Never sold before. Feel utterly clueless and out of depth. Don't even know if we can afford to bloody move. Just want to rant, really

[notnowbernard]

Sorry, bit 'woe is me' there

Think we know what our max. budget is (saw mortgage advisor few days ago, he has 2 products potentially)

Getting 2 valuations on ours next week

But am freaking myself out by looking at 'recently sold' prices in my street as I don't think we're going to sell at the price we need to in order to be able to borrow enough etc etc

God oh God it's a headfuck, isn't it? And we really do have to move, no space blah blah

Anyone else in this situation or with wise words to soothe my nerves?

Probably unnecessary advice, but think carefully.

Would it be feasible to extend/convert the loft etc where you are? Would be stressful and a mess, but many friends have done this as it is far less hassle and expense than taking the next step 'up' the housing ladder.

Next questions: how secure are your jobs/incomes, and how many months living expenses do you have in savings? In this economy, I really wouldn't be mortgaging myself to the hilt so that I was budgeting hard to make payments each month.

Thanks for reply, Earlybird

Absolutely NO option of extending - no room to extend. We're in a flat

My income: super-secure and stable. DP's: variable (self-emp) but generally reliable, and getting better

No savings (would all be put into moving)

Product mortgage guy has in mind makes repayments much higher than we pay now, but manageable (we wouldn't have to 'watch every penny' for example - but would obviously have to tighten belts a tad)

self-pitying bump

NNB - I have gone through something similar.
I was also living in a flat, very nice and in a great location, but really wanted to move for various reason. I talked and thought about it for a couple of years, and finally decided it was now or never... I was doing it alone with a small child, so very daunting. Just moved to new house a few weeks ago.
The whole process is very stressful. I guess the two main things to think about are: firstly, do you really need to move? Secondly, assuming you can sell for the price you want, will you have enough money for the deposit on new house and to pay stamp duty and other moving costs.

Congratulations on your move!

We REALLY have to move (3 kids, 2 beds). No options to extend whatsoever (we would, but there's no scope to)

Have worked out (pretty sure about facts etc) what our budget is - but we'll have to sell at the right price. It all feels like it's really hanging in the balance, IYKWIM - unless we sell at X price, we can't buy at Y - and Y price is what we've got to look at in order to upsize. Anything less and there's sod all about that meets our needs

It's doable. We lived for a year in our two bed with two dc and yes there comes a point where you HAVE to move. Get your valuations and see what you think. You may need to either buy in a less good area or buy something that you can adapt - Big two bed that will allow you to divide a big room in two for example. From an income pov sounds like you're in a good place. The other option is to sell and put your profit (if any) somewhere with a decent yield and then rent for a year or two to get the space you want whilst income/savings stabilise. Buying and selling at once does put you under a lot of pressure.

Ok, it sounds like you do need more space!!!

I think you should go for it (provided you think you will be able to afford the mortgage repayments).

Be prepared for many ups and downs. In my case I lost my first buyer, lost out on a couple of properties after already spending some money on searches, etc.

Would you consider renting out your flat and renting somewhere bigger?

We are in a similarish position. We are talking about moving next year and looking at a bigger house. We dont 'need' to move but at the same time we do.

Have never sold or had people look round a house that we are currently living in which will be a new thing for me/us. I am not sure if I can even do it. And I have two large dogs, so will have to put them in the car or friends house for viewings. Oh it is all such a stress.

Wish I could move into another house and then sell this one, sadly that isnt going to happen; unless I am the next lottery winner.

I agree with NL - you may need to compromise on some things. In my case, I originally looked at some houses that were exactly what I wanted, but not exactly in the right location. I then decided that location was more important to me, so I have bought a house that needs lots of work and is quite small - but has potential. So far from my dream home, but one day hopefully it will be!!!!

Re renting, i think that can be a good option but it depends on the circumstances. That's what I was originally going to do. But didn't because I am in London and my rent for a very small two bedroom flat was going to be a lot more than my mortgage repayments. Also, I wanted to transport my existing mortgage.

Just wanted to add that it used to be that you could rent something a lot nicer and bigger than what you would be able to buy, for the same cost per month. But that's no longer true in most parts of the UK.

@NNB Remember to factor in other costs. You need to pay EA fees, Stamp Duty, mortgage fees, solicitors fees and survey. Plus the costs of actually moving.

Good luck on the valuations. I think you'll have your answer once you've talked to the EA.

@Jax Regarding the process of selling - the best thing is if you aren't there for viewings IMO. Just let your agents do the viewings and go out. You can tell your agent they can't do viewings when you aren't there to move the dogs.

