I need help. I’m utterly distraught and upset with my sons school, does anyone have any advice?

[mummytorands]

So I’ve been awake all night with keeping my 8 year old as comfortable as possible and yesterday’s events and I wanted to go to the school today and complain about how they handled things but I think I’m going to write to the chair of governors instead so I want to box clever.

So, I leave work yesterday (I work 10 minutes from the school by car) at 2:45 my children are usually let out at 3:10-3:20. School call at 2:50 telling me my son (8) has had a fall during playtime she explained he hurt his arm, elbow hip and knee. He was grazed seen by first aid but very upset and could I get him early of course I said yes I’ll be 5 minutes. Asked then as it’s unusual for him to be as upset as she was saying as he’s quite a tough cookie has he done any damage. No she said first aid moved his arm but seems ok but he’s very upset and think it’s best you came early and that she would get my daughter for me too (5). I pull up to school a TA is bringing them both out and it was quite evident to me we needed to get to hospital. I could clearly see my son was in pain, he was holding his arm, his wrist and hand were limp. I was given no accident form but didn’t think about that until later as my main concern was to get him medical attention. I called minor injuries they said they had a 3 hour wait and they wouldn’t be able to xray today so off to a&e I went which was heaving but we were dealt with pretty swiftly. Xray and he’s broken both radius and ulna and one of the fractures is going into the growth plate. I won’t know the full extent until we see the fracture clinic in 24 hours however we were sent home in a plaster cast and sling and I’ve kept him comfortable with calpol alternating nurofen. My plan is to go into school tomorrow asking for the accident book copy but I want to see it and not have it done and back dated. I will tell them he won’t be in for the next couple of days until I know more but I’m not disclosing the damage he’s done until I know for definite.

I am furious. He very clearly to me had broken his arm the moment I seen him. She played it down to me on the phone and his arm had been manipulated and it should not have been. They did not contact me fast enough and no accident from was given. Does anyone have advice? I want to complain because I’m just so unhappy about the handling and I don’t want it to happen again but I want the first aid training to be looked into also. My poor boy.

Just because you’re upset about your child being injured doesn’t mean you get angry and start blaming people. The school did nothing wrong. I’d be very empathetic if she wasn’t massively overreacting

Secondly, trained first aiders should be able to recognize who needs further medical attention.

Indeed.

Trained first aiders are meant to be able to do a quick assessment and try to keep someone alive until they can get proper medical help. They are not trained to assess possible fractures or anything that needs a doctor to diagnose.

They clearly knew something was up and so they asked that you came and picked up earlier. They relinquished their responsibility to the parent and that's it. I have a friend with a child with severe allergies, the stories from school are scary.

The TA probably asked your son if he could move his arm. That’s a normal thing to ask because loads of young children are dramatic and think they’ve broken their arm when they haven’t. In this case, your son actually did break his arm. No one did anything wrong. You shouldn’t be angry at anyone.

What time was playtime (when he fell) and how long had he been like that before they called you? The answer to this would determine how angry I would be.
If they have an afternoon playtime and he'd been like that for a short amount of time then fine, they did the best they could.
If they don't (mine didn't) then he would have been in pain since lunch or the morning break and I would be fuming.

OP do you know what time it happened at? If it was that late PM playtime then I’m another who thinks you’re directing your anger at your poor son’s accident in the wrong place.
I broke my foot at school, freak accident I landed awkwardly on a bit of a loose brick. I hobbled over to the first aider who took off my shoe; I was screaming in agony, so she called my Mum. But at first it looked ‘normal’. It took about 30 mins for the swelling to kick in; if it hadn’t long happened perhaps it could be something like this? I wouldn’t just jump to the school acting negligently here without more facts; what time did it happen, what actually happened, etc.
I hope he recovers quickly!

I worked in schools for many years until recently, we were all properly Frist Aid trained and I was in charge of accidents and our school First Aid room as part of pastoral care.

You are right in that this was not handled correctly, however you would get best results by being calm and professional when you deal with this.

Accidents do happen and children - young and teenage - do get fractures and broken bones from falls or sports or whatever, so that in itself is rather unfortunate but not unexceptional.

The school should have rung the responsible parent as soon as possible....there might be a delay while they were assessing the damage and dealing with the immediate effects.

If the school does not have a trained doctor they are not allowed to "diagnose" as such, so they wouldn't be able to tell you definitely whether a breakage had happened. But anyone First Aid trained would be assessing the amount of distress/pain, how the child was holding themselves or their limb, and whether any limb was at an odd angle or whatever. It is acceptable to ask a child to wiggle their fingers to see if they are able to (if not it would indicate something quite serious) but not acceptable to 'manipulate an arm or joint' because of the possibility of a breakage. Make sure you know exactly what happened when you say "manipulation" before you make a complaint.

They should be making the child comfortable (sitting down, putting a pillow or cushion under the limb to provide support, child under observation somewhere in case they suddenly fainted) and contacting parents. It would be perfectly acceptable to say to a parent, "he's holding his arm oddly, he's complaining of severe pain, I'm worried in case of a breakage or fracture so we're recommending you get him checked out" - this is quite different from 'diagnosing' a breakage. The school would not expect to call an ambulance in this case as - nasty as a break is - it is not immediately life threatening, and the child can quite easily walk out to parent's car etc.

