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Neighbours Extension - AIBU

64 replies

Fridaynightfizz · 18/05/2018 18:26

Bit of background. We live in a very nice village in a quiet cul-de-sac, all detached houses, most of the neighbours are retired but still active. It's not our first choice of house but as we send DC to public school, we cannot afford to live in the kind of house we would dearly love to.

To get to the point, our neighbours are building an very large extension which we didn't want them to build due to the distruption these kind of things cause to people's lives. Parking is an issue and we tried to, unsuccessfully, block their planning! It's been an absolute nightmare! They are doing a self-build and it is moving very slowly. We have complained to the Council about this but they are not interested as they have planning. They have a teenage son who has "gatherings" when the parents are away, couple of weekends and an annual holiday per year. His friends and him sit in the garden drinking alcohol, being loud and using language we do not approve of. We have tried to complain to the Council about this too but it has been met on deaf ears!

There was a big bust-up and none of us are on speaking terms any longer.

The extension seems to be taking forever to do and we are just fed-up with all the dust and having to look at all their building materials stacked up - it's very unsightly!

Can anyone give any advice on what we can do to stop them building?

OP posts:
G1ggleloop · 18/05/2018 18:28

Umm nothing. If it's all been approved then you'll just have to let them get in with it. The other issues have got nothing to do with the extension

Whatdoiladymcbeth · 18/05/2018 18:28

Tough shit. Get over yourself.

I hope you do not approve of my langague.

bellsandwhistles89 · 18/05/2018 18:29

Please say this is a reverse...

AllyMcBeagle · 18/05/2018 18:29

Can anyone give any advice on what we can do to stop them building?

Nothing.

They have planning permission. You weren't able to block it. Clearly YABU.

ClaudiaWankleman · 18/05/2018 18:30

Honestly OP, from your post you sound like the nightmare neighbours.

JennyOnAPlate · 18/05/2018 18:32

You can't do anything if they have the appropriate planning permission.

From what you've posted so far I don't think it's them that's the nightmare neighbours...

sunshinesupermum · 18/05/2018 18:32

You lost me at 'very naice village.' and 'send the DC to public school.' Do you mean state school or private school (they are sometimes called public schools!)

You don't sound like the sort of neighbour I'd like to have. You didn't want them to build an extension because of all the upheaval?

No, you can't stop them building.

sunshinesupermum · 18/05/2018 18:33

bellsandwhistles89 I wondered that too.

MoreCheerfulMonica · 18/05/2018 18:33

Hmm. The most you can do is complain to the council if they don’t abide by whatever hours your council has designated for noisy building work. Even then, the council might not do much.

FaFoutis · 18/05/2018 18:34

I would move.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 18/05/2018 18:37

If this is not a reverse then I agree that you sounds like a nightmare neighbour. They have permission and occasionally their son has friends over and they enjoy being in the garden. These things happen all over the country, if you don't approve you should probably move to the deepest countryside you can find with no neighbours.

TroubledLichen · 18/05/2018 18:39

Is this a wind up?! 😂

But hey, at least your son is away at boarding school so can’t be influenced by the horrid language and doesn’t have to look at the building materials.

wowfudge · 18/05/2018 18:41

Hang on - how many on this thread would want the disruption and mess living next to a building site brings and for an indeterminate period of time? Add to that the antisocial behaviour from time to time?

Build bridges OP - it's the only way things are going to improve. You'll have to figure out how best to do that. And you need to accept you can't control next door's building works.

BarbaraOcumbungles · 18/05/2018 18:43

Tough shit. Get over yourself

^^this.

BIWI · 18/05/2018 18:44

First time poster
Posts after 5.30pm at the weekend
Mentions nice house
Private school
Parking problems
Doesn't like bad language
Disses teens

Mumsnet bingo!

MoreCheerfulMonica · 18/05/2018 18:46

I am currently living in the epicentre of massive building works, with three neighbours - all of whom seem to have engaged the builders from Hell - currently extending their houses. So I know that living with other people’s never-ending building work can be grim, but there’s almost nothing one can do about it.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 18/05/2018 18:47

Mumsnet bingo

Nah she missed out the parking part, do the neighbours block your drive or park in parent and toddler spaces with their teen?

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 18/05/2018 18:49

Ah never mind she said parking was an issue, I missed that line O_o may I be the first to suggest penguin bollards. Grin

StealthNinjaMum · 18/05/2018 18:49

Could I have a diagram please?

bellsandwhistles89 · 18/05/2018 18:55

In all honesty if my neighbours decided to extend and it went on for a while I would be irritated but not to the point of having a 'bust up'. I would talk to them and then if nothing changed I would probably just accept it and understand that sometimes life can be a bit of a pain in the arse and I can't control what they do. It's their house. Regarding the anti social behaviour if the council cant be bothered with the complaints then to be honest theres probably not a lot of anti social behaviour going on... a couple of evening's in a year. Meh. Means you can have a couple of parties yourself.

RB68 · 18/05/2018 18:58

AND there is no cheque

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 18/05/2018 19:00

AND there is no cheque

Maybe she cancelled it already so didn't feel the need to add it to the post? Wink

Fridaynightfizz · 18/05/2018 19:04

Totally get that people do building work but surely you should consult with your neighbours about when you want to do any work and at all major stages - surely it just amounts of anti-social behaviour? We moved here to enjoy the peace and quiet not have to listen to loud music in the garden, teenagers getting drunk and building work going on..even on a Saturday morning!!!

We are both professionals who work hard all week and cannot even sit in our garden enjoying the sunshine without them making some kind of noise! I don't think IABU?

OP posts:
scrumples · 18/05/2018 19:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PatriciaHolm · 18/05/2018 19:07

I can see the pearls being clutched from here.

I'm on the side of it being a completely fictional a reverse though.

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