Help we've moved but seller has not disclosed neighbour dispute

[wondermum1]

Hi, Feeling sick as I write this, been up for nights and think am going to go towards a breakdown. Finally bought a great house in a good area and refurbished it (£50k worth of refurb), house does genuinely look beautiful. Next door house is in a complete state and since we've been here (6 months) no one has cut or tended to garden, grass now waist high and apparently (according to neighbour otherside) now rats. Despite notes through neighbours door even offering to pay for a gardener getting negative response. Turns out she has been a nuisance neighbour for over 20 years and everyone "hates" her. When we saw the house, previous owner was apparently dealing with garden to make it look more attractive as state of house was preventing sale. When we saw it, the neighbouring house looked "ok" not great but passable and we were told was owned by an old lady who had 2 carers (not true, no old lady just two women). Am at wits end, do I sue previous owner? If I do and I sell my house do I need to disclose as well? How do I deal with the neighbour? I'm so desperate want to put house straight on market but husband says we can't do that. ;((((((( HELP!

I think your neighbour is winding you up by telling you all these things about the previous owner. Ignore him/her, cut the grass if it's upsetting you, call environmental health about the rats and plant a hedge or put up a big fence so you can't see next door.

What first hand evidence do you have of anti-social behaviour?

Surely it hasn't got in this much of a state in 6 months? So you must have brought it with the garden being somewhat of a state and seeing what the next door was like. What makes you think someone else won't??

Contact the council about the rats. Offer to cut the grass if it's bothering you that much (personally we hardly ever cut our grass either - the inside of our home is lovely and decorated and clean but neither of us give a shit about the grass and both hate gardening).

What evidence of anti social behaviour do you actually have?

So you live next to these people yet you have seen nothing to verify the gossip?
Long grass? It is up to them really how they keep their garden.

I actually feel sorry for the two ladies that reside in the property. Their neighbours spend their days bitching and gossiping about them and they are isolated from their neighbours.

Stop putting notes through their door demanding they deal with their property. Personally, I would tell you to fuck off.

I can't believe you've got this wound up over neighbours your house is detached from. Get a grip. No you can't sue - would be a waste of time and money.

If you send a solicitors letter you WILL have to declare it with consequences for saleability / price. Do you really want to go down that route? Why has it taken 6 whole months for you to get to the point of " breakdown" ? Nothing you have said indicates anything other than a neighbour's allergy to grass cutting. Over reaction.

Oh for Pete's sake!!

Long grass and an untaxed car in the drive does not nuisance neighbours make!!
Instead, you more than likely have two elderly ladies who can no longer drive and for whom it is too difficult to mow the lawn as they are erm... a bit elderly perhaps?

Pop round with a packet of biscuits, introduce yourself, offer to cut the lawn once or twice a month.
Ignore the car, it is on their driveway, nothing to do with you.

If you have not seen any evidence of rubbish or rats then ignore it, it is a non issue.

You do not have nightmare neighbours, far from it. You do however have a gossip mongering, shit stirring neighbour two doors down!!

Stop making a mountain out of a molehill!

If i were you, I'd be tackling this from a 'how can this be made more tolerable for me' angle rather than 'who can I blame'.

Try talking to your neighbours. Get to know them. Ask if you can help manage their garden. Mention the rats - they may be unaware and horrified.

You will possibly be living next door to them for many years. Make friends not animosity.

You're at your wits end over some grass and stuff your neighbours have told you?

I agree... spot the tenant in this story

We've just moved in the last year. Spent a lot on renovations. Neighbour's garden has very long grass and is on the scruffy side. I would prefer it is not but it is not up to me to dictate how perfect a garden should be kept. Their kids are also noisey. However this is just life to me - I chat to my neighbours and we are becoming quite friendly. Although I understand it is disappointing - you don't really have a right to dictate.

I find it a little double standards that your main gripe seems to be the previous owner of your property may have been hiding things from you. However from reading your posts you seem to suggest you are going to try to do the exact same thing to any potential buyer if you sell.

Other neighbours are often quick to slag off each other to new people. The words they choose are often chosen to inflame. The term anti-social behaviour being one of them - but in what way in the last 6 months have you neighbours been anti-social?

I've had anti-social neighbours in the past and believe me a neighbour with long grass is nothing. We too have made a huge effort to buy in a lovely location. I do understand you therefore want your new life and house to be wonderful in all aspects but there are some things you may just have to accept are now exactly how you would like them to be.

