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Original poster

New neighbour etiquette

55 replies

biser · 19/02/2021 14:54

We are supposed to have new NDN moving in soon.

Are we supposed to introduce ourselves and welcome them to the neighbourhood? Or are they supposed to knock our door and introduce themselves?

Which way is the 'proper' one? I don't want to appear overfriendly nor standoffish.
Help!

OP posts:
Justa47 · 19/02/2021 15:11

Say hi when they are moving in . They will be outside a lot with boxes

MrsTWH · 19/02/2021 15:27

We moved last Friday. Both neighbours had popped cards through our door, which was really sweet. After a few days I knocked to say thanks and introduce myself. That seemed to work well.

Or just come out and say hello when they’re unloading. I’d say it was more down to you to welcome them tbh.

Chimeraforce · 19/02/2021 15:29

Nothing. Get on with your day and let them settle in. See how they are from a distance before committing yourself.

BlueTimes · 19/02/2021 15:31

I am sure you will see them moving in but if not, the first time you do just have a quick friendly chat.

Original poster
biser · 19/02/2021 15:50

The other night, when I went to lock the front door to go to bed, I realised that the door had never been unlocked in the first place! We hadn't set foot outside all day.
I could easily miss all the excitement of removal vans and boxes on the day itself.Blush

OP posts:
Original poster
biser · 19/02/2021 19:05

A hopeful bump for the evening crowd.

OP posts:
Hallyup5 · 19/02/2021 21:00

Just smile and say hi when you see them outside. No need for anyone to go knocking on anyone's door.

Weirdlynormal · 19/02/2021 21:10

Our neighbours knocked and said hello. It was nice

WalkingOnStarshine · 19/02/2021 21:11

We had our new neighbours knock on our door to say hello when we moved in and I found it really strange and awkward. I certainly couldn't imagine knocking on their door to say hello either.

However a few days later I was out in the front garden and I had a lovely, casual chat when the neighbour left her house and saw me. It felt less forced than knocking on doors.

Wingedharpy · 19/02/2021 21:30

I'd go with a cheery "Hello. I'm biser, your neighbour from number X. Settling in OK?", when you see them for 1st time.
Timing is everything. If you catch them as they're moving in, they may be fraught and teetering on the edge of a breakdown, which may skew your view of them.
I agree with you completely.
It's good to get on with neighbours but you don't want them popping round for coffee on a daily basis (or, at all, if you're me😉).

combatbarbie · 19/02/2021 21:42

Haha I'm sure Noone will miss the commotion of removals and lots of comings and going especially in a lockdown! Even more do if you have kids, they'll be the first to notice a big lorry.

LockdownCheeseToastie · 19/02/2021 21:46

If you happen to see them say hi, if not card through the door with your names and welcome to the road. We got cards from all the near neighbours when we moved and have sent them to new neighbours.

SushiGo · 19/02/2021 21:49

We just moved today! Our neighbours knocked to introduce themselves and give us some wine and chocolate which was lovely and much appreciated.

GorvidAl · 19/02/2021 21:52

Gosh, you don’t need to fret that much about it.

Leave them alone. Moving house is stressful enough without well-meaning (nosy) neighbours wanting to check you out, snoop at your furniture and try to get the gossip drop on what you’re like for the local WhatsApp.

Help them out if they ask for it, put their bins in now and again, say hello and be pleasant but not intrusive.

Redsquirrel5 · 19/02/2021 21:55

Take them a card, bit of cake or a packet of delicious biscuits. I did this with our new across the road neighbours I took them a Victoria Sponge. Moving day is manic so something sweet and a quick hello possibly tell them when bin day is and then leave.

Otherwise leave it a couple of days then catch them outside ours have four dogs.

PracticingPerson · 19/02/2021 21:57

@Chimeraforce

Nothing. Get on with your day and let them settle in. See how they are from a distance before committing yourself.
Yes this imo, people do sometimes pounce. Best thing is to be genuinely friendly when you see them naturally.
BunnyRuddington · 19/02/2021 22:00

I usually bake them something in the first week and pop around to say hello. Possibly too friendly fir some but I've always had very good neighbours Smile

Billandben444 · 19/02/2021 22:01

Be very careful, neighbours are like family - you don't get to choose them. They might be into heavy metal or own a drum kit or park in your space. Wait until you know they're not psychopaths and then nod politely on your way out one day, you can always turn on the charm at a later date.

icelollycraving · 19/02/2021 22:03

I pop a card through and after signing it, add my mobile no to it.
Then then usually text to say thanks.

Original poster
biser · 19/02/2021 22:18

Best thing is to be genuinely friendly when you see them naturally.
This is the problem, we don't 'naturally' see the neighbours. Our houses are set back about 50 feet from the road and there is a hedge between the properties. I can go for months without seeing them.

I've bought a card today. Sod's law says the sale will probably fall through now!

OP posts:
GorvidAl · 19/02/2021 22:22

Argh. Do people really think cards with your phone number, ‘delicious’ biscuits (why describe them like this? Would you take disgusting biscuits?) are welcome?

Seriously, just leave them the fuck alone. Be generally friendly and approachable, but don’t intrude. Not even with biscuits.

Sootess · 19/02/2021 22:28

We had new neighbours couple months ago. We left it a few days after they moved in so we didn’t seem like were pouncing on them! Then we took round a card and rang the bell, introduced ourselves and had quick chat.

Normandy144 · 19/02/2021 22:34

A card is a lovely gesture and I think it would be lovely to introduce yourself. At the end of the day if they're uncomfortable with you doing that you'll soon find out. Most people though will appreciate the thought. We were welcomed really nicely by our new neighbours both next door and over the road and I'm really happy we have such a lovely community.

Eleoura · 19/02/2021 22:36

I asked this exact question last year when we moved. 1 neighbour 'happened to be gardening' when we initially viewed the property and was often seen whenever we viewed it again! She was friendly and welcoming though and it was reassuring.

We met 1 neighbour through the fence and the other was walking past with their dog and we intorduced ourselves each time. We were travelling back and forth on weekends to the property due to work commitments, so we didnt have 1 moving day. We went to the direct neighbours and gave them our contact details incase they needed to get in touch whilst we werent there. If we hadnt met them in the front garden, we'd planned to introduce ourselves anyways, but I think most people feel its the exisiting residents should really welcome newcomers. (obvioulsy not mandatory though).

Another neighbour further up the street that we'd spoken to on a walk, brought around a bottle of wine and a welcome to new home card which was very touching. It also included their names and house number, which we were very grateful for. When you meet so many new people, its difficult to remember all their names!

I'd let them settle in initially, but take around a card/small gift in a week or so.

Original poster
biser · 19/02/2021 22:45

but I think most people feel its the existing residents should really welcome newcomers
Hallelujah, somebody has answered the question!
Thank you.

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