I need help. I’m utterly distraught and upset with my sons school, does anyone have any advice?

[mummytorands]

So I’ve been awake all night with keeping my 8 year old as comfortable as possible and yesterday’s events and I wanted to go to the school today and complain about how they handled things but I think I’m going to write to the chair of governors instead so I want to box clever.

So, I leave work yesterday (I work 10 minutes from the school by car) at 2:45 my children are usually let out at 3:10-3:20. School call at 2:50 telling me my son (8) has had a fall during playtime she explained he hurt his arm, elbow hip and knee. He was grazed seen by first aid but very upset and could I get him early of course I said yes I’ll be 5 minutes. Asked then as it’s unusual for him to be as upset as she was saying as he’s quite a tough cookie has he done any damage. No she said first aid moved his arm but seems ok but he’s very upset and think it’s best you came early and that she would get my daughter for me too (5). I pull up to school a TA is bringing them both out and it was quite evident to me we needed to get to hospital. I could clearly see my son was in pain, he was holding his arm, his wrist and hand were limp. I was given no accident form but didn’t think about that until later as my main concern was to get him medical attention. I called minor injuries they said they had a 3 hour wait and they wouldn’t be able to xray today so off to a&e I went which was heaving but we were dealt with pretty swiftly. Xray and he’s broken both radius and ulna and one of the fractures is going into the growth plate. I won’t know the full extent until we see the fracture clinic in 24 hours however we were sent home in a plaster cast and sling and I’ve kept him comfortable with calpol alternating nurofen. My plan is to go into school tomorrow asking for the accident book copy but I want to see it and not have it done and back dated. I will tell them he won’t be in for the next couple of days until I know more but I’m not disclosing the damage he’s done until I know for definite.

I am furious. He very clearly to me had broken his arm the moment I seen him. She played it down to me on the phone and his arm had been manipulated and it should not have been. They did not contact me fast enough and no accident from was given. Does anyone have advice? I want to complain because I’m just so unhappy about the handling and I don’t want it to happen again but I want the first aid training to be looked into also. My poor boy.

You can fall over and break a bone. Children run and jump in the playground. Sometimes they fall. Sometimes - not often but sometimes - they break a bone. It can't be prevented entirely. I'm not sure what your problem is?

And I don't think anyone would want a staff member from a school to take their child to A&E rather than take them there themselves.

@Greycatblueeyes they didn't say no damage. Look again at the OP. They said he had hurt his arm. They aren't qualified (and as other posters have said probably aren't allowed to speculate even) to diagnose what sort of hurt.

They called her at 2.50 (I think it says in the OP). School finished at 3.15. Play could easily have been around 2.15. Allow time for assessment and phoning and that time line works.

No, it's not. It sounds like the school did everything they should. People who expect an ideal world where children never fall over and break bones, or ambulances turn up at the drop of a hat for every little injury - that's the problem here.

You can bet those are the same people who would moan the most about their taxes going up.

@ThatOtherAustenSister how can you possibly know whether there was afternoon play for KS2? There may not be at yours. I know lots of schools still have one though. There may but have been at this particular one either, of course, but how can you say outright that there won't have been?

Green stick fractures are not uncommon in children of that age. They are not qualified to X-ray for a broken arm. They recognised he was in pain and asked you to collect him. What did you want them to do?

@ThatOtherAustenSister it's you that don't understand double negatives.
Wasn't told not to means nobody said don't take her.
To make it mean was told to it would have to be something like wasn't not told, though even that doesn't quite work.
Not all sentences with two negatives in them are a straight double negative.

You can fall over and break a bone. Children run and jump in the playground. Sometimes they fall. Sometimes - not often but sometimes - they break a bone. It can't be prevented entirely. I'm not sure what your problem is?

I don't have to agree with you. And I don't.

They called her, and asked her to come immediately.
They called her immediately and asked her to come.
Can you see how the placing of ‘immediately’ changes the meaning of the sentence?
She said they called her at 2.50pm which was 20 - 30 minutes before home time. She doesn’t say when playtime was. Having experience of similar accidents in school as SLT, it could be a while before a parent gets called. If a child has fallen at break time, it could be 10/15/20+ minutes before it’s determined that the accident is serious enough for a parent to be called to collect their child. Then someone has to make that call - often it’s admin staff, who may have only partial info.

