I need help. I’m utterly distraught and upset with my sons school, does anyone have any advice?

[mummytorands]

So I’ve been awake all night with keeping my 8 year old as comfortable as possible and yesterday’s events and I wanted to go to the school today and complain about how they handled things but I think I’m going to write to the chair of governors instead so I want to box clever.

So, I leave work yesterday (I work 10 minutes from the school by car) at 2:45 my children are usually let out at 3:10-3:20. School call at 2:50 telling me my son (8) has had a fall during playtime she explained he hurt his arm, elbow hip and knee. He was grazed seen by first aid but very upset and could I get him early of course I said yes I’ll be 5 minutes. Asked then as it’s unusual for him to be as upset as she was saying as he’s quite a tough cookie has he done any damage. No she said first aid moved his arm but seems ok but he’s very upset and think it’s best you came early and that she would get my daughter for me too (5). I pull up to school a TA is bringing them both out and it was quite evident to me we needed to get to hospital. I could clearly see my son was in pain, he was holding his arm, his wrist and hand were limp. I was given no accident form but didn’t think about that until later as my main concern was to get him medical attention. I called minor injuries they said they had a 3 hour wait and they wouldn’t be able to xray today so off to a&e I went which was heaving but we were dealt with pretty swiftly. Xray and he’s broken both radius and ulna and one of the fractures is going into the growth plate. I won’t know the full extent until we see the fracture clinic in 24 hours however we were sent home in a plaster cast and sling and I’ve kept him comfortable with calpol alternating nurofen. My plan is to go into school tomorrow asking for the accident book copy but I want to see it and not have it done and back dated. I will tell them he won’t be in for the next couple of days until I know more but I’m not disclosing the damage he’s done until I know for definite.

I am furious. He very clearly to me had broken his arm the moment I seen him. She played it down to me on the phone and his arm had been manipulated and it should not have been. They did not contact me fast enough and no accident from was given. Does anyone have advice? I want to complain because I’m just so unhappy about the handling and I don’t want it to happen again but I want the first aid training to be looked into also. My poor boy.

I'm a head teacher. We have to report all accidents where a child or staff member attends hospital to RIDDOR. It's policy in every school I have worked at.

Sorry, but what did they do differently there, apart from pre-pay the taxi? OP had a car, she didn’t need a taxi.

I once worked with a surgeon who tripped on his morning run into work andhobbled in on what he thought was a sprain, only to find out he had broken his ankle. Likewise my brother hobbled about on a broken foot for two days after attending minor injuries, before my mum (a nurse) decided he was in far too much pain for it just to be a sprain. The same mum who broke her humerus, just thought she had knocked her arm and bruised it a bit, and only attended A and E when she woke up the next morning and could feel the bone moving.

My point is bones get broken all the time and not immediately recognised, and get moved and jiggled around lots before they become immobilised. It sounds like the TA was trying to hold it steady as best she could.
By all means ask for a debrief, OP, but I don’t see what they could have done differently procedurally. “Box clever” suggest there may have already been a breakdown of trust between you and the school- do you have any reason to think they wouldn’t be able to handle what must be a relatively common occurrence on school grounds?
I hope your wee boy feels better soon, and you do too- it must have been a shock for both of you.

Op, you're getting a hard time here. Probably not what you needed after day you'd had. Your poor son! And you, the shock you must have had when you first saw him.

But, they're right. I think the school did ok in the circumstances. Being angry about the accident book/note is misplaced. They (rightly) saw to your son over paperwork in the immediate aftermath. The only thing you could be annoyed wuth is if it happened 3 hours before they called you, and even then, these are basic first aiders who will see almost every kid with a hurt arm or a graze over the course of their time at the school: most will never see a broken arm.

Try and see things rationally today.

To all those saying, ‘well even a doctor finds it hard to diagnose a fracture’.
The school did not have to diagnose a fracture!
People don’t go to A&E when they or their mate Bob has diagnosed them!
They go to A&E when there is cause for concern.
Its sounds obvious there was cause for concern here. If OP could see that immediately there is no excuse for the school to have not seen this.

The proof of the pudding is in the eating. The facts of the case are that this was an A&E case and the school did not recognize this. This needs to be fed back to the school so they can learn from it.

This happened to my son's friend at primary. Broken arm and what did the teachers do? Started moving it around. It's basic first aid to support not try to move a clearly limp arm. First aid is woeful in schools. I'd be furious too OP, surprised they didn't slap a paper towel on it.

Many people turn up to a and e convinced their limbs are broken when they are nit and vice versa. School cannot know it is broken. They gave first aid and called you early because it wasn't improving. Accident forms are filled in later. There is nothing to be gained from that side. You need to take a breath and stop looking for blame. He fell down. He hurt himself. They called you. I am not sure what you are thinking.

What are you hoping to achieve OP? They aren’t doctors and I think they did the right thing by calling you. Accidents happen and it’s rare that children go through childhood without breaking a bone at some point.

Please consider what your actions could do to someone in their job.

Focus on your son for now. In a few weeks contact the school requesting a meeting
You need time to become more objective and to gather any necessary information. You are emotionally driven ATM and you will benefit from waiting to see the final outcome with your son.

Actually they can call an ambulance and if necessary send him to A&E with someone from school! School act in loco parentis. What would they have done if they couldn’t have got hold of mum for any reason and he was going to after school club? Just sent him? No they’re not doctors but common sense would say this was not just a simple fall in the playground!

