I need help. I’m utterly distraught and upset with my sons school, does anyone have any advice?

[mummytorands]

So I’ve been awake all night with keeping my 8 year old as comfortable as possible and yesterday’s events and I wanted to go to the school today and complain about how they handled things but I think I’m going to write to the chair of governors instead so I want to box clever.

So, I leave work yesterday (I work 10 minutes from the school by car) at 2:45 my children are usually let out at 3:10-3:20. School call at 2:50 telling me my son (8) has had a fall during playtime she explained he hurt his arm, elbow hip and knee. He was grazed seen by first aid but very upset and could I get him early of course I said yes I’ll be 5 minutes. Asked then as it’s unusual for him to be as upset as she was saying as he’s quite a tough cookie has he done any damage. No she said first aid moved his arm but seems ok but he’s very upset and think it’s best you came early and that she would get my daughter for me too (5). I pull up to school a TA is bringing them both out and it was quite evident to me we needed to get to hospital. I could clearly see my son was in pain, he was holding his arm, his wrist and hand were limp. I was given no accident form but didn’t think about that until later as my main concern was to get him medical attention. I called minor injuries they said they had a 3 hour wait and they wouldn’t be able to xray today so off to a&e I went which was heaving but we were dealt with pretty swiftly. Xray and he’s broken both radius and ulna and one of the fractures is going into the growth plate. I won’t know the full extent until we see the fracture clinic in 24 hours however we were sent home in a plaster cast and sling and I’ve kept him comfortable with calpol alternating nurofen. My plan is to go into school tomorrow asking for the accident book copy but I want to see it and not have it done and back dated. I will tell them he won’t be in for the next couple of days until I know more but I’m not disclosing the damage he’s done until I know for definite.

I am furious. He very clearly to me had broken his arm the moment I seen him. She played it down to me on the phone and his arm had been manipulated and it should not have been. They did not contact me fast enough and no accident from was given. Does anyone have advice? I want to complain because I’m just so unhappy about the handling and I don’t want it to happen again but I want the first aid training to be looked into also. My poor boy.

Good point. Op hope you are not playing out in front of your child how you are posting on this thread.

Not to mention taking the ambulance away from someone who actually needs it. Some people are ridiculous

This thread sums up why I refuse to go on first aid training. I'm not putting myself in the firing line.

If the accident happened just as the child walked into school in the morning and school didn’t call until nearly home time and it was obvious the arm was broken, then there would be cause for complaint. But sounds like they phoned straight away.

I remember when one of my friend’s child had an accident at school in Primary school Had made an awful mess of her face. Mum was called straight away but not all details given to her on the phone. Before her DD was brought to her in school reception she was told to brace herself as it looked awful. It was just cuts and bruises and my friend took her to minor injuries to get her checked over, and all was fine

If you chose to complain to the school, please follow the complaints policy which should be on the website. Be very clear about your complaint and what you want them to do to resolve it. There is absolutely no point in writing straight to the governors - they can’t get involved until you have been through the complaints process.

Distraught is so bloody dramatic here.
The teachers and TA’s in a school are not doctors, they don’t have xray eyes.
Your son was playing and broke his arm, it happens.
They phoned you to tell you he had an accident, what more do you want from them?

This must be very upsetting for your boy and yourself. You need to let the dust settle and then think about what outcome you want. Is it better training for staff? I bet they want that too. It costs money though. Do you want someone punished for a mistake? Sacked? Or are you requiring financial compensation? Your actions will depend on your desired outcome. Personally I would want a chat with the head about what happened and a suggestion of getting a first aid course refresher for the designated staff member. No need for anger. FWIW my daughter had two very serious accidents in school. But that is what they were - accidents.

Yes it has. It assessed his injury, which probably involved getting him to wiggle his fingers to assess check – this presumably is what OP is referring to when she says his arm was manipulated – and called a parent to pick him up early. It is the responsibility of parents to seek hospital treatment for something like this, not school's. If it had been more serious no doubt they'd have called an ambulance.

Disagree Grey. Not sure it would help to have all the adults ranting and raving like op is. The “minimising” is surely to keep everyone calm and safe. Is a broken limb a time critical emergency anyway? Am not a medic but have spent many hours in A&E waiting on treatment for broken limbs with kids and there’s no sense of urgency there.

I’ve re-read the OP.

The school actually said the boy had done no damage and was just upset.

This is not acceptable.

They should have seen he needed to be checked by a Dr and told OP to take him to A&E.

Thank God OP ignored the school. A different Mother may not have

The school clearly have lessons to learn here.

No wonder teachers are leaving in their droves.

Complete and utter hyperbolic nonsense from you OP.

Your kid has an accident, you were contacted to collect him and get him medical attention.

He has a broken arm, he’s not going to die. Maybe check out the thread from the woman who’s baby is terminal in the PICU to remind you to count your blessings and get a bit of
perspective.

