Have you ever 'fallen in love' with a house?

[carrottbaton]

We lost out on our dream house recently in a bidding war. The house was not perfect, but because I'd completely fallen for it it seems perfect in my memory. I'm feeling incredibly down about it and pessimistic about finding another house that I like as much. It's all made me feel like I've gone quite mad tbh. So my question is - how easy is it to fall in love with bricks and mortar?

Disclaimer. Before anyone says - I know this is very much a first world problem, and I think my feelings have been heightened by an extremely tough year and the recent loss of my dad.

I fell in love with this house when I walked through the door in October 2008.

So sorry to hear what you've been through, you must be feeling really downcast.

Let me reassure you the exact same thing happened to DH over a house we were both hoping to buy. DH properly "fell in love" whereas I just thought it'd probably be quite nice to get it.

Needless to say we didn't get it after all. DH was absolutely crushed I got worried for him and it was hard trying to stay optimistic. I think it was the initial thinking "oh this could be ours" and almost planning around it first, only for it not to be so that made it harder than say, if we knew we weren't in with a chance to begin with.

Fast forward to a year later! An even better house came up. We got it.

So despair not, DH is completely over that other house. Just hang in there. It's a big event and it's easy to get caught up in emotions.

I have a house that got away when our sale fell through. It was my dream house and perfectly decorated to my tastes too. But I love the house we bought in the end and it just needs updating and it will be even better than the first one.

I'm very sorry for your loss carrottbaton.

DH and I fell in love with one house. As with a pp, we didn't get it and ended up somewhere better. So hang in there.

Thanks all. This gives me hope!

Since the last exchange with the estate agent I've felt the lowest I think I ever have. I'd thought this house meant the start of new things for us.

We've sold ours, been looking for a year and the buyers are getting impatient so there is a need to get back on the horse ASAP but the last thing I want to do is trawl Rightmove right now.

I know exactly what you mean, the house we really wanted was took off the market as they decided to stay put was absolutely gutted, we still are nut hoping I can trust in fate and something better will come along.

Sorry for your sad loss. Buying a house is very stressful so dont apologise xx

Your buyers have been waiting a year?

I've also been there OP. Fell head over heels with a really unusual house - put in an offer but were outbid.

I felt so so low about it - really upset. But it did focus our minds about moving (from London to Cornwall). I was really dispirited as I have really specific house 'wants' and was sure we would find it hard to get another one. Both DP and I feel very very strongly about houses the second we step through the door and very few make us get excited.

However, about 9 months later another house came up - actually far more perfect than the first, and much nearer my parents. Fell in love with it from first stepping through the door. We've been in for 5 months now and I absolutely love it. I'm really glad the first house didn't pan out as it wouldn't have enabled the lifestyle we now have.

Can you sell and move into rented for a bit? The market is likely to drop a bit so you might not really lose out financially, if it's going to keep your sale intact.

Where are you looking and what is your budget? MNers love a bit of Rightmove window shopping.

OP it took us 5 attempts to get into the house we're in now. We fell in love with the previous 4 too but lost out for various reasons or the sale fell through. So I know how it feels to be in your position and it's awful, I remember feeling like I'd never find a house I loved as much as house 1/2/3/4.

Good luck OP with your search, house hunting is hard

Aue OP. Let's commiserate. I had a house I loved and had to pull out because it turned out to have issues. I will be very unlikely to find something similar. Not impossible, but very unlikely. It has one feature I'll mourn over forever. I feel like I'm over houses now and will never love again! The truth is something different but as good in other ways is likely to turn up. I don't think there's anything unusual in how you're feeling and I wish you all the best.

Yes we fell in love with the first house we bought but missed out to start with, then it fell through and came back on the market and we snapped it up.

We recently moved again and missed out on a lovely house in a 'best and final' bid....but an even better one came onto the market and I'm currently sitting in our new living room feeling very happy. So wait and see what comes onto the market!

I fell in love with the house I'm we're in but never imagined it could be ours.

It did become ours and we often stand in the place on the landing where we chatted to the estate agent and where we both silently thought 'in love but no chance'

Still can't believe it's ours.

