Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Property/DIY

Join our Property forum for renovation, DIY, and house selling advice.

Help we've moved but seller has not disclosed neighbour dispute

110 replies

wondermum1 · 03/06/2014 20:53

Hi, Feeling sick as I write this, been up for nights and think am going to go towards a breakdown. Finally bought a great house in a good area and refurbished it (£50k worth of refurb), house does genuinely look beautiful. Next door house is in a complete state and since we've been here (6 months) no one has cut or tended to garden, grass now waist high and apparently (according to neighbour otherside) now rats. Despite notes through neighbours door even offering to pay for a gardener getting negative response. Turns out she has been a nuisance neighbour for over 20 years and everyone "hates" her. When we saw the house, previous owner was apparently dealing with garden to make it look more attractive as state of house was preventing sale. When we saw it, the neighbouring house looked "ok" not great but passable and we were told was owned by an old lady who had 2 carers (not true, no old lady just two women). Am at wits end, do I sue previous owner? If I do and I sell my house do I need to disclose as well? How do I deal with the neighbour? I'm so desperate want to put house straight on market but husband says we can't do that. ;((((((( HELP!

OP posts:
SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 04/06/2014 11:30

Are the ladies able bodied? Are they elderly? (I am a little confused as you were told the neighbours were one elderly lady & two carers, but there now appear to be just two ladies).

I used to work in community care, and actually had to make visits to a few homes which I had driven past previously and thought either "no-one lives there" or "why don't they sort their garden out?". Each of these houses was being occupied by a disabled (and usually elderly) person. In two instances the occupier was entirely bed bound & saw no-one apart from carers four times a day. When a person can't even stand up, they certainly can't mow their lawn.

Obviously, these are extreme examples but have your considered the possibility that your neighbours do not have the capacity to maintain the outside of the house themselves? Could there perhaps be a physical or mental health disability in the equation here? Do you ever see either lady going outside?

The rats, if they exist, would bother me & I would be getting environmental health involved to help with that. The lawn & car are, quite frankly, none of your business. No matter what the neighbour has told you, you do not KNOW why things are as they are.

I was once confronted by the neighbour of a man I was caring for, asking me why he hadn't cleared his gutters or tidied up his gardens for ages & could I have a word with him and tell him he needed to get it done. The fact that this man was unable to stand, being hoisted in and out of bed four times a day, doubly incontinent and unable to feed himself was all irrelevant to her. Some people really do struggle to see beyond their own, often irrelevant, "needs".

Isabelleforyourbicycle · 04/06/2014 11:38

OP, there is another thread ongoing, a lighthearted one about neighbours. Some examples include drug dealers, anti social parties, teenage boys wanking on their bedroom windows,,,I suggest you read that thread for a little bit of perspective. And to cheer you up.

HamAndPlaques · 04/06/2014 11:44

OP, there's a lot of sensible advice here (especially from AgnesGrey). In particular, please stop listening to your neighbours' horror stories - they seem to be the sources of much of your stress.

forago · 04/06/2014 11:50

what does it matter if their place is a dump? you haven't actually seen any rats and they haven't impacted on you or your property at all. I don't get it? The only negative at the moment is that the state of the place might put of potential purchasers when you come to sell - but as you have just moved there, done up the house, like the area and have no actual physical problems at your property presumably this won't matter for now. And you have years to manage the neighbor issue and try and get the council to make them tidy it up (or they die/leave, the landlord sells to another couple who will do it up).

I really don't think you have a great problem here, certainly not enough to warrant getting so stressed over.

EleanorHandbasket · 04/06/2014 11:53

You sound a bit like my SIL, she mows her neighbours lawn and dug up her wild flowers because she said they were weeds.

Your neighbours garden is none of your business, frankly.