Doctors will move an arm or ask a kid to straighten it to see if there is damage.

You are projecting your kids injury ok the school. I agree with others. It sucks but the schools aren’t doctors and asked you to come and get him and take him.

You don’t call an ambulance for a broken limb so they called you.

Accidents happen and kids unfortunately break things while playing. Focus on your kid and not on blaming someone.

I have been to A&E many times for suspected broken limbs that needed X-rays. A consultant told us that they have had young kids yelling and screaming, swelling and bruising with no broken bones. They have had other young kids who came in seemingly okay and had major fractures.

I get you are upset it happened but it was an accident. Focus on your kid.

For real?? They are a school. They aren’t allowed to operate without licensed first aid people? ? I’m not a doctor but my work place has several first aider staff on each floor and we are just an office, we haven’t legally committed to looking after a few hundred children! They haven’t followed any of their procedures, they are either dimwits or they’ve lied to her, and she should rightly be furious.

I have never had a accident form from dds school. Even when she has been sent home early. If it needed your signature they clearly didn't get it. Read the school accident policy. Your first step is cross checking that. I'm a governor and I'm happy to talk informly with parents but I couldn't take a direct complaint on with any robustness as it's not following the complaints policy. Something like this I'd talk to the relevant governor ( I'm not chair) take advice, advise you to go to the HT. If you didn't follow my advice I'd do no more as I'm powerless too. I have parent raise issues with me, I've gone to the relevant governor who has talked the head but the parent never reports any of these issues properly or firmly in writing. So ultimately they aren't even logged. There's zero paper trail

If the school had rang and said you son is in lots of pain and has maybe broken his arm that would have made you rush and caused lots of distress. They kept it calm. They couldn't really do much else.

They should have assessed him as it had happened , fall , pain guarding a limb needs looking at asap not 3/4 hours after
i winder if they are properly first aid trained

Take a breath before reacting. It’s hard as a parent to see our children in pain and feel like you should have been there.

It happened at the end of the day, they didn’t want to panic you and knew you would be close to do the school run. If it happened at 9:30 and they waited all day then maybe I could see why you would want to be annoyed but other than the form then I think they did everything they could do. They are not qualified doctors or superman with x-ray vision.

Focus on your son and rationally ask for forms etc. The school person who did look after him will be concerned and will be upset to also know he has a broken bones. They did all the checks that was needed. Don’t panic your son or he may think he did something wrong.

Please try and separate your feelings here. You’re distraught this has happened, not at the school. You could ask them why they didn’t identify a possible break and to review their first aid training as they should not have moved it, this is constructive and totally within reason.

Look, when you need to use invented hyperbole to make your case, you have lost your case.

No ranting or raving would be needed by the school to say ‘ Your child needs to be checked by A&E’. It’s absurd to oretend saying this is ‘ranting and raving’ 🙄. my son’s nursery were very calm telling me exactly this!

The school told OP there was no damage and he needed to go home as he was upset. There were wrong about that, and very wrong to give that diagnosis.

If OP could see her son needed to be checked by A&E the school should have too.

The school needs to learn from this.

Why do you think it was 3 or 4 hours after? It probably happened during afternoon playtime, usually around 2.15-2.30ish.

I'd be concerned about what caused the accident. Bone fractures should not be routinely happening at play time.

Accidents happen op - try and lose the anger, it doesn't happen anywhere. Schools are not medical professionals, they wouldn't have known it was broken

@Codlingmoths That poster said "they are not doctors." True. They did. It say there were no first-aid-trained people on the premises.
Which procedures are you suggesting the school did not follow? Frankly, you have no idea; even the OP doesn't, at this point.
You are whipping up hysteria and this is unfortunately what many schools are having to deal with nowadays and why staff retention is such an issue. Who would willingly put themselves in the firing line of "furious" parents attacking them for trying to do the right thing (and we have no evidence this wasn't the case here).

When they say ‘go home’ they mean - ‘leave school’. It’s not a school’s job to tell parents what to do once a child leaves school.

Honestly things that happen to our kids are not always someone else’s responsibility.

What else could the school do here? You’d never get an ambulance for a kids broken arm here. And who would take him? Last time a friend I was with was assessed as needing an ambulance urgently I was asked to get him a taxi at 1am (I took him in the end) as they wait would have put him at risk of death.

School called mum, she went to A&E. 3 hours would be a short wait in this area. Medical treatment received.

I have no idea how the OP thinks this could have happened any differently. I broke my arm twice aged 9 & 13 - in both cases there was a delay getting me to A&E - and first one required operating and a week long hospital stay.

What’s the anger about? There shouldn’t be any in this situation. Let alone directed at school who followed their policy.

But people know there own child and how they react better than the school, my son is prone is being overly dramatic when he does something like stubbing his toe he is distraught saying he needs to go to hospital, strangely when he’s had more major injuries he’s been calm. The school haven’t forbidden the mother from taking her son to a and e