As others have said, you are really turning this into something far bigger than it needs to be, and the person suffering most because of that, is you.

Regarding the previous owners actions, you don't know why they didn't want you coming round to visit the property during the sale, you are only guessing it was to do with the neighbours grass. I think that is unlikely, since you could have driven past at any time and seen the grass for yourself. The house itself cannot have deteriorated too much in 6 months, therefore you have only yourself to blame if you didn't notice it's condition before, and now feel this is an issue for you.

The rest of it - well, you haven't seen anti-social behaviour, you haven't seen dumped rubbish, you haven't seen rats (rats are in most places anyway, but get EH to check out the property if you have genuine reason for concern), you don't know the car hasn't been SORNed. Why not put this stupid gossip out of your mind and accept the reality, which is that you live next door to a house that is in need of a bit of decoration outside and the grass needs cutting. You use inflammatory language that fuels your own fire of rage - the "dumped car" (parked is the reality), living next door to a dump, the alleged desperation to sell of the previous owner etc. It seems that really, the ladies keep themselves to themselves and don't disturb you. It doesn't sound like you've even spoken to them. Yet they let the previous owner cut the grass, so why wouldn't they let you do it too, since you say you are willing to? Perhaps they feel like you've been nightmare neighbours with your renovation work, rude notes, gossip.

Stop letting gossipy neighbours wind you up. Take the steps you can to improve things - hedging, EH to check for evidence of rats. Knock on their door - be friendly and polite, introduce yourselves, offer garden help etc.

So are you saying that the neighbour hasn't actually done anything to you - not shouted at you, insulted you, thrown things at you, had loud music, been banging stuff about, thrown things onto your property, smashed your window, screamed at your kids, etc etc - none of the things that people might have assumed you meant when you talked about a nightmare neighbour - the only thing about this person is their garden is a bloody mess and they have an old car on their property and someone else has told you they have seen rats but you haven't seen them and someone else has told you the neighbour puts rubbish outside but you haven't seen it in the 6 months you have been living there?

What has the neighbour actually done to you?

If it's just the state of the garden, then report it to environmental health if it's full of rats and you have seen them. They'll come out and have a look. They can force a clean up if they agree it needs it.

But if you just went to the neighbour and put notes through the door saying your garden is horrible, let us bring it up to scratch, can you not see why they might have said sod off? I mean, you just put notes through? Not even a hi I'm your new neighbour knock on the door? Just straight to notes?

And when you say that other neighbours have had problems - what have they reported to you specifically that is 'anti social late night behaviour'? Loud music? Shouting? Threats?

tbh, If I was bothered by the mess in my neighbour's garden, I'd just put a higher fence up and forget all about it. If I saw rats, I'd report them. If I saw rubbish being dumped, I'd report it. If the neighbours told me I'd say to them well, if you've seen that, then report it to environmental health.

I thought this was going to be a noisy neighbour/ASB thread for which I'd have had huge sympathy, having been there myself. But I have to say this doesn't sound like a big problem. I live in a 'posh' area myself, but the house next door has been empty for 25 years, has waist high grass and looks far from inviting. I actually don't mind - it's lovely and quiet and frees up extra parking. I do know the (absentee) owner, and have always kept things civil with him - it's his house after all. I pop across now and again to pick up litter which has blown in or clear away some of the junk mail on the step, more to avoid inviting squatters than anything else.

It's London - you get can huge variations in one road. I know its hard when you're focused on the negatives but try to enjoy what you have - a lovely detached house in a great area. Avoid litigation at all cost - it will be emotionally draining, hugely expensive and take over your life.

holy heck. my back garden is over grown woth weeds. there is boxes from when I had a clear out. my old shed blew down.

I work permanent nights. I never have the energy to deal with the back garden.

my neighbours have never approached me. I have my garden they have theirs. ignore their garden. deal with your home and stuff. rats do not need grass to live in. rats can luve in tidy clean gardens too.

I think your needing to focus on something else in life.

I know if my neighbours complained id tell them to mind their own.

Have you not thought your other neighbours are winding you up enough to make a complaint while they don't, so if you or they sell it's you who will have to declare it, therefore making it difficult to sell, not them.

Your sellers had no need to declare anything, it's long grass and an untaxed car, declare hat exactly, you have eyes you must have been able to see it for yourself.

