SE London or country/coast for kids and teenagers?

[philbee]

We live in SE London and until recently I really liked it. Am now a bit fed up with the spitting, dog shit etc. and thinking about whether it's also a bit stabby and dodgy for the DDs once they're older (and possibly now too, tbh).

We went on a holiday to lovely Suffolk coast this summer and it seemed so nice to be outside, at the beach etc., and that that's what childhood should be about, and I enjoyed it a lot too. But are teenagers better off not in a rural place? I don't know and don't know about jobs out of London, we are both website / information people so possibly not much around for us outside London. What do others think about the best place for children to grow up?

starfish, yes, that's what I was thinking. Or Exeter, Southampton etc.

Very interesting thread. I am in South London and contemplating a move to Hertfordshire (Broxbourne area). My South London bit is far from trendy (South Norwood) but prices have been going up a lot recently.
I am terrified of leaving my social network here, but more terrified that DS1, who is now 5 and is likely to have ADHD/ODD, will get himself into trouble when he is teenager. If I had girls or both DS were like my DS2, I would probably risk and stay in London where I am.

My budget is very limited (230k max). I am soon to be single mum, working FT and longer commute. I am terrified of making the move away from my friends but strongly believe it is for the future of my kids. I hope they will not be unhappy once they reach their teenager years.

I moved from London to the Suffolk coast. Its great, would never go back, The kids are just as occupied as they would be if we were in London, it depends completely on the kids, if they are likely to hang around the streets in London that's most likely what they'll do here.

The schools are fantastic, the community is great, lifestyle healthier & happier etc.
I can pick my youngest up from school & got o the beach for an hour.
All sorts of sports clubs & loads of music & artsy type stuff around for kids
there are loads of seasonal holiday jobs to keep the teens occupied :)
As for IT & web type work, there are a number of mid to large employers about it just means half hour drive rather that half hour on the tube.
There are quite a few IT communications type roles at Martlesham, Adastral Park
If you don't buy on the seafront in Aldeburgh or Southwold you can still get a good size house for your money

Oh & I get my veg from the farm & meat from the butchers, its lovely!

imo Exeter is very boring on full-time basis for anyone teenagers. Brighton/Southampton completely different. Canterbury nice and inbetween somewhere between boring and funly like Brighton.

funky, that is.

mymatemax, I've heard lots of good feedback about Suffolk, but on the other hand, aren't the trains to London very slow, or never direct? Or is that really Norfolk? I think if someone has friends/things to do in London regularly, it's just a bit too far. But OP may not need london much, of course. Btw, is Ipswich nice?

Ipswich to London Liverpool Street is about 50 mins & usually pretty good except on a Sunday when its crap, there are lots of little lines from the smaller towns & villages that feed in to it.
Have a look at Woodbridge, lovely small town on the river but big enough to have everything you need, maybe a good 1st move out of London & not so far as Aldeburgh, Walberswick, Southwold.

The schools are fab & not oversubscribed, we had a choice of 3 fantastic primaries.
The secondary schools are a little more spread out but again, still a choice of good schools & as everyone travels to school everyone is in the same boat & the kids all seem very good at making arrangements to all meet up etc rather than just hanging around IYKWIM.
Also the schools draw a big social mix as they cover a large geographical area my ds's friends parents range from Professional opera singers to fruit pickers & everywhere in between.

Ipswich is like all large towns, parts are lovely other parts not so nice, I don't really like the town centre for shopping, tend to go to Norwich more.
Some areas on the outskirts of Ipswich are really nice & you can get a lot for your money

Starfish where in Cornwall are you? Your descriptions make it sound amazing!

Ewww at Suffolk. It's very pretty but it is a really shitty place to grow. So many really thick people.

Library ! er, intelligence is generally not a geographical thing , not in the UK/developed countries at any rate!

you may mean provincial or closed-minded, but that's the case in many other small towns all over the country.