Although, I will say 'in love' and 'dream house' are two separate entities.

Dream for me would be problem/diy free. But I suppose that's what you get in an old house.

Yes, I’ve had this feeling about a house, but with hindsight I realise that it was a crush 😂

I viewed a nice house that was move in ready (just needed new paint and curtains). At the time I had a newborn and toddler and just wanted a home after moving from overseas.

I put in an offer without DH seeing the house, as he would have been fine with my choice. We were cash buyers living in rented and able to move quickly. They refused to accept our offer without DH viewing (not because of the money, but because they thought I couldn’t make my own decision 🤨). DH wasn’t available until that following weekend due to work travel. In the meantime (2 days after my rejected offer) they accepted an offer for 0.5% more from a mortgage buyer in a chain.

I was really upset. Considered gazumping, but decided against. I’d mentally moved into the house and chosen how we’d decorate it etc. Felt upset for a month until we viewed the house we actually bought.

A few days after having our offer accepted on our current new house, the first EA came back to me to say that the chain on my “dream” house had broken, they wanted to now accept my offer!!! Too late, as I’d already made a different decision.

Anyway, that “dream” house is a 5 min walk from our new house and I now know that it would have been a mistake to buy it...the garden is too small, it’s on the corner of a rat run next to the local primary school, there’s zero visitor parking due to location. I’m really pleased now that we didn’t buy it.

There will be other houses OP. Hindsight in a great thing. Good luck with the search!

I fell in love with our house when we first came to look round. Got a tight feeling in my chest and just felt like a really physical reaction. We thought we’d lost it when someone else offered more and I went through a mourning period and adjusted to ‘settling’ for another house that was suitable but no love factor. Second house fell through and first one came back on market. It did feel ‘meant to be’ .

I love our new house. It needs so much work, but I love it. I’m not even sure why, as DH definitely doesn’t love it and wants to sell and move somewhere that’s already renovated 😂 I know it’ll be amazing once we’ve done our renovation this summer 🤩

It's definitely possible as I have twice.

The first was when I was a teen and house hunting with my parents for a new family home and we all fell in love with it, they still live there now.

The second was with DH trying to buy our first home together, we were completely in love with it but unfortunately the place we were in couldn't sell and so we were unable to buy it. The house we eventually bought wasn't one I was in love with but could see the huge potential. Think back now our lives would have been very different had we bought the house we loved and I am now glad we didn't buy it.

@Yafilthyanimal

Your buyers have been waiting a year?

No. We accepted their offer just before Christmas.

Yes, the one we're in. It's needed a fair bit of tlc and we could spend tens of thousands on it, still, but it has the same effect on a lot of people who visit.

I fell in love with a house. When I was getting ready for our first viewing I had the same butterfly feelings and shaky hands that you might get on a first date with someone seriously hot that you'd never spoken to before.
Totally crazy. I even did my make-up and chose my outfit as if I wanted to impress the house! ( ok this sounds weird now I've written down).

I absolutely love my apartment in London. Since I was a child I always wanted to live in Central London in a mansion flat - the big rooms, the high ceilings. I love the fact that I can be at Piccadilly or Oxford Street in 10-15 minutes (pre lockdown). It was bought by chance - I had been away, went past on the bus, saw the for sale sign and put in an offer. DH saw it the day before we completed.

Yes! We were looking for a while and must have seen 30+ houses but I only fell in love with one of them. Just got such a good feeling and loved everything about it. My dh wasn't so keen - he's a lot more practical and head over heart. We did put in an offer under asking and didn't get it but in retrospect it really wasn't right in terms of location, on the corner of a busy road which had some problems with people congregating, no good schools nearby. We are in a much more suitable house now but I definitely didn't fall in love with it in that way.

We saw a house my DP fell in love with and we lost it through a bidding war.. but a month later a better one came along and we got it. Glad we lost the first one as the garden was not as good.

Yes, but it was a rental flat. OMG, that kitchen! I still dream of it, and the view. Landlord didn't accept pets and we had two cats. I still think about it!