OddFodd · 04/06/2014 11:57

I think your 'nice' neighbours sound like unpleasant bigots and I'm not surprised the two women next door adopt a fuck you attitude.

wowfudge · 04/06/2014 12:16

Actually I have had a better idea re: your neighbours. A good in-road to dialogue would be to go round and apologise for any inconvenience, noise, disruption caused by your renovation works. And to say you realise you probably didn't get off on the right foot. Perhaps take them some flowers. They might be thinking 'how dare wondermum suggest we sort our garden out when her builders have been making all that racket and she did even warn us about it'.

Unless there is more to this than your post suggests then there doesn't seem to be much to be so upset about.

Moving house can be bad enough without the disruption of having work done.

WalterWhiteMakesBlue · 04/06/2014 13:45

I think you are being unfairly slated OP and I completely get where you are coming from! I can't advise on the legal stuff, but it sounds like you already have some good advice on that.

the only thing I would say is that if you let things bother you, then they will. We had horrible neighbours - did minor damage to our property on many occasions, threw stuff over the fence on to our garden, had a really stinky compost bin in a very small garden, pile of junk in the front garden... we were soooo pleased when they moved......but then in moved even worse ones - swore at each other all hours, threw crockery at each other, had a very menacing dog...and we live in a very naice road!

So whilst I understand how upset this is making you, then just turn a blind eye to it and let them be. You might even find that one day they are quite nice. Deal with the practical things that you can like the vermin and worth trying to contact the owner to see if something can be done (may be he can give you permission to do the garden?), but other than that, don't let them bother you!

Swannery · 04/06/2014 13:54

Compared with neighbours we have now and have had in the past, these are a dream.
I think you need to become a bit less "naice" and entitled. You're talking as though having lots of money to spend entitles you to a life of absolute perfection. Get over it.

Pipbin · 04/06/2014 14:50

Actually I have had a better idea re: your neighbours. A good in-road to dialogue would be to go round and apologise for any inconvenience, noise, disruption caused by your renovation works

I did exactly this. The teenagers next-door were up singing and shouting late into the night when we first moved in. Later that week I went round to the neighbours to say that we would be having a tiny bit of work done and as it was a mate doing a favour it would be after about 5 and sorry for the noise. I also said 'and if we are ever noisy then do let us know.' Which opened the conversation about the kids singing and shouting. The mother apologised and it's never been a problem since.

JuliaScurr · 04/06/2014 16:12

www.wickes.co.uk/Wickes-Overlap-Fence-Panel-1-8mx1-8m-Autumn-Gold/p/540053

then you don't need to look at the mess

agnesgrey · 05/06/2014 22:50

OP . are you you OK - have you done some of the things advised here ?

Hope things moving forward for you

Worksallhours · 06/06/2014 00:45

Wonder, I have sympathy for your situation. I am in somewhat of a similar one. We moved house last year, and the former owner did not disclose that he had had the worst relationship with his neighbours possible (we live in a semi and they are in the adjoining property). Apparently, so I later discovered, it had descended to the former owner installing CCTV and filming the neighbours doing all kinds of supposedly nefarious deeds.

When we moved in, we heard all sorts of horror stories from the other neighbours on our street, and had some fairly strong warnings. One neighbour, lets call him Mr M, told us to be really careful because a shopping directory for Mr M had somehow got delivered to our neighbour's house and their son had bought a load of stuff on Mr M's account while Mr M was recovering in hospital from a near fatal motorbike accident -- only for, when the son's ruse was discovered, the son to claim that Mr M had actually bought the items in question. From his intensive care bed. With two broken arms and two broken legs. And a smashed jaw.

Now, yes, their garden is a mess, complete with two old soggy sofas. And they have a habit of setting fire to things in the garden, like paperwork and old chairs. But my OH and I actually get on really well with their two teenage daughters, who are absolutely lovely and come round quite a bit to chat about pets and tap-dancing.

However, this did not stop me from being utterly bewildered when these very same neighbours began to dump industrial amounts of used white cat litter in their back garden and the waste land next to our garden (which is actually part of their property though my neighbour refuses to accept this). It was the waste land dumping that really bothered me because, after a while, the smell was really quite pungent. Every time I came home, I would open the car door and ... my eyes would water.

