Have you ever 'fallen in love' with a house?

[carrottbaton]

We lost out on our dream house recently in a bidding war. The house was not perfect, but because I'd completely fallen for it it seems perfect in my memory. I'm feeling incredibly down about it and pessimistic about finding another house that I like as much. It's all made me feel like I've gone quite mad tbh. So my question is - how easy is it to fall in love with bricks and mortar?

Disclaimer. Before anyone says - I know this is very much a first world problem, and I think my feelings have been heightened by an extremely tough year and the recent loss of my dad.

The first was when I was a teen and house hunting with my parents for a new family home and we all fell in love with it, they still live there now.

Same except my parents were gazumped. I still look at it sometimes and it's still as lovely as when I first saw it 40 years ago.

I fell in love with one that was in California and $33million.
In a more realistic situation we were about to put our house on the market and saw what for us would have been the perfect house.
It went within the day.

Yes, desperately, twice - but they were impossible, because they were far too expensive.

@Yafilthyanimal

Your buyers have been waiting a year?

When we sold a deceased parent's house, the buyer's waited for a year for reasons too ridiculous to go into.

They wouldn't have waited longer than that mind you.

I viewed a lovely 1930's flat years ago...had all the original bathroom and kitchen and even old furnture all included....but the process dragged on for over a year and unpaid bills kept popping up relating to the roof etc so i finally walked away and friends then tried to buy it with more delays so they left it also...but do really like my house i have been in for over 25 years now.

I only fall in love with houses out of my price bracket!

Yes and I cried because as lovely as it was, it just wasn't the house for us but it was so sweet and when I drive past it now it makes me smile. It wouldn't have been any good for us at all but I literally fell head over heels. The house we bought a week later is the one we are in now and it's beautiful , has every we need and I love it but I still think of the other one now and then.

I did .A house we rented in the U.S. A quirky wooden framed house in blue with a wonderful garden .We had to move out when the owners came back from their stint abroad .We visited the area a few years later again and the house had been torn down and replaced by a McMansion.I still have the photos though.

Yes, until I went for a second view and it became obvious how much money needed spending on it. Things I thought were in good nick, were not.

I fell in love with the house we’re in now.. but now 3 years later I hate it. It didn’t take that long for the cracks to show.. literally.

We’re paying off as much as poss until fix ends and DC need to start school then selling up.

Yes I did and the buyer took it off the market. I resolved never to let this happen again

Yup I've resolved never to let my heart get ahead of my head again, the fall out if it doesn't work is too difficult. It has felt similar to a breakup!!

Yes we all fell totally in love with this one including the cat who purred everywhere as soon as she moved in. We thought we'ld lost it to another bidder a day earlier but then we got back in touch with estate agent and they said deal hadn't been agreed so we raised our offer to asking price and was accepted. And now we live here and love it.

I do think you can love more than one house though and it is worth waiting for the one you love if that's viable. I would move into rental if needed. I think with the news stamp duty may be extended and spring starting before too more may come on market so hopefully there'll be something else you love soon.

Sorry about your dad, I lost my mum last month and it has left me in a terrible place mentally.

Last autumn we found our ‘dream’ house. Unfortunately the searches revealed a less than dream problem and we had to pull out. In retrospect the house was overpriced and we’d have been working until we were 70 to stretch to pay it off. After that we offered on a money pit with a lot of potential but would have been huge stress. It was declined. I felt a bit low after that. Then mum died. We moved into rented.

Mum dying young made us reevaluate our priorities. I’d like to finish work by a reasonable age, and get a dog. So we’re moving slightly more rural which gets us more sq ft per buck and a different lifestyle, without being too far out of town- only a couple of miles out. I wouldn’t say this house has the wow factor of the first, but with work it will be done to a high quality and to our taste, plus it has some lovely character the other didn’t have and is on a pretty road.

I think once one falls through you end up a little more level headed and pragmatic about the next. There are always houses coming on for sale. Nothing is ever perfect it’s just about priorities and if lucky getting a good feeling.

Yes we started semi-seriously house hunting in the summer, as soon as Covid restrictions lifted. We hadn't put our house on the market yet when we viewed a place we both absolutely fell in love with. It needed a load of work but lots of it stuff my DH could do, and it was way under budget for us. We offered asking right away and put our house on the market but it got several offers and they went with someone who was chain free. We were gutted and made a slightly ridiculous second offer on it, but to be fair to the vendors they didn't want to go back on their acceptance of the other offer.

