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Really, don't write your own description...

59 replies

MothershipG · 15/04/2013 16:48

Bizarre description, obviously written by the owner of £8m house!

He can't make up his mind if he's writing in the first or third person.

Not my cup of tea but I imagine whoever buys it will change everything anyway.

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TheRealFellatio · 16/04/2013 08:43

Wow - there is some seriously nasty furniture in that house.

He has not written that himself, that is how Fine market their houses. I know - I sold mine through them! They have a professional writer working for them and she phones you up and interviews you or comes to see you in person and does the 'lifestyle magazine spread' shizzle. I hated it, I think it's beyond cheesy, and I asked them ot to do it, but they put pressure on me to trust them and go with it. I refused to let them refer to me by name though - I was just the 'owner'.

But the rest of their marketing, their photos, the way they stage for viewings, their feedback to the client etc, could not be faulted, so I swallowed it, begrudgingly.

I think where this one has fallen down is that it's poorly punctuated, making it unclear who is actually writing the piece.

Luckily my house sold before the formal brochure was even in print so they just bunged a few photos onto Rightmove to show that they'd sold the house (all good exposure) and never bothered with publishing the cheesy write-up. Phew - what a relief!

They swear blind that purchasers love it though. Confused

AgathaF · 16/04/2013 08:53

Wouldn't you know they'd have a hot tub Grin.

Wincher · 16/04/2013 09:00

I can well believe that's what the agent does. We recently sold our flat and the agent asked us to write a short paragraph about the house - so at least that said 'What the owner says'. But then he sent me all the copy to read through and it was full of terrible spelling, grammar and punctuation - I had to totally rewrite it. You would think they would have someone who can actually write ENglish to write a property description?

SoupDragon · 16/04/2013 09:06

An agent in this area does it too - you can spot a Chilcott White house description/photo spread a mile off!

SoupDragon · 16/04/2013 09:10

Having said that, I can't find a poncey description by them Maybe I"ve got the wrong agent. Someone does it, complete with "arty" photos of a half open front door.

titchy · 16/04/2013 09:26

I LOVE Fine's descriptions, but would love to see a truthful one- 'Sheila and John fell in love with the huge kitchen diner where they have hosted many dinner parties for their family and friends. Unfortunately after of of these occasions Sheila found John in flagrante with the neighbours au pair. A bitter divorce battle has ensued and the couple now need to split their assets...'

MothershipG · 16/04/2013 14:21

Grin titchy Post a link if you ever find it.....

OP posts:
elQuintoConyo · 16/04/2013 14:29

Mingerama.

And I don't use that word lightly.

MothershipG · 16/04/2013 14:57

Not Hull, Beaconsfield, west of London, commuter belt.

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