I'm in the same boat- ea's been today. I was cheeky and told both of them when they told me fees were 1.5 the other had offered 1.25 so both offered now 1.25

Just deciding who to go with

Helpful thread, thanks everyone

Renting absolutely not an option - even if we 'mortgaged to the hilt' the rent on a 3-bed in the area we want would cost us more each month. Seriously...1,100 at least to rent where we are

Akandra - all those costs were factored in when the mortgage guy did his calculations (he said to allow 10k which he took from equity of our current place)

Shit, I am so naive about all this. Always get the feeling I'm being shafted

Ooh do tell me abot EA fees and how to negotiate them!

am NOT good at this sort of thing, btw. Will need to know what I'm talking about

For the fee, just ask for less. By the time you have had a couple round, you will get an idea of the range. You can negotiate on the day or later when you make your decision. Ours was 1.25% and would not drop it lower, but they were the lowest to start with.

It's not just the fee - it's also about the tie in. As it happens, my agent had both the lowest fee and the shortest tie in. Ours was only 2 weeks!!! Another was 2 months.

A short tie in means a confident agent or an agent you can get shot of if they turn out to be crap. Either way, it's a good thing.

Thanks - hadn't considered the tie-in thing. Got an EA coming this pm and another one tomorrow to do valuation. Won't talk fees etc until we know for certain we can afford the move

Also thinking of waiting until NY to actually put it on - thoughts of people coming round to view over the Christmas hols with 3 kids bouncing off the walls will send me over the edge

I'm watching this with interest as I'm in a similar position. I have two estate agents coming over this afternoon, having had one over yesterday, and have seen the house I have to buy. I've never bought or sold before - DH had our flat when we met and am, frankly, more than a little terrified of the numbers we're banding about.

The EA we had over yesterday gave me a discount on his normal fee (from 2.5% to 2%) without me even asking, so I think I'll be using his "20% reduction in fees" to try to coerce the other agents (who I think will be better for us) to reduce their fee. The way I see it I won't be in a worse position if they say no.

Has anyone done a sliding fee scale? I am tempted with the agent I like, who will give us a higher valuation, to say I'll do the 2.5% if he gets the top price for it, but only 2% if he gets what the other agents will market it for - thus incentivising him to get me the best price. I guess I'll know if they're willing to take on terms like this after our meeting this afternoon.

Re your position on finance - is it worth speaking to another advisor if your finances aren't quite matching what you need at the moment?

Wow. You are way ahead of me re this negotiating lark [impressed]. They must see me and think I've come down in the last shower or something...

This is the 2nd person we've seen re mortgage. 1st was crap. This one I was impressed by, seemed honest (I felt), gave us the pros and cons to various scenarios, didn't hassle us, told us to go away and weigh everything up properly before making a decision etc. Most importantly, I came away feeling informed

Good luck this pm! Must feel very tense when you've already seen somewhere you love

I asked both ea's about fees. Both told me 1.5 I the Said the other quoted 1.25 and they both agreed to match!

How much does the energy thing cost quotes have you had? I've got 1 quote so far of £50

We moved in Sept, having had 2 (small) DC in 2-bed, and extended as much as we could, so know just what you mean about needing but not needing to move! Our energy thing cost £70. Got 2 EAs to quote and they offered 1% and 0.65%. Both local agents rather than nationals.

If you're not already logging onto www.rightmove.co.uk/ then it's a great place to see what's available and how quickly things move.

Good luck!

Well I didn't even have to ask the first one - he came up with a cracking valuation and said if they didn't get within £50k of it he'd reduce the commission by 0.5%! Wow! The next one has to be good to beat him.

I need either a drink or a little lie down - possibly both!

No need for a sliding scale. The agent gets more if they sell it for more anyway.

% are not comparable across the country from what I have read on here, but you are are likely to find a spread in the agents you get round. Get at least 3 round to quote you.

We made a day of it. It was quite fun. My husband apparently has the best poker face EVER. And the last agent just could not figure out why he wasn't managing to sell his deal. You could see it in his face (he valued less, wanted a higher fee, wanted a tie in that was at least 4 times the agent we went with and totally lacked the conviction of either of the other two).

I got a sliding scale with last sale - I thought that the EA had overvalued compared to others, but had higher fees, so we negotated 1% under £220k, which was the valuation and fee that others had quoted and I thought was realistic, but 1.25% over that. They sold it for us for £236k in the end, so we got more money than we expected and they got their original commission. Worked for us!

That's what we've done Amaris. He's given us a commission of 1.5% for under the valuation other agents gave us (on commission of 2.5%) and 2% if he goes over. Not sure whether he will achieve the high price, but we're paying less than with other agents even if we get the highest valuation, and his staff/company get a better bonus if they achieve more, which is money we never expected to see so we don't mind paying a bit more out in commission.