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Original poster

Relocating for school?

61 replies

SeaSunbeach · 25/02/2021 23:24

We have just accepted an offer for an excellent school for my child which is 50 minutes drive away, or more than one hour in bad traffic. DD is quite young to be travelling by herself. Given that the school run is going to be super stressful we are considering relocating and renting out our lovely house and renting close to school. We don’t want to sell because we would like to return to the house and our area in six years when she finishes the school.
According to my calculations after paying tax etc we will be able afford a fairly decent apartment close to school. It sounds ok on the surface but I can’t bear the thought of someone ruining my nice house and having to pay for redecoration. Has anyone done this before: renting out your place to move for the school?

OP posts:

Midlifephoenix · 25/02/2021 23:41

I have. Have to say after someone else lived in my house I never felt the same about it, regardless of how well they looked after it. I ended up selling and buying an investment flat elsewhere that made me more money and that I had no emotional attachment to (and I'm not moving back to that area - you can't predict where you'll want to be several years from now).

Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 25/02/2021 23:47

@Midlifephoenix
Thank you for sharing your experience. That is exactly what I am afraid of, house becoming completely different. At this point we love living in it so much, and perhaps also because it was such a safe place for us during the lockdown. Would hate selling it, and in this market may not get the fair price as well.

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deathbollywood · 26/02/2021 02:11

it's called school admissions fraud your rental would not be considered your permanent address and they would use your owned property address

heatherhoneys · 26/02/2021 02:19

@deathbollywood

it's called school admissions fraud your rental would not be considered your permanent address and they would use your owned property address

I don't think it would be fraud because their Dd already has the place based on their current address further away. They are moving closer.

Gemma2019 · 26/02/2021 02:45

Are you sure there are no suitable schools within decent commuting distance to your current house? It would be such a shame to give up somewhere you love to live in an apartment for six years.

We did move for a school - I didn't rent out my house as it was my dream house and I couldn't face the idea of it being all ruined and then having to return to it but sold it instead and bought one nearer to the school. The school turned out to be totally unsuitable for my DS, so a total waste and I do regret moving.

heatherhoneys · 26/02/2021 03:50

@Gemma2019

Are you sure there are no suitable schools within decent commuting distance to your current house? It would be such a shame to give up somewhere you love to live in an apartment for six years.

I thought, there's no way I'd give up a house to live in a flat.

custardbear · 26/02/2021 04:16

I'd be extremely concerned about a child travelling effectively 2 hours alone each day - is there a school bus or is it public transport? Or have I misunderstood and you'll be driving her?

Ducksurprise · 26/02/2021 04:25

@custardbear

I'd be extremely concerned about a child travelling effectively 2 hours alone each day - is there a school bus or is it public transport? Or have I misunderstood and you'll be driving her?

This is really common if you live rurally although there are school buses. Have a look at the distance covered by children going to super selective schools. Op I'd see how it goes, as pp said you might not like the school.

Cattitudes · 26/02/2021 06:25

I am guessing a private school if you have accepted already as state school offers not out yet. A few options- could you get a job in the school location so you have something to do there and save a two way commute? Or in non covid times find a work hub to work from rather than wfh. Are there any public transport options? Or somewhere nearer that you can drop her to - say 20 min drive to train then 40 min train journey. She may seem too young now, but in three or four years she will not seem as young, so you could be looking for a 2-3 year solution not a 7yr solution. Does the school have an occasional border option? Some schools will let day borders sometimes board for additional fees, so you could maybe drop her off Monday, she boards Mon and Tues night, pick her up Wed then Thur and Fri you work somewhere near school for example. Are there likely to be younger siblings attending there in the future? I hope she enjoys her new school.

Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 08:47

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and advice.
The school is private and selective and we are happy DC got in. So going in another school is not an option. Of course we never know if she likes it or not, in which case we would be glad we all if we stay in this house. They don’t have boarding unfortunately so that’s not an option @Cattitudes. I wish they did. @custardbear She can either a very long journey changing the public bus and walking or I can driver her.

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Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 08:49

That’s a very good point @Gemma2019, as I would hate moving and selling and then realizing the school is not a good fit for us. Also, in just six years my dc will go off to university anyway.

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chloechloe · 26/02/2021 09:21

Private schools often have privately run school buses taking kids home in numerous directions. At my school they covered commutes up to about 40 -50 minutes. Could you drive her part way to one of the pick up points? Unfortunately I lived fairly close to school so had to take the city bus - I was jealous of all my friends taking the school bus as they seemed to have loads of fun going to and from school!

