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Primary education

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Original poster

Bad feeling about supply teacher

119 replies

christmaslover88 · 08/12/2022 13:25

I want to start by saying I don't want to be "that parent" but I have some concerns. ds started reception in September. The school is fab and the teachers all seem really amazing. He's very happy there and always excited to go

Yesterday I dropped him off and his normal class teacher was there. However, when he got home he told me his normal teacher had to leave as her baby was poorly (absolutely no issue with this, kids get sick, it's really tough for working parents) and they had a supply teacher for the rest of the day. Ds talked about the teacher, he's 4 so no concept of what makes a good/bad teacher so it was all just general chat about the day. Not one thing he said sat right with me

DS was unwell over the weekend with a stomach bug. He last vomited Sunday afternoon so I kept him off Monday and Tuesday due to the 48h rule. Somehow the supply teacher knew he'd been off sick. She told him he was "still poorly" because he had a cough. It's fucking winter, everyone has a cough. I'm not keeping a perfectly healthy 4 year old off school because he coughed a couple of times
She told him off for coughing into his hand not his elbow because he "would spread germs". I've made a point during covid not to make ds paranoid about germs and teach hand washing and covering mouth when coughing without putting a negative spin on it. I saw far too many toddlers scared of germs due to lockdown and parents driving the point home too negatively
She didn't take her coat off the whole time she was there. I know it's cold but the school is really warm. This one might be petty but it just doesn't sit right with me
She sat them all down on the carpet to discuss "things we don't do at school". I appreciate this could have been prompted by poor behaviour, but the normal class teachers have never had to do this sit down chat
They spent the afternoon watching Hey Duggee. I'm not against tv in school (I know they watch numberblocks as part of their maths lessons) but it doesn't sound like this was linked to a lesson, just a way for the supply teacher to avoid teaching
They weren't allowed to play outside. Reception have their own outside area connected to their classroom and it is normally free flow in and out in the afternoon. They all have coats, waterproof trousers and wellies in school

Obviously I understand the class teacher had to leave suddenly and it's not easy to get a good supply teacher at short notice like this, but not one thing ds told me was (in my eyes) a positive. Would you mention it to the school or just let it go? To be clear, I wouldn't be complaining or anything, just sending an email saying this is what ds told me. The school may not know what she was like or how the day unfolded if no one else was around

Happy to be told it's not a big deal or to not get involved, it's my first term with a child at school and definitely don't want to be difficult but I just felt she wasn't up to the school's normal high standards

OP posts:

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Skinnermarink · 08/12/2022 13:30

The thing is, a four year old is not a totally reliable witness. You’ve only got what he’s told you to go on.

purpleme12 · 08/12/2022 13:31

You sound like you're looking for something to nit pick 🤣

Hey Duggee was probably not watched for the whole afternoon.

So what if they didn't have free flow for this afternoon. It's one day.

I really can't see anything to note about the other things. So what if she said he's poorly. You know he's not, it's not a big deal.

Oh dear

drpet49 · 08/12/2022 13:33

Right. And you believe all of this. What your 4 year old has told you.

The only one that is most likely true is her wearing her coat all day. I wouldn’t bat an eyelid at this.

Underscore21 · 08/12/2022 13:33

Don't send that email, the school staff will think you're deranged if you do.
Are you sure OP that your DS isn't ill? Irrelevant whether it's winter, unless it's an asthma or other chronic respiratory condition, a 'new cough' especially after D&v would set alarm bells ringing that it's all part of the same viral illness. I'm not surprised the teacher commented on that.
Taking off/ leaving on her coat all afternoon, is neither here or there so what?

BendingSpoons · 08/12/2022 13:35

My thoughts are:
Hey Duggee - could he have exaggerated this? Watching it all afternoon may have been 20 mins before the end of the day. Not amazing but fine for a one off.
Germs - realistically teachers will do things differently to you, but unless it's a big deal you have to let it go. I think the reference to germs is fairly normal.
Coat - that doesn't matter really but you acknowledge that. Reception classrooms with doors that open loads are often cold.
No outside play - again this isn't brilliant but there may be a reason. Maybe she was on her own and couldn't supervise both. Maybe she was cold so didn't bother of course!

I suspect this may have been someone who works in the school, as getting supply in the middle of the day is tough. I wouldn't complain about any of this. The outside play one I would maybe ask about if it happens lots, but it would be asking why, not complaining.

cecinestpasunepipe · 08/12/2022 13:36

KatherineofGaunt · 08/12/2022 13:39

She told him he was "still poorly"
Could she have been being sympathetic that he had a cough after being off? Rather than insinuating he should still be off school?

She told him off for coughing into his hand not his elbow because he "would spread germs"
It's true, though. Associate you don't want him to be overly worried about germs, but one comment from a teacher, probably followed by "let's wash your hands now" is fine.

She sat them all down on the carpet to discuss "things we don't do at school"
Supply teachers often do not immediately command the same levels of behaviour, so not unusual to lay out some rules.

They spent the afternoon watching Hey Duggee.
Has it been confirmed it was all afternoon? In any case, supply often follow plans left by the teacher or, in this case of a last-minute supply, given a few bits by the other year group teacher or SLT. Highly likely the TV was on for a bit while the teacher and TA sorted out other activities.

They weren't allowed to play outside.
One afternoon of not being outside is fine.

I have done supply and it can be tough. While I know not all teachers are good teachers, I don't feel any of these things warrant being against the supply teacher.

DNAshelicase · 08/12/2022 13:42

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Katapolts · 08/12/2022 13:44

All of this is ridiculously petty 😆

You're taking the word of a 4 year old as gospel!

She's right about the coughing, and you have absolutely no idea whether the class teacher has had to sit them down for a chat about behaviour before.

This was last minute, emergency cover. Watching Hey Duggee is fine.

BendingSpoons · 08/12/2022 13:46

Katherine above makes a good point. My year 2 child told me they didn't get to do a reward because they are not behaving well for the TA that does PPA cover. This might be why the supply teacher/TA sat them down for a chat.

She also told me the elf didn't visit because 3 children did something they shouldn't. I don't particularly agree with the elf being used in this way, or group punishment, but it's not a big deal.

Towcat15 · 08/12/2022 13:47

Sorry but not one of those things would bother me and certainly not as a one off with an emergency supply teacher for a class of 4 year olds.

Katapolts · 08/12/2022 13:48

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The school were lucky to find anyone to cover at the last minute.

What is the Head supposed to do with an email from a parent saying "my 4 year old reported to me that the supply teacher sat them down on the carpet" 😆😆

She had a pulse and a DBS check, the school were grateful to have her!

ChocolateBauble · 08/12/2022 13:48

If you send the email you will be forever thought of as ‘that parent’ 🤣, because quite frankly you are!

theseriousmoonlight · 08/12/2022 13:49

OP, if it sets your mind at ease, the class ta would been there so if there were any issues regarding the cover teacher, they would be passed on.

I would take what your ds says with a pinch of salt. You should have heard what my dd said about her nursery teacher to me (she forgot to do this, that, didn't know how to count to 10, watched TV all day etc) and, as I know the teacher, we've also laughed about what she told her about me!

Rainbowsandbutterflies1990 · 08/12/2022 13:49

I had a 4 year old tell their parent that my Ta was sleeping in the corner all day and the mum came up to talk to me about it the next day 🙄 so I think the fact all of this is just from the child is an issue

forrestgreen · 08/12/2022 13:50

Yep, you would be that parent

It was be very surprising if a school managed to get supply in during the day. More