How to get enthusiastic about this new house?!

[anameforahouse]

It was all head over heart.

The new house is in the town we want to live in, DD will get into the school we want her to go to. DP liked it as it has the most potential out of all the houses we saw (we could extend up into loft and out into garden.)

I never liked it particularly but was swayed by DP's ideas about what we could do to it in the future.

We don't have the money to do it up right now though. We have enough to paint, put new carpet in and that's about it.

The rooms are tiny, the kitchen is awful (and we're going to have to live with it for at least a year if not two). It's a modern house, I love period houses. The garden is small and needs major work. I'm not overly keen on the area. I knew all these things before we bought it, but was feeling more positive then.

Why did we buy it? It's the largest house we saw overall in terms of overall space (more rooms than the others, even if small ones!). Great school. Near the sea. The only one we saw really with enough room for us (just!).

People keep asking me if I'm excited. I say I am, but I'm not, I'm miserable. I don't want to show it to anyone!

I'm pregnant atm (due end Feb) and think maybe the hormones are getting to me! I knew all the house's faults before we bought it. It will be our first family home, and realistically, with the budget we had, we knew we had to compromise somewhere.

I think maybe I'm feeling overwhelmed with the amount of work that needs doing.

Can you help me get enthusiastic about this house or is it a lost cause?!

Your house is near the sea? That is my dream!
Modern houses are great. Less maintenance usually.
The garden needs work? Sounds like some exciting designing to be done! I love designing gardens!
It will be freshly painted, with lovely clean carpets. Nice and fresh!
It is good you can't do the majority of the work now. You might make expensive mistakes! You can live in it for a while, work out what needs to be done, and do some long term planning.
Good luck in your new happy family home!

Thanks :)
I suppose it's also that it's just not nearly as nice as our last two homes, which were rented (but we couldn't afford to buy something like them!)

The rooms really are tiny! Once we've put our kingside bed in, I can just about see where a cot and a chest of drawers would go. No room for a wardrobe too, eek! DP and I currently have our clothes in a large wardrobe and 3 chests of drawers!

Fresh paint can do wonders to cheer a place up. And I think you should definitely live in a place for a year before you spend on a new kitchen or extensions, that way you'll know what will work better to improve the house.

I would concentrate on just settling in and making it your own in the same way you would a rental. Once your things are in it- cushions, photos etc it will feel better... Plus who wants builders around a new born!

Also...maybe this is a chance or a push for a bit if a clear out- a wardrobe and 3 chest of drawers is a lot of clothes!!

Is there a loft? All your summer and pre pregnancy clothes could be bagged or boxed and put up there for a while. Do you have under bed drawers? My parents built up their kingsize bed so they have two sets of two drawers on either side.

Changing door fronts or just knobs on kitchen units can help freshen things up as does a rub down and fresh coat of paint.

First off, I am that you have a house by the sea! Lucky, lucky You .

I'd think of it as a kind of fun long-term project. Get a binder and clip ideas and inspiration from magazines for all your dream projects. Is your DH handy? Make a list of little projects he might be able to tackle...you can re-do a backsplash, paint kitchen cabinets and replace hardware, paint walls and put down area rugs as needed. Good Luck!

Thanks for the replies. :)

I have no choice but to chuck a load of stuff out, it simply won't fit!
We don't have drawers, but we have under-bed boxes. (Already full!)
There is a loft.

DD likes it. She keeps wanting to talk about her new room :) (And her new room will be bigger then the one she's in now).

DP is handy and will put the work in I know - when he has time. He has no time at all right now. It's going to have to wait.

Apologies to everyone but I'm just going to keep on wingeing for a bit if that's OK?! In RL I'm putting on a brave face but I almost burst into tears just now (which is not like me at all!)

The kitchen is truly hideous. The walls are textured. It's beige. The kitchen units are possibly 70s? It looks like an unloved cheap office kitchen. It's OK in size, not too small. It has a larder. I like that. I like the stairs too. They're the two bits I do like.

I did wonder about changing the doors. Some friends of a friend are selling a free-standing kitchen, that might work out. There's no point putting a new fitted kitchen in - even if we could afford it - as we'd just take it out when we extend.

"I'd think of it as a kind of fun long-term project." I wish I had the energy to do that. Both of us are so pushed for time, I'm seriously questioning the sanity of taking on a project. We have no time for a project. I already have so little time I never see friends and don't look after myself properly atm. Sorry this is turning into a real pity-fest! I blame the hormones!!

We also have very little money right now, and are in debt. I wish I could go round buying stuff for the house, I'd enjoy that. But we have enough put aside for the essential, boring stuff and that's it.

I know I should be grateful we've got a home and we're on the property ladder, especially when it's so tough right now. We're actually very lucky, I know that. But honestly, I just don't like it. I think I got swayed by all this talk of projects etc. I wish we were moving into a place I was proud to invite people to!

There were a few lovely converted flats. We decided against because we didn't want to deal with expensive leasehold arrangements, and it was the right thing for us. But, honestly, I'm not up for a project. I have no energy! I just want a nice home, and this isn't going to be, not for a long time.

We're not actually moving in till the new year. Must get my head together by then!

OK, just had a look on ebay, and second hand range cookers are much cheaper than I thought they would be. That's cheered me up a bit.

We can have a nice "interim kitchen" (not point in going all out, because of plan to extend later)

If we get a good quality second hand freestanding kitchen, we won't need to pay for it to be fitted. And a nice cooker isn't totally out of our reach. Wonder if we could stretch to it ...