For ages I felt like that house was destined to come back to us somehow. We kept looking at houses but nothing came close. Eventually we found one we both like a lot - not sure we love it with our hearts in the same way, but close. We have also realised as we did more house hunting and got to know the areas better that the initial house wasn't in the best location for us, and this one is much more convenient in many ways. So hopefully it will work out for the best! Qué Sera Sera and all...

@Onandoff

Sorry about your dad, I lost my mum last month and it has left me in a terrible place mentally.

Last autumn we found our ‘dream’ house. Unfortunately the searches revealed a less than dream problem and we had to pull out. In retrospect the house was overpriced and we’d have been working until we were 70 to stretch to pay it off. After that we offered on a money pit with a lot of potential but would have been huge stress. It was declined. I felt a bit low after that. Then mum died. We moved into rented.

Mum dying young made us reevaluate our priorities. I’d like to finish work by a reasonable age, and get a dog. So we’re moving slightly more rural which gets us more sq ft per buck and a different lifestyle, without being too far out of town- only a couple of miles out. I wouldn’t say this house has the wow factor of the first, but with work it will be done to a high quality and to our taste, plus it has some lovely character the other didn’t have and is on a pretty road.

I think once one falls through you end up a little more level headed and pragmatic about the next. There are always houses coming on for sale. Nothing is ever perfect it’s just about priorities and if lucky getting a good feeling.

& I'm very sorry about your mum. I agree with the changing priorities thing. X

Yes, we found our dream house and got out bid. I was on her obsessing about it. We found a house that is just as good, it was cheaper, but we are going to spend a lot of money refurbishing it.

The house we first saw was already done - but actually the upstairs was surprisingly small - while the downstairs living space was out of proportion large.

Where we are now is much more balanced.

There will be another house. I still have the odd pang for the garden of the first one, and the fact it didn't need any work as I clean up yet more plaster dust, but the one we are in now works for us.

And our vendors waited a year for us as did our buyers. Again for reasons too tedious to go into but that little chain of 3 all waited it out.

Yes!!
Fell in love with one - even though it wasn’t perfect - and the seller decided to stay. After I’d decorated and purchased all the new furniture in my head for it

There’s one on just now which is over budget for us but not stupidly so. I can’t stop thinking about it!

Kind of did with the flat we lived in before. Kitchen and bathroom were desperately outdated, but it was spacious, big garden (for a flat), big rooms, period features and we loved the road. In fact when we moved up to a house, we stayed on this road!

I viewed it in the morning, brought DH (well, fiancé at the time) along in the evening, and he just whispered to me 'I want it!'

Never fell in love with houses we looked at, one fell through, bought second choice and happy with it. I think DH may have fallen a bit in love with one place we looked at because it backed onto a green space he loved but I meanly ruled it out as it was too far from everything and wasn't really big enough!

The previous house I bought, both DH and I fell in love with it as soon as we rang the doorbell for the viewing. We spent about five years being in love with it, but then we had DC, our incomes increased and over time it's compromises / downsides became more and more annoying. I'm not in love with our new house, but I'm very pleased we bought it. It is a better house for us as a family and we will improve it over time.

@MaryIsA I still pine after a garden - we lost a bidding war on a house that was extended to an extra two bedrooms we really didn’t need nor want but the garden was amazing. To be honest it was too much money - we could afford it in a “the bank will lend” but not in real way. Every £ spent would have to have been watched for a lot of house space We don’t need & won’t need for like 10 years. But the garden. There was a small orchard. In London.

Ended up buying one down the road - better position - worse condition inside but borderline - only the 3 bedrooms that we wanted. I am happy here but I still walk passed the other one and remember the garden. Will get over it ;)

@purpletrees16 oh yes, I could have had a small orchard in the garden of that house, and a veg patch, at least 2 sheds and probably a working greenhouse and a for show greenhouse. As well as space for grandchildren to play and the dog. It wasn't quite Monty Don size garden but getting there.

In reality I haven't really got time to look after the garden we've just got..and I will be able to squeeze a greenhouse and veg patch in, if I can persuade my husband that we don't need a garage.

But an orchard in London! wow.

I feel in love with my first house and absolutely loved living there for the first 12 years. But the neighbourhood and neighbours changed and it went downhill.

I bought the next one out of desperation really and I didn't love it. I moved within 15 months.

I'm now renting until I find something I do love. I think you know when you know. But moving from my first house proved to me it's only bricks and mortar and I got over it ok. I doubt I will ever be as attached again

I think I just have. We're going to go and see it next Saturday but I'm already panicking that it will have gone by then. I adore it...at least from the photos!

God, house hunting is stressful.