I called an ambulance last month when an elderly man had fallen on the high street. It was so cold, people were bringing blankets and putting woolly hats on his hands. The ambulance came after three and a half hours by which time he was almost frozen. Imagine lying for hours on a cold pavement in February.

We use meditracker and send an email to parents when we log the incident.
the school called you. You wouldn’t believe the amount of drama kids can produce even with very minor incidents so it’s often hard to make the call as it whether it is more serious.
The school did nothing wrong. They are not doctors.
Hope your ds feels better soon.

What difference does a bit of paper make?

Sometimes the full extent of injuries are not immediately apparent. I personally wouldn't be raging about the accident form, but when I called to inform the school of his absence and why, I would ask what happened exactly and why I wasn't told sooner.

Ultimately, it doesn't change anything, does it?

That's my original thought. As in, it would look terrible if he was injured at morning playtime or even lunchtime and left it several hours/couple hours.

Was he within earshot when she called you? Maybe she didn't want to alarm him.

She was maybe scared OP, it can be quite scary if you think a child has hurt himself.

She maybe knew an ambulance would take a long time to come.

What they did differently, crucially differently, was immediately recognize my son needed to go to A&E, communicate that clearly to me, and book a taxi to make sure we went there. And went ASAP. And his accident was more minor than OP’s son.
They made sure I took my cue from them.
OPs son is lucky his Mum ignored the school’s minimizing and took him to A&E. Another Mother could have taken their lead from the minimization of the school and taken their son home to rest.

The school failed to spot this boy needed to go to A&E. They did not need to diagnose him, they just needed to see there was sufficient cause for concern to take him to A&E. They failed to see that and they need to learn from it.

Adults can ignore their own injury as much as they choose. A school should not be ignoring injury in a child. Your examples of ‘difficult to spot’ injuries are irrelevant. OP spotted signs of serious injury straight away that the hospital quickly confirmed. This was not an edge case, but one that was clear enough for the school to have seen there was cause for concern too.

Direct your anger into gratitude that your son has received good medical care. Accidents happen. The school is not to blame.

OP hasn’t said which playtime though? Some schools do have afternoon playtimes so it could have happened 15 minutes before they called her. There is no indication how long school waited to call Mum.

I thought that you were supposed to splint a suspected fracture!

The concern I would think is how long before they called.

Depending on what happened you'd think a fracture might have been suspected.

Sounds like you’ve had a terrible shock, you’re worried about your son’s arm and haven’t had much sleep. You’re angry because he’s hurt and you want to protect him. It’s a natural reaction.

Today, I’d focus on your son.

As for how the school handled it, is your main frustration that they were slow to contact you? If so, I’m unclear of the timeline. What time is playtime? It seems to me they called you pretty quickly (10-15 mins) after he’d had the accident. Initially, there may have been a lot of kids around him and they have to get him inside and sat down, consider how bad it is, then find your number.

I agree it may not have been wise to manipulate his arm if it’s badly fractured. If he was in that much pain, I can’t imagine they could move it much. And it may not have caused further damage. I suggest asking at the fracture clinic today. Ask your son to show them with his other arm how they moved it.

Then, in a couple of days, once you’ve recovered from the shock and had some sleep, consider how to approach the school. Check their complaints procedure and follow that. I’d politely suggest their first aid policy and practice might need a review because it was very clear he was in a lot of pain and his arm was limp. So, they should have suspected it was fractured and (if the fracture clinic say so), should not have tried to move his arm.

Ask your son who gave first aid and moved his arm. If it was a TA, perhaps the school need to make sure a more senior member of staff has oversight of potentially serious first aid incidents or (as you say) they need to refresh their first aid training.

What they did differently, crucially differently, was immediately recognize my son needed to go to A&E, communicate that clearly to me, and book a taxi to make sure we went there.

The thing is, many parents do not want schools telling them what they should do with their own children.

Are you sure the parents don’t get a copy, my sons school has some sort of online logging thing and I get an email with brief details, it looks automated

It should really have been done more or less straightaway though really. Like I say, I wouldn’t go mad about it (I’m not suggesting the op would) but I wouldn’t say the school behaved impeccably either, with the caveat that balls do get dropped in a busy school day.

My kid got her finger sliced off at the top joint in a door at school in November. They did call an ambulance and were given an 8 hour response time because, quite rightly, it’s prioritised fairly low down, along with broken arms.

They called me and downplayed so as to not panic me, although telling me about the ambulance kinda gave it away.

Kids have accidents. The fury is wasted. Energy is better spent helping your child recover.

What they did differently, crucially differently, was immediately recognize my son needed to go to A&E, communicate that clearly to me, and book a taxi to make sure we went there

Why did they book a taxi if you’d driven in to get him?

Yes I’d rather school didn’t sent me to a and e in a taxi when I had a car available it’s ok on the way but it means then having to book and wait for a taxi on way home possibly late and night, and then arrange pick up own car from school car park which is possibly locked by then

Sorry op but you sound like an utter drama llama. Accidents happen. Agree with the majority what else could they have done? And I speak as a mother of older teens who between them have had 3 breaks over the years all due to sports.

A lovely friends son has a nasty head injury at primary and the head actually took him to hospital. The poor head was terrified of my friends reaction when she met them there being used to parents like op fortunately for him she’s a medic herself and very pragmatic and calm and knew her son was the clumsiest kid ever!