Very, very few state schools have a school nurse on site. Some share one amongst a group of schools with the nurse being available say one day a week in each. I e been a teacher for 35 years in schools in both England and Wales, private and state. The only one with an on site 'nurse' was a private boarding school which had a san for boarders - and for a long time that was staffed by an ex paramedic, not a nurse.

How do you think a child is likely to fracture their ulna? Are you suggesting someone got hold of the Dcs arm and snapped it???

Clearly not 🙄🙄🙄

Yeah

It is so difficult isn’t it.

If the teacher had asked him privately or they had phoned/emailed me to let me know what we had happened, we could have dealt with it at 9.40am and not 3.40pm.

Just the thought of him at school all day in pain is horrible.

Similar happened with my young child, OP.
You have my sympathies as it’s a very distressing time for all. I would gently advise you to take 24 hours to process what has happened and focus on reintegrating your child back in to school safely with his injuries.
I would be asking for a copy of the accident form but I wouldn’t be trying to catch anyone out. Presumably it’s a good thing that the immediate focus was on your child’s care over and above filling out a report.
Accidents happen, unfortunately. If you still feel uneasy I would request a quick sit down with the school to discuss your concerns as sometimes a bit of extra accountability is reassuring.
Hope your child’s injury heals well

I would be upset if they hadn’t called but they did, I’d always want to be contacted and me make the call on what to do next with my child unless it’s an emergency situation.

I understand the anger and upset you feel but do take a while before going in hot headed as it may have a lasting impact on your relationship with the school.

I had a similar phone call, similar timings (a good hour or so after the event), when I arrived my DD was sat with her arm clearly out place wrapped up in a teachers scarf. I could publish a book with the amount of accident slips over the years but I didn’t get one on this occasion, didn’t even cross my mind. Went straight to A&E, again even though she had been checked by First Aid who didn’t think it was broke, and she had broken bone in her arm and fractured elbow. TBF, despite the pain she loved the attention she got in the following weeks. Yes it was a pain and unfortunate for her to have her arm in a cast during the Easter holiday but it could not have been prevented. If the school had phoned for an ambulance or taken her to hospital prior to me would have been more traumatic!

Like others have said, wait a few days to relax, go to the fracture clinic, if it’s a natural heal then great (if operating is needed then I imagine that would be different). If you feel there are ways the school could prevent/manage/improve, suggest them without conflict in the first instance.

Think you’re over reacting tbh. They probably didn’t want to worry you on the phone.

What time is playtime at? Playtime where I’m at is at 10:30-10:45 so I would be furious if my dc had been left that long with a clearly broken arm. If playtime was after 2pm I would be less annoyed as they have contacted you in a reasonable time.

Light the touch paper and watch it burn .....

This.
no point beibg angry at school if just did it
butni ready they say it was done at break, and then you were only notified just before home time. So, I assume that’s at least 1 hour he’s been in pain and they’d not called you

re manipulation. I once slipped badly onto arm and elbow. Went to A&E (at work so they made me go) occ health thought I’d done something serious so got taken by work immedately. Hospital doctor I saw in A&E manipulated it , got me to move it, said it wasn’t broken and sent me on my way. I drove home 300 miles next day (I was away at different site) in absolute agony. 3 days later saw work physio, who sent me back to different A&E with a note to say “X-ray her this time” . And yep broken my elbow and arm.

so, OP, it isn’t obvious even to A&E when breaks happen. You can’t blame school for not spotting. Not their job.

It is their job though, that if in any doubt, with a kid who doesn’t bounce back very quickly (in 10 mins) in terms of pain and distress, to call you immedately. Seems like they wasted an hour plus thinking your dc was making a fuss

The point was, you said "the OP said her son was clearly in obvious agony", which was untrue as she didn’t say that at all. I note that you haven’t acknowledged your error.

I was pointing out that even though the poor child was in pain, that didn’t necessarily indicate that he had a fracture or needed urgent hospital treatment.

And how do you know they didn’t document anything? Many schools record accidents electronically these days. In any case, as a parent I would hope their immediate priority would be to look after my child rather than fill in documentation!