up the new fence a few months later. They asked their other side too who also said no. Perhaps if they were nicer neighbours we'd have all said yes.

Our neighbours did similar but we didn’t want the fence replaced nor did we want to half fund it. So we said it could only be replaced if both sides were in agreement or else they could put a fence the other side of the fence that was already standing.

They tried to bully us with some nonsense their solicitor told them and gave us a certain amount of time to respond and we just ignored them. Funnily enough the fence still stands.

Original poster
Walkingtheplank · 27/02/2021 13:43

Have just looked at the deeds and there is no indication of who owns what.

Good point on the land grab. A fencing company could quite reasonably assume the extent of the patio is to be contained by the fence. It's just a few inches but would narrow our side passage.

I've got an established passionflower that stretches along c.20ft of the fence. Will be gutted to have that cut down.

OP posts:
Potentialscrooge · 27/02/2021 13:48

Just say no thank you, if you want a new fence you add a fence your side.
If they question more you just tell them you bought the last one and won’t be buying a new one.
If they get defensive you then share the builders behaviour and the fact it’s been built under and that’s damage they have caused.
Any continuation just disengage. Be polite and friendly but let that be the end.

Notaroadrunner · 27/02/2021 13:50

Just tell them you are happy with the fence that is there and say no. No need to mention that you cannot afford it. That's none of their business.

SmudgeButt · 27/02/2021 13:52

No. Just no.

if it's their fence they have to pay for it. if it's your fence and you are happy with it for now (or forever) then it doesn't need to be replaced.

if they aren't happy with you saying no they are quite entitled to build another fence on their property. at their expense.

GuyFawkesDay · 27/02/2021 13:52

Ask them to erect their fence on their side of the boundary as you had your garden damaged by the builder and leave it at that.

We went splits with neighbours (it was their fence and rotten) but we were replacing the others anyway so they contributed to getting the shared section done at the same time.

pilates · 27/02/2021 13:56

If you have a plan with copies of your deeds, it should shown an inward mark of a“T” which shows you are responsible for that side. When you purchased you should have been told by your solicitor what you are responsible for. If the deeds are silent, I would assume it’s joint. Just say sorry you are not in a financial position to contribute towards the fence.

Veuvestar · 27/02/2021 13:59

I think if you refuse to split it, you have no control over what they put there.
If you split it, you can get involved on what type of fence it is. I’d hate to rely on my neighbours tastes.

haggisandmarsbar · 27/02/2021 14:06

@Walkingtheplank

Have just looked at the deeds and there is no indication of who owns what.

Good point on the land grab. A fencing company could quite reasonably assume the extent of the patio is to be contained by the fence. It's just a few inches but would narrow our side passage.

I've got an established passionflower that stretches along c.20ft of the fence. Will be gutted to have that cut down.

In that case I would write to them and say a) it is my fence b) I do not agree to it being replaced because I have an established garden and do not intend to see it damaged by work on a fence that is serviceable.

Our passionflower just got killed off by frost Sad

Allgirlskidsanddogs · 27/02/2021 14:06

I completely understand why you don’t want to contribute and are concerned about the landgrab but if you do pay something you also maintain some control.

I would get the neighbours around to your garden and explain your concerns where they can see the issues.

Aknifewith16blades · 27/02/2021 14:06

No need for you to go with their choice of builders for the fence - you could offer to pay a different supplier.

As you own the current fence, you could let them put up their own inside their boundary, leaving yours in place.

Also, if a new fence is going in, maybe ask them to fix the patio at the same time?

justanotherneighinparadise · 27/02/2021 14:07

@Veuvestar

I think if you refuse to split it, you have no control over what they put there. If you split it, you can get involved on what type of fence it is. I’d hate to rely on my neighbours tastes.
That’s not true. They only have a right to pull the fence down if they own it. If neither side own the fence then it is shared and one side needs the others agreement to replace it. What they are entitled to do is erect a fence on their side of the boundary. That’s completely fine.
Covidcorvid · 27/02/2021 14:12

If the deeds don’t say who’s responsible for it and you paid for it I’d say that makes it your fence. So not only would I be declining their offer of going halves I’d also be telling them not to touch my fence.

They can put their own fence up if they want their side of your fence. No land grab issues and your clematis will be safe.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.