I would suggest going to the school for the full details, you can ask for a copy of the accident report and take it from there. If they have mishandled it, certainly make a complaint but do it calmly with the full facts at your fingertips first. You will also want to state the outcome you expect from your complaint which would, in this case, be that the school overhauls their First Aid practices and procedures.

To say you're "utterly distraught" over a child's playground accident is really over the top. Most children will encounter such things.

My daughter was in reception and was pulled to the floor, picked her up at home time and the school told me what happened, and she was in a bit of pain.

Took her to A&E and she had a fractured elbow, arm was put into a cast and a sling, had a bad nights sleep as she was in pain.

Was i angry at the school - no. It was an accident. They were not doctors so didnt realise how severe the accident was. I wasnt even called early to collect her.

But i still dont blame the school, they did their best to keep her comfortable and kept a close eye on her.

He had an accident. He was seen by first aid. They recognised that he needed further examination. Rather than spend time filling in an accident form they rang you immediately. Perfect procedure followed by the school.

Why not? What have they done inappropriately?

I agree! Of course they should have notified you that he was likely to need to be taken to hospital! All the more so as you also had your five year old to deal with and it might have made sense for you to call for some family support to take her while you got him squared away. Also accident reports need to be filled out for lots of incidents and this must have been fairly serious or he wouldn't have had such a serious break.

The child was fine. He had a broken arm which many children have every day. The OP wasn’t told not to take him to hospital.

And it’s great that you, from this post, can tell that the OP’s son clearly had fractures and the school really messed up. You clearly have fantastic retrospective X-ray vision. Especially given the thread is full of doctors (or medics, as you call them) missing fractures in their own children and of children who were so distressed teachers thought there’d be a fracture and there wasn’t.

Carrying on like a pork chop (aus phrase) from now on is set the tone for the child’s response to other injuries later on. A sensible parent would soothe him, make sure he’s comfortable, tell him he’s doing to be fine and move on. Not complain to the school governors 🙄

Another example as to why teachers are leaving the profession!

You should write a note to the school though op, perhaps along the lines of a ' thank you for looking after my son, which must have taken time away from your teaching and other children...' would be a different take. Or 'I appreciate you are not a trained doctor and you did your best as 'loco parentis''. Or 'thank you for prioritising my sons welfare rather than filling in the endless forms'...etc you ;pick.

And as a verified first aider (!) you’ll appreciate that some fractures take longer to become apparent. It’s not negligent not to appreciate it immediately, it’s just how some fractures present

I think you are reacting to this very emotionally, which is understandable.

But the crux of this is when he hurt himself and if there was a delay in calling you.

If there was, you have a reason to discuss it because in such cases the school should call parents sooner.

They are not medically trained - a 'first aider' - is just that- someone to 'hold the fort' while more help is sought, or prevent more damage. (Both my adult DCs are first aiders in the workplace and have had to deal with accidents.)

Your only cause for complaint is if your son hurt his arm hours before they contacted you. If that's the case, they need to reassess this.

My DD has twice broken her arm at school. Each time it was accidental. One time they told me at home time as it happened 20 minutes before and I wouldn’t have been able to get there any sooner but would have been anxious and possibly drove too fast had they called me. The other time was in the morning. They phoned me, told me it looked like she would need to go to hospital but that she was OK. I spoke to her on the phone.
Accidents happen.

I completely disagree with previous posters who say you are overreacting. I would also be very cross and upset.

I would want to know:

• If he injured himself ‘at playtime’, what time was this? Because schools don’t have playtime at 2.50, which is when they called you. If it was in fact at lunchtime, why the hell didn’t they call you earlier as he was clearly quite badly hurt?
• Why were you given no accident form stating what had happened and at what time?
• Why did they not inform you of the potential seriousness of his injury on the phone?

I’m usually the last one to complain but I would also be escalating this to the governors.

All this talk of ambulances is idealistic. My DS broke his arm horrifically in several places - it was z-shaped! - and the 999 call handler said they wouldn't send an ambulance, so I had to get an uber to A&E with him screaming all the way. The OP's child was ambulatory and not in anywhere near such a state so I think the school did the right thing getting OP to take care of it. I get that it's all distressing, I really do, but I don't see how being angry and them and looking at an accident book is the solution to anything. If it's a learning issue, just calmly call or email the head about how it was done and could be done better in future.

Did you not want to know why kids are so regularly breaking bones at school?

This. Yes it's awful and stressful but it's just one of those things in life. There is no point in getting angry. Schools are not hospitals and they did all they could. Getting this distraught isn't going to help your child..

The child was fine. He had a broken arm which many children have every day. The OP wasn’t told not to take him to hospital.

Wasn't told not to take him t o hospital

Wonderful double negative there!
Assume you mean she was advised to take him to hospital?

He wasn't fine.
He has an arm broken in 2 places.

I don’t believe it is acceptable procedure in any school to cancel filling out the form because they’ve spoken to parents. The form is there for a reason. That’s what demonstrates they’ve followed policy in caring the child as they are required to.

thank you for looking after my son, which must have taken time away from your teaching and other children

?????!

The kid had broken his bloody arm!

I agree with the first point.

Unless he's in Year R or Year 1 there'd be no playtime at 2.50pm

So there was either a delay from morning play or at lunchtime.