Stay in N London or do the big move?

[freddiefrogpercypig]

Live in Muswell Hill. Work in city. Have 2 preschool kids. Love it here. However thinking of moving out to tun wells as 1) secondary schools (though mh also good) 2) fab countryside nearby 3) lots for kids and adults to do 4) commute not bad to city 5) get larger home
However love it here as great range of parks and the woods, fab primaries, easy commute, friendly, safe, villagey.
Are we mad? We have a small 4 bed here on outskirts. We could get a large 4 bed with garden there. Friends going from mh now but hope id meet more through school. Know one good friend in TW.
Are we mad? Is the lure of countryside and space not all its cracked up to be? Will I miss muswell hill? Is the commute from TW too much. It's tricky as not quite sure what I'm soon with my work but working on assumption I'll need to get into London part time too.

[farleywatts]

Maybe Doctor, where do you live? It sounds perfect!

[WhatwouldOliviaPopedo]

We live down the road from you on the Harringay Ladder waves up the hill and if I had a four-bed in MH I wouldn't move! As you say, it's just about the best place to live with small kids in N London. We just went through the same dilemma/wobble but have decided to stay put for all the reasons Itscoldoutthere mentions - awful commute, teenage kids in need of constant taxi service, novelty of countryside wearing off, etc. I'm now so happy to be staying.

[farleywatts]

Hi, I've not posted on mumsnet before so not sure if this post is still live and people can see it? Basically I am having exactly the same debate about staying in Muswell Hill, or moving out to the countryside. I grew up in a small village which and would like the same for my two young children, although I don't know what it is like as a parent living there. My husband grew up in North London and would still need to commute into work each day.

We have a 5 bed terrace house here with a decent garden for London and we just got a place at the great primary next to us. The secondaries have a very good reputation here too.

My big fear is children, especially teenagers, being able to leave the house and go anywhere in the city. In the countryside when you need to be driven to places parents can at least have more control/protection over what children are doing.

Other reasons are that we can hear our neighbours all the time so there isn't often a sense of calm/peace.
We want our family to grow and we could get a lot more space and offstreet parking for the same value as our current house in the Commuterbelt.
I find getting in and out of London to see family very tricky, we always get stuck. Coming from a smaller place I find driving around London stressful also and I avoid it which means I mainly do things I can walk to.
If my children only experience living in London, they may not feel that it is easy to live elsewhere and property is so expensive that they may not be able to get a home of their own.
The traffic, crime and pollution.

I am very aware that my eldest will soon settle into school and that it will be harder to move them the older they get. I don't want them to get any older and feel deep regret that we didn't move when we could have done.

Can anyone please offer any advice?
Thank you very much for reading.

[Changebagsandgladrags]

I've done it. Moved from West London to rural North Yorkshire. I love it. The kids go to a small village school, they play out with friends in the village, the countryside is all around. There's something about being able to look out on all this green, that's relaxing or something, I can't quite put my finger on it. We're less stressed, everyone is here.

I'm a lot more isolated than I was. However, I've found it easy to make friends. Mostly through school.

On the downside, DS (11) really wants to live in a city, although youngest prefers the countryside.

[mayhew]

No don't leave. A previous poster seemed to dread her children being independently mobile in London when they got older. For our family that was a massive plus!
Our friends who relocated spent 15 years driving their children around. Rather them than me!

[WhatwouldOliviaPopedo]

farleywatts Part of the reason we've decided to stay is because our DD is naturally anxious and we think growing up in London will help her become more independent. Ferrying her about all over the countryside well into her teens makes me fear we'll never cut the apron strings! But that's us and you need to do what's right for your family. If anything, it sounds a bit to me like you've mentally already left London, for all the reasons you've listed. Can you find somewhere that your husband can easily commute from?