Beagles I'm surprised you say that about Exeter - is that recent experience? The teenagers I know are busy, busy, the new climbing centre is amazing, with courses running all the time, there's a new outdoor activity centre on the quay, the shopping is massively improving with Princesshay and John Lewis. (Ikea is coming - yay!) Public transport is great, frequent and easy for teens, including trains to the coast. All the schools and scouts etc take part in Ten Tors. There's bowling, 3 cinemas, the Phoenix does loads of workshops in printing, animation, drama, dance, there's an olympic gym club, multiple swimming pools both indoor and outdoor. There's Beautiful Days nearby, along with Chagstock and Sidmouth Folk Festival a short drive away. You can level a lot at Exeter, but dull isn't fair ime.

p.s. I don't live in suffolk, and have never been, so it wasn't self-defence .

Sorry, Pommes, it isn't a very recent experience, and I've only visited rather than stayed there. This was year and a half ago - dodn't see the improved shopping, and wasn't looking at climbing centres . It may well be improving.

I was really commenting on the vibe of hte place - when I visited it was so quiet and had no liveliness to it, even though it's nice-looking (Cathedral, and the river park are nice). A bit soul-less in the centre even though quite clean and safe.

I suppose I was comparing to Bristol where I travelled from, and there is SO much vibrancy there and lots of arts/science type museums for kids, vibrant life along the canals, LOTS of shopping. And I lived in London for years and years. Also Brighton is extremely vibrant - but actually too much for me!

I admit, I haven't been comparing like with like in terns of the size of cities. I'm sure if you live and know it as an insider, the impression is completely different. Personally I need more vibrancy and I'm not so sporty, but for sporty teengers it's all there as you describe!

Exeter has the current Museum of the year.

Library, I assume you are from Norfolk!

Philbee, your DH made me smile. He expressed succinctly the dread that these places induce in me.

I would approach it by trying to find my "tribe", i.e. people that are closest to you in terms of aspirations, preferred way to spend weekends, going out etc. Obviously you have schools etc to think of but it's your life and you won't get another chance but your children will. I know of a costly mistake our friends made when they moved out of London. They are both arty and felt stifled by life in a little town they chose based solely on rational judgement. They had to sell after 18 months, and have now found a place which suited them much better: arty, vibrant, vegetarian (). Couldn't be happier now.

That's ok Beagles, it is what it is - a small city - so it is never going to have the range of facilities of a much bigger place such as Bristol (though it doesn't have its downsides either). Museums-wise, as Russians says, Exeter's RAMM is/was Museum of the Year 2012, and there are other galleries etc too, plus the library is undergoing a huge revamp. However, for a small city, it has a lot more than it "should" do in terms of size because of the large area that it serves.

OP I agree with pp advice, do not even consider moving unless you have experienced your chosen spot in all weathers/seasons. There is little more depressing than an out of season, rainy, seaside town!

Pommes, as I say, it may have amenities on the up, but to me, the vibe just wasn't there, which can be present in SE seaside towns (Brighton is small after all) - not that Exeter is actually seaside (neither is Bristol, though some great ships in the harbour). Museums in Bristol are award winning too, and it's not just one that's good . Btw Exeter has rundown parts too, it's not all pretty, in Bristol you can easily avoid the bad parts as it's so spread out.

I was really thinking in terms of OP, and how she sounds as a personality. Just somehow don't think Exeter is her sort of place - but just my opinion!

You visited once. For one day. There is nothing in Exeter remotely approaching the sort of deprivation there is in Bristol.

Bristol is much much bigger than Exeter - but still tiny compared to London. So, size is irrelevant. Bristol is rather further away from the seaside than Exeter too - 6 miles compared to > 20 miles (and that's to Weston. Which isn't technically a beach).

Both places are boring and provincial and lack culture but Exeter is much nicer than Bristol. Wy do you think Bristol is always pretending to be in the South West when it's neither south nor west? Because it wishes it was where Exeter is.