If you do rent, I would perhaps wait to see how well she settles in. We rented our own home after moving abroad and had no plans to return. Even if you have great tenants, it is still a PITA as they expect you to fix the tiniest thing straight away. I would therefore factor in the cost of getting a management company to arrange repairs and carry out checks etc. That would also help you have some distance from the fact you have somebody living in your home. Factor in as well that you’ll have to redecorate again afterwards, although you could sell it to yourself as a nice project to do!

custardbear · 26/02/2021 10:55

Everyone is different, but for me I'd be looking at what my priority was here to be frank. Would you trust the world we live in for a child to be travelling alone at such a young age? Can you commit to driving her, so 4 hours journey? Can you get a job near the school so it's two birds with one stone?
In all honesty I'd be terrified to leave a child to get themselves such a long way there and home, often in the dark if you're in the UK, think things through and prioritise

user88899 · 26/02/2021 11:14

The one thing I'd be mindful of is "just 6 years" is pretty much half your DD's (conscious) childhood. You'd be completely downgrading your quality of life for a substantial part of your family life. What will her teen years be like in a rented flat vs what you can provide in your home now? What space would she have for herself and for socialising with friends?

Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 13:32

Thank you so much for wonderful advice and excellent points @custardbear @user88899
@chloechloe @Gemma2019 @Cattitudes @Ducksurprise @heatherhoneys

Regarding the journey, there is no way she is making it on her own. We are definitely not letting her do it as it is not safe. That’s why we are thinking of moving. The problem is that although the area is one hour drive from us, I would not want to stay there for life. I think if we rent close to school we should be able afford a nice place with a decent room for my daughter and hopefully she will be able to see her friends more.

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emmathedilemma · 26/02/2021 13:41

How old is she? For secondary school age i think it's quite normal to go to school alone on public transport but younger probably not. I have friends with kids who go a similar distance to private schools and they have friends who live 40-60 minutes in the opposite direction from school so weekends can really be spent driving to play dates and parties which are miles away!

Unfucked · 26/02/2021 13:52

My parents did this - I was a day girl 11-13 and then boarded at 13. It wasn’t great for my father though, who was then doing the commute in reverse, and whose day was much longer than my school day. With WFH that’s probably less of a problem these days. Are there other siblings? What about their schools?

Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 13:53

@emmathedilemma she is starting a secondary school and I would love her to be close to her friends so she can meet on the weekends

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Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 13:54

No other siblings, and me and my husband are both working from home at the moment, and most probably will work from home for the next four five years..

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Sprig1 · 26/02/2021 13:58

Why don't you sell the current house (once you are sure she is settled in school), buy closer to the school and then if you still want to them buy another house back in the old area once she has finished school. So much can change over that period of time that you may not want to move back there anyway once the time comes.

Unfucked · 26/02/2021 14:05

If you love your current house then the transaction costs of buying and selling twice are huge, so I can understand why you’re contemplating it.

My parents rented until they knew I was happy at the school and happy to be a boarder. If boarding isn’t an option it’s a lot of upheaval and a lot of pressure to put on the child.

Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 14:06

@Sprig1 that’s definitely one of the options. The problem with that is that we don’t like the market at the moment and don’t want to sell cheap. Plus all the stamp duty charges to pay again.

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Original poster

SeaSunbeach · 26/02/2021 14:09

@Unfucked that’s probably a good idea.. we will rent until we know the are happy in that area and she is happy in the school. Plus, that area is completely new to me. I don’t know anyone who lives there etc.

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Unfucked · 26/02/2021 14:14

I’ve just realised you’d be renting out your own house - my parents kept hold of theirs, and we returned at weekends and holidays. It would have made friendships awkward in a day school, but as lots of girls lived further afield it was great to have school friends to stay.

I wonder if you’re being too precious about this (I have an only child too, so understand). By the time she’s 12 or 13 a long commute on public transport that she’s doing daily with friends will be a hoot. She’ll love it. In your shoes I’d suck up the pain for a year. Drive to school, work in a library or cafe nearby, come home again. Indie school terms are so short it would probably only be 26 or so weeks.

Unfucked · 26/02/2021 14:20

A new home and a new school together is a big ask for an 11 year old, particularly if the new house is actually a flat (perhaps with no outside space) and therefore not as comfortable as the old family home.

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