Bloody litigation culture.

If there was never any direct conflict between the ex-owner and the ndn/landlord he wouldn't have had to declare it . An unsightly garden is not in itself a crime and him mowing it from time to time doesn't substantiate an issue. You've been there 6 months already and presumably carried out fairly extensive and possibly intrusive work to your property but they haven't complained . By all means write to the ll expressing concern about the maintenance of the property and EH re. rats but think you'd have a hard time proving ex-owner lied on basis of 3rd hand gossip.

What is it exactly that is making you desperate? The rats?

Actually - I am going to say you sound like a bit of a Hyacinth Bucket, OP. You also sound very vengeful: telling HMRC about the LL of the next door property, getting a solicitor on to the vendor, etc. Seriously, this is not a good use of your energies and is so negative. It seems you are more bothered by appearances than what really matters.

I would go round to the neighbours you don't know with some biscuits or a cake and say you realise you have not got off on the best foot and offer to help them out as neighbours.

You cannot form a valid opinion about someone based on the gossip of others. In fact our wilderness garden neighbours are bitched about by two sets of other neighbours, both of whom I get on with fine. I don't participate in the bitching and closed down a recent conversation going down that route with a swift change of subject.

I don't like their garden much, but when I'm in ours, I can't see it so it's not a big deal. My neighbours are a bit alternative, which I think is part of the issue the others have with them - they don't conform. They do however do a lot for the community. Worth more than any sniping gossip imo. I turn a blind eye to the old window frame on the garage roof, the broken fence panel left where it fell even after it was replaced with a new one, the copious weeds, etc because it's not my problem: I have enough to do with my own sh*t to worry about and my own garden, etc.

What wa the neighbours house like when you went to view yours? You must have had an idea of what it was going to be like?

The fact that the neighbours had an untidy garden doesn't mean that the people who sold to you were in dispute with them. Even if they did some gardening for them because they preferred to have a tidier garden next door. That's called helping out a neighbour, not being in dispute with a neighbour. My next door neighbour used to trim my hedges for me, because he was a nice man and was better at that kind of thing than I was. We weren't in any kind of dispute, quite the opposite.
You sound ridiculous, to be honest. Try to learn some tolerance and use your energy on things that matter more than whether someone else's garden is neat and tidy or not.

As a neighbour who has had notes stuck through my door and on to my car when a simple knock on the door would have done the trick- you've probably given your neighbours sleepless nights and caused them great anxiety. Stop being so fucking passive aggressive and go round if you have that much of an issue.

The only fact that you have is that their grass is long. You have no idea if their car is sorn or not. Unless it's been there for 20 years and has a tree growing out of it it's not an eyesore either. Presumably it looks like a car on a drive Shocking.

You have no idea if there are rats. Considering you're nosy enough to take notice of a small tax disc I'm sure you would have seen one by now. Your other neighbour claims that they dump rubbish. If they haven't done it in six months they're probably not going to. You have no idea.

So basically you're "heading for a breakdown" over grass and speculation. Meanwhile you've been posting passive aggressive notes through your neighbours door. Well done, very clever. They're probably ignoring you because you're too childish and pathetic to go round and speak like a grown-up. I spent too long caring about the notes my neighbours left us, having sleepless nights, not wanting to leave my house in case they were there, feeling isolated and anxious (that has to do with more than the notes though), when all of that could habr been avoided by them treating me like a human and tapping on the door. You can argue that you want to keep the peace and don't want a dispute with your new neighbours, but your acrions thus far have procen otherwise.

Funny, because my cunt neighbour's lawn is beyond immaculate. Doesn't change the fact rhat they're cunts.

What is the difference between not getting on with your neighbours and a neighbour dispute? Where do you draw the line? I would have thought that a neighbour dispute is something that physically affects your property (such as something causing damage or a boundary dispute) but I am not a lawyer so I don't know.

all you have said is that the grass is long and there is an old car on their drive? bizarre.

OP, Have a watch of Alan Bennett's 'Lady of Letters' and think about why you're so keen on judging your neighbours.

I agree, you need to talk to them. We have been on bad terms with our neighbours for 8 years now because they initially communicated with p/aggr notes through the door about tiny things rather than just ringing on the bell and introducing themselves like grown ups. I do see it must be a bit of a downer to be living next door to a dump but if it wasn't that bad when you moved in you can surely maintain it to the same acceptable standard.