Which property?! Head vs. Heart

[headvsheart]

DP and I have one DS and I'm currently pg. We have totally outgrown our one bed flat which we're putting on the market next week.

The problem is there are two properties that we really like. One makes sense for us as a family (3 bed house with enclosed garden), is cheaper but the location isn't as good. The other is a fantastic 2 bed flat with loads of light in a great area (especially for schools and a 20 min walk to DPs work) but it is £20k more expensive (had to go in way above AP) and has v high maintenance fees.

I know it makes so much sense to go for the house but my heart says the flat, despite all the drawbacks.

I'll link them both below and any opinions would be gratefully received.

The house: www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-80801591.html

The flat: www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-60866394.html

You've kind of described exactly how I feel @Closetlibrarian.

I know outside of London buying the flat seems like a ridiculous thing to do but it doesn't to me. Though of course I'm not blind to the downsides.

As someone with multiple dc I cannot tell you how lovely it is to have paddling pool in summer while you sit and watch and then you all have ice lollies. Not having to pack a bag and go somewhere to do this but to do it on the spur of the moment.

Or the satisfaction from drying your washing on the line or watching your children hang out bird feeders or the bird house they have decorated or discover minibeasts and make them bug hotels...

A garden is a huge plus for me and with the age of your children it could be wonderful for yours.

You don't need lots of good schools, just a couple.

The inside space in the house is great and would really be appreciated as your DC grow.

But you are the only two who can make this decision...
Good luck!

Ah fair enough. In which case I'd go for the house. Kelvin Grove is a decent school and it's no bad thing being close to Forest Hill as well as CP. I just don't think the flat location is all that. We looked at a house on Colby Rd and it was pretty grimey, though the Dulwich Wood Ave side is quieter. Not a patch on having your own house though and still having best of both worlds, being in London but in a more open, greener area.

The house is fugly from the outside. The mid-century-ness of the flat is gorgeous. The light. And the sofa! But yes, the fact that someone could wander and stand right outside your window would put me off.

If you are basing you decision on schools OP have you actually visited the primaries closest to these properties? It's worth knowing that a "Good" school is reinspected roughly every 4 years whereas a school with an Outstanding Ofsted grading is exempt from future inspection. A lot can change and sometimes the "good" school might be a better fit for your child than the "outstanding" one.

To be fair, Hasta, the flat is no stunner from the outside either, and the inside is all decor and styling, achievable elsewhere. There's not much between the schools in the two locations. It's all the same sorts of kids so the cohort is comparable and the teaching good. Paxton has a smart new building that uses its site cleverly but there's no getting away from it being big for the space it has. It was single form entry not long ago. Agree it's worth visiting both rather than going off reports that won't give the true feel.

OP the flat now says Under Offer?

It's a lovely flat, but I agree with all pps who've pointed out the joy of having your own back garden when the kids are small. Ds was brought up in a flat with a lovely communal garden, but we ended up having to go to the park or to my parents' every time he wanted to kick a football around - which was often!

The house isn't pretty from the outside but it's definitely the smart family choice sorry

I know the area well and would definitely choose the house. They are close to each other so not much different in location except for local Council. Are the primary schools in Southwark so much better than Lewisham?
The house is near Wells Park which is nice and still near Crystal Palace for bars and restaurants. If you don't have a car, walking up Farquahar Road to the shops is hard work.

The flat is under offer.

I've not rtft so don't know if you've gone for it.

The op said she put an offer in and it wasn't accepted as she hasn't yet got hers on the market or sold.

I looked at a flat in that block when I first moved to London 15 years ago and it was lovely but out of my budget. But I was single. I would never buy it as a family home. Your kids will never be able to play unsupervised outside as the site is not secure at all.

I'd hang on a bit longer. If your current place is not on the market yet then it could take long enough to get an offer.

Ta Bluntness

Ah yes I see it's under offer now- maybe it's a sign from the housing gods!!

I feel positive we will find the place that's 'right' for us and everyones comments have been so useful to really work out what is important to us and whether practicality trumps location etc. So thank you to everyone who posted!

Good luck! I really hope you gets your flat under offer soon and find the place that satisfies both head and heart!

I would avoid anywhere where the only outside space is communal. You will have to supervise your DC out there for a good few years. Also, you may well find that you will get neighbours sitting chatting right outside your DC’s bedroom window in the early evening while you’re trying to put them to bed. Or even your bedroom window for that matter. Neither would I pay £450k for a leasehold flat.

I second what namechanged said...

having a garden with kids for me is wonderful. For so many reasons.

You are right to avoid Thornton Heath. You can't compare it to Sydenham or Gipsy Hill!

See that the flat is now under offer but something so think about with this one or potential new ones is that I notice the flat only has single glazing, which is what we have and it is not good at sound proofing you can hear everything very clearly eg traffic and people talking in the garden which in that flat set up wouldn't be great, we also find it's very cold in the winter too so have our heating on constantly.

My friend is living in a flat currently with her children and the neighbours are constantly complaining to her about her children making noise when they aren't doing anything noisy just walking around and playing quietly. So she feels she has to constantly be out the flat and really wishes that she could move to a house as doesn't feel she can relax in her flat with her children which is not what you want in your own home.

We have recently had this dilemma. Either a 4 bed semi with big garden, no garage in our desired location or a 6 bed detached, double garage and opposite a green space, 10 minutes drive from desired location. We have gone for house over location. The children all said they would rather their own bedroom than live in desired area. We have four boys so space is important to us. We spend a fair amount of time at home so living space is important to us.

For the reasons above I would go for the house. I hated not having a garden for my older two boys many years ago. It was nice being on one level in our flat, close to town and train station but it didn't outweigh the fact that the children had to share a room and lack of garden.

Personally I wouldn’t touch anything that’s advertised by Purple Bricks. I’ve just heard such bad reviews about them. They take the vendors money upfront and then don’t move a muscle to help sell.