Thanks all, funnily enough I did go to the WC open day last week and was very pleasantly surprised - I also really liked it. Didn't see any evidence of the problems of the past and the head seems very confident that they will get a good+ ofsted next year. Unfortunately they are 2 form entry and already half full with sibs for next year apparently so I don't think we stand much chance there either as not that near. We are going to put it on our (utterly pointless, seemingly) form for state though.
Also went to visit Hawthorns and liked it, DH not quite so keen. Now wavering between RsM and Hawthorns for private and have pretty much accepted we will be going down that route.
Also went to see a small school caled Oakhyrst Grange that DH really liked, near Hawthorns, if anyone has any thoughts there. They have space for pre-school equivalent (lower Kindergarten) in January so am strongly considering that (as couldn't get ds into pre-school in Reigate and he is getting bored at day nursery as per my other posts).
Just to give you an idea of what I am up against for state, here is the patronising response the LEA sent to a local official who asked a question about the distance measurement on my behalf:
"We have to be careful with advice - parents/carers should make their own decisions, but we can indicate consequences.
If she selects oversubscribed schools, then she should take account of distance being measured by a straight line, not using travel distance along roads. A lot depends on how oversubscribed the school is as to her chances - I would advise she asks the schools how far away they took children and if any lived near her to estimate her chances. (I presume she is going to visit the schools.) [ER YES, I HAVE VISITED A TOTAL OF 10, SOME TWICE, WOULD I REALLY BE ASKING THESE QUESTIONS IF I WASN'T THE TYPE OF PARENT TO DO THEIR RESEARCH??) We don't know where potential reception children live, so we always say that we can only indicate what happened in the past and not guarantee anything. Schools, however, have a better feel as they can normally identify siblings and know where they live.
If it seems unlikely she would get a place at her 3 preference schools, then she does run the risk of being diverted to the next school with places - currently Salfords is the 'overflow' school. She should think carefully whether Sandcross Primary ought to be one of her preferences."
I still can't believe it is easier to get your children into private schools than even adequate state ones here - shocking. There are only 5 in our area (i.e the town we live in, is it so unreasonable to want to go to school there?) and we would be quiet happy with at least 3 of them which I don't think is too picky and yet, they are telling us we need to "choose" a failing one which is about to be merged with another school to rescue it or get sent to one I have never heard of miles away that is not even in the town in which we live. Rant over.
Have calmed down a bit now we have options for next year. Thanks everyone.
Interested to hear more opinions. I have been to so many schools now and considered so many options that I am starting to find it hard to distinguish between them. I suppose you have to say we are lucky to live in an area with so many good school options.