You have my utmost sympathy. House hunting is absolute misery if you live in an area / have an income where what you can pay (which is huge money to you) does not get you what you need, much less what you want. I hated nearly everything we saw and it was awful, but also put on a very brave face as we were very lucky to be in a position to buy at all. So please whinge away. And do feel very sorry for yourself, it is crap to not like the house you are buying. Paint will help, you'll figure something out with the kitchen and new carpets will make a huge difference.

Soz, OP. Didn't mean to be flippant. Nowt wrong with essential boring stuff .

I could almost have written your post, we have bought what we can afford, but I am grateful and there are more positives than negatives, when comparing it to our freezing huge rented house. The room sizes are small, but it is great to be able to be warm! I have started looking at websites re storage for small living spaces - just to get inspiration, it helps to know what can be done with a bit of imagination. We also had three large wardrobes before, now we have a tiny wonky one that doesn't quite fit a clothes hanger!

I don't love where it is, but it is so handy for train, beach, shops etc. I feel like people look down on the area, but I can handle that too. Now we have moved in and are slowly finding a place for everything our own stuff makes it feel like home & I can almost ignore the flowery wallpaper/weird light fittings. I do think it will grow on me. I dread inviting people because it will be a squeeze - it works for our family, but having people to stay will be a struggle.

SrirachaGirl no need to apologise! I know you're absolutely right, just finding it hard to get myself in the right frame of mind.

Oh I wish I could have a drink right now!

TapselteerieO people look down on our new area too!

Nice to hear yours is starting to feel like home, I hope ours does too once we've got our stuff in it.

Our new house isn't half as nice as the one we're leaving though. We're moving from a beautiful Georgian flat with mahoosive rooms and high ceilings in the centre of town, to modern house with small rooms and low ceilings on the edge of town.

The new house has pluses though:

• The mortgage will be cheaper than the rent we've been paying.
• The new house has a garden, an extra bedroom/study and a dining room.
• The new house is near a good school

wendybird77 thanks :)

Can't wait to get rid of the carpets! They're dire! OK floorboards underneath thankfully.

First down size your bed, you need to have clothes in there too, secondly 2 years is a good length to plan for renovations. Permits etc can take ages and you don't want to rush in until you see how rooms do or don't work.

Sounds like you have the cash to make it quite livable if you're considering upgrading a kitchen for 1-2 years.

Get the app houzz. It is addictive but you can search for images for each room of the house or products.

Can't lose the bed! Both DP and I are on the larger side! DD gets into our bed every morning, sometime between 4 and 6 am. And we plan to cosleep with the new baby much of the time. Not sure a king size is actually big enough!

Sorry I should have explained better .,, The kitchen plan I'm toying with is ripping out what's there and replacing with second hand freestanding stuff. Reckon we could do it for maybe about £800 having looked on eBay for 10 minutes (I might be being totally unrealistic about that!). We could then reuse the units in new kitchen. I'm not talking about spending £8k or whatever on a kitchen which would be binned after 2 years!

Will have a look at that app, thanks :)

Well sounds like we might be in similar positions. Fresh paint and polished floors made a huge difference, window dressings and light fittings in rooms that would not be changed were also great. I found until we did these basics it looked dirty.

I haven't got a pic of the actual kitchen, but I wanted to show you how horrible it is.

I typed "horrible 70s kitchen" into Google images, and this imagecame up straight away!

It's not far off, except the one in that image is nicer! The cupboards in ours look more worn. The tiles stop at a couple of feet, and there are beige textured walls. The cooker is crap and freestanding, with an eye level grill on top.

It makes my heart sink to look at it

I expect you're right, it'll look much better once painted. DD is really excited, she can obviously see past what it looks like now!

It's money worries mostly that's really getting to me I think. If we had the money to make it nice, no problem. But I think we're going to have to live with it being horrible for quite some time. And it's going to be hard work living there as there rooms are so small.

You're right, the walls and floors will look much better once done. DP says it's sanding floors is his least favourite job! But we don't have much choice there!

sleeplessinsuburbia have you just moved yourself then? Do you feel differently about it now you've done the work?

Our house had a kitchen like that in when we moved and we had to live with it for four years. To be honest, you kind of stop noticing it after a while. It was WONDERFUL when we could afford to replace it though.
You can look forward to that!

I m reading this thread with a mixture of envy and sympathy. I really want to move in to a do-er upper but am so impatient ill want it all done straight away! Not the same as your situation op, I realise that. I hope you will come to love it once you get there. And forget it over Xmas!

My tip is that I was watching Phils secret agent the other day and someone had textured walls in their kitchen. A builder came and skimmed them off for about £100. Job needs doing in the long term so why do t you get some quotes? That and a kick of paint will be fab!

I've been here a few months,had the floors sanded and polished and all walls painted before moving in.

I cried when we first looked around on the day of settlement now I think it's a really nice modern looking house... If I squint while looking at the kitchen....and ignore the outside which needs cosmetic work.

We'll be doubling the size of our house though so there's a lot to do and meanwhile we're not spending money on things that will go (kitchen).

I'm really excited about the planning and that keeps me motivated. That app is great!

I have no idea when we'll actually be able to do it up properly - the extension etc. It's just "when we can afford it". For one reason and another (which I won't bore you with), we'll have no real idea of what's realistic to plan for for at least 6 months or so. And even if everything pans out finance/work-wise, it'll be at least a year before we could think about affording anything substantial, but I can see it easily being 4 or 5.

I fear we may have to put up with it as it is for quite a long time. But I don't think I can bear living with it as it is for years on end.