So I solved the problem in the only way I could. I went round to the neighbours wearing my most shocked face, and said "Mr Neighbour, you are not going to believe what has happened! Someone has dumped an incredible amount of used cat litter on the wasteland behind your house. When you told me people dumped there, I never thought you meant things like cat litter. Now I know you have a bad knee, so I will clear it all out and get rid of it -- do not worry about that. It smells so bad and it will attract all sorts of vermin."

And I did. And the cat litter never appeared there again. And their daughters still come round and chat about pets and tap-dancing.

A basketful of win for everyone, I think.

agnesgrey · 06/06/2014 01:37

Worksallhours

Fabulous story Grin

Absolutely a great endorsement for getting on with neighbours

Well done you

AG

Leviticus · 06/06/2014 09:04

Worksallhours that is brilliant. Hugely admirable.

Hooliesmoolies · 06/06/2014 09:30

OP there is a house on one of the roads near us that had old cars parked on the drive for years. They were totally buried in the weeds and plants that had grown up around them. However someone must have reported them because there was a planning notice requiring them to move them.

With regards to the rats - my cats bring rats in sometimes (aren't I lucky). They aren't in our garden specifically, they are just in London. It is horrible to think that they are around, but they are. There are rats in London. I believe there is a problem with them. However it may not mean they are in your neighbours garden.

Good luck goes out to mow lawn which is knee high Blush

GrendelsMinim · 06/06/2014 10:46

I wonder whether the rats might in fact be shrews or voles, if there's long meadowland grass in the neighbours' garden. In which case they're great, because they eat slugs and snails for you.

wowfudge · 06/06/2014 14:30

I don't think the OP is coming back. No one agreed her neighbour was a nuisance.

Swannery · 06/06/2014 14:38

Do you think she learned anything?

Celeriacacaca · 06/06/2014 14:51

OP I really hope you take on board what the majority are saying on here. You can't ignore it. Apart from an overgrown garden, your distress is not based on any fact at all.

When we moved in (also in a lovely London street) we knew the house next door looked a bit of a state but it didn't put us off. The neighbours who lived there were delightful but just not interested in doing gardening or home maintenance. They sadly moved out of London and now we have the nightmare naice family who have done the top of the range renovations and landscaping but have absolutely no idea how to live considerately alongside other people in the community. While their garden and house may look pristine, I'd take the "tatty" neighbours any day for what really matters.

cafesociety · 06/06/2014 17:13

OP, as someone with a controlling, passive/aggressive, manipulative neighbour who is nosey and a busybody often peeking from behind her blinds [we can see you!] and making it difficult for me to enjoy my own back garden.....I would swop and have your neighbours any day.

However I calculate the hedge I planted should be higher next year and she won't have such a good view/be able to nab me for a moan/gossip about others.

JodieGarberJacob · 06/06/2014 17:52

I need to know what activities these old ladies get up to that are deemed anti-social by shit-stirring neighbour? I mean, are they knitting loudly late into the night? Playing Russ Conway records after 11.00pm? Revving their mobility scooters for 20 minutes before zooming off to get their pensions?

And have you never heard of kerb appeal? Where you tart up your house to look attractive to buyers? The vendor was doing exactly that.

Make friends with them is what I'd do.

wowfudge · 06/06/2014 18:28

Ooh - Russ Conway after 11pm would tip me over the edge Jodie Grin

AgathaF · 06/06/2014 18:34

I don't think the OP is coming back. Hope she doesn't try to sue MN for the bad opinions and advice on here Grin.

Swannery · 06/06/2014 18:40

She really reminds me of our neighbours. Have nothing to do with any of the locals, have loads of money, massive house, pristine garden, got aggrieved because a neighbour had a toddler's outside toys in her garden, and have grown a massive hedge on all sides to block off all sight of anybody else's garden.