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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Extremely boy heavy class

63 replies

NotJustAnotherMum · 04/09/2024 16:46

My DD has just started reception in a small rural school. It’s split years so nursery/reception, Y1/Y2 etc. and I’ve realised that her class has 17 boys and only 3 girls (including my daughter). I’m worried my DD won’t get the variety of friendships and also concerned as the mum of one of the other little girls isn’t really forthcoming. I could just really do with someone else in my corner, as starting school is a big change all round. Has anyone got any experience of this and can tell me it’s going to be ok?

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Comedycook · 04/09/2024 17:49

PoshTosh · 04/09/2024 17:45

Good opportunity to develop some friendships with boys. My experience is that it’s a bit physical in the early years but the horrid bitchy years in upper primary will be less.

I found in both my DC's primary classes that in the later primary years, vast majority of boys become absolutely football mad. One of the girls in my dds class was football crazy too so she was fine but wasa bit different for the other girls and the only two boys who didn't care about football.

Holidayingwithfriends · 04/09/2024 17:49

DS' class was similar in KS1. None of the girls seemed to mind but all got along well. He is now in Year 3 and 4 more girls have joined so now there are 8. In our small school DC play with other year groups at play times so I'd imagine that helps.

Choochoo21 · 04/09/2024 17:51

There is literally nothing you can do about the amount of boys vs girls in the class.

I would try and join a club or 2 and make friends in other ways.
Rainbows/brownies would be a good idea.

I had loads of boy mates growing up (still do) and it never did me any harm.
I get on well with anyone.

I definitely wouldn’t move schools over it and at least give her a year to see how she gets on.

Original poster

NotJustAnotherMum · 04/09/2024 17:52

Andoutcomethewolves · 04/09/2024 17:22

Do you mean 17 boys and 3 girls in just your DD's year or in total across the two years (reception and year 1)?

I went to a village school and in my year there were eight boys and just one other girl! The other girl was really not my cup of tea, very girly and prone to drama, hated schoolwork etc whereas I was quite reserved and academic and also a bit of a tomboy. I didn't start until I was 7 (lived abroad before that) and by that age some of the little boys in my class were already making quite mean comments about how much prettier 'Lily' was than me (I mean it was true 😆, but still hurt!).

As the classes obviously went up one year at a time we'd spend one year with the year above then the next with the year below, and most of my close friends were from those years. Two girls from the year below became my 'best' friends who I'd hang out with at breaks even when we weren't in the same class and I was very good friends with a girl and a couple of the boys from the year above too. I also became good friends with a couple of the boys in my year although they did tend to gravitate towards the other boys at breaktimes etc.

Overall I'd say it worked out fine! Especially as you say your DD is sociable. It's a lot more normal for different ages to mix in schools like this and she'll find her place! Also there are a lot of advantages to rural/village schools (or at least there were in mine - I wouldn't change it for the world!).

The 17 boys and 3 girls is across nursery and reception as they are mixed. She’ll be with different kids when she goes up to Y1 as they are mixed with Y2. Like you say I’m sure she’ll find her place and the class sizes are small compared to other places meaning she’ll get more one on one time.

OP posts:

mynameiscalypso · 04/09/2024 17:53

I would have said that oh, that's fine, she can just play with the boys but DS was in Reception last year (in a fairly evenly split class) and it was bizarre how quickly it split down into the sexes. DS is/was incredibly unusual in that his best friend is a girl - they get on brilliantly but I think that's partly because neither had found their place within the traditional 'boy' and 'girl' groups up until then. So yes, in an ideal world, it wouldn't be an issue but I'd be worried too.

Princessyellow · 04/09/2024 17:56

We had our reception home visit today for my son- 17 boys and 8 girls, the other class is the same ratio. It’s been way more boys than girls for 3rd year in a row apparently, also a low birth rate year.

Alltheberries · 04/09/2024 18:21

My DD played with a little boy in her nursery class right up until the end of primary. It was only once she started secondry school that she made friends with girls and had nothing to do with the boys. It is not so much of an issue at primary level as it is when older. But of course it depends on the boys. As long as there is a variety of personalities.

Getonwitit · 04/09/2024 18:22

The School in Stromness only had boys start in P1 this year. The class is 18 boys and no girls.

RawBloomers · 04/09/2024 18:25

We changed schools for y2 and my twin DDs became the only girls in their year in a mixed y2/y3 class. There was a y3 girl as well, but she had a lot of issues and was not interested in being friends (and my DDs were not keen on her really, either). They made friends, including best friends (one of whom is still a BF, despite no longer being at the same school). More girls did join later on and there was definitely some gravitating towards them when they did! But my DDs maintained close friendships with lots of the boys too.

I don’t think it was ideal. But their previous school had had pretty even numbers and socially things were really split such that it was hard for a girl to do anything with a boy without there being pressure not to, and I think that was worse. One of my DDs got very into robotics and physics in the “unbalanced” class and I think that would have been more difficult for her at her previous school.

BananaGrapeMelon · 04/09/2024 18:25

My DS's class was 22 boys and 8 girls and that was absolutely fine all the way through primary. Your ratio is worse though.

imjusthereforAIBU · 04/09/2024 18:27

Our daughter was one of 6 girls in a class of 30 (24 boys, 6 girls).
Over time a few boys (and girls) left, and more girls have joined the class. It's now a smaller class of around 25 with 8 girls.

The girls in the class are one group of friends who switch up who they like to play with week on week and do play with the boys.. but mostly stay as a group of girls at this age now (ages 7-8).

A few of the boys mums have commented how it's lovely that the girls are such a tight knit group of friends and they feel a bit left out sometimes! The girls invite each other to their parties and arrange playdates. The boys spend a lot of time playing football together - and the boys who don't like football (there are 2 or 3 of the current 17 boys) will hang out with the girls to do whatever it is the girls do at playtime etc.

They all get on well and there is no real worry that the class in imbalanced.

In summary, in your position I wouldn't worry. As she gets older if you are worried she's not making friendships that benefit her, you could always enrol her in some out of school activities with other girls or her old playgroup friends.

Chillimuma · 04/09/2024 19:01

I was in a class of 19 boys and 6 girls for a couple of years. It was horrible.

Wouldhavebeenproficient · 04/09/2024 19:07

Definitely something to keep an eye on. And maybe go for some extra curriculars that are typically quite girl-heavy, like ballet. My little nephew was recently the only boy invited to a birthday party when all the girls from the class had been invited. He was quite embarrassed when he found out but we told him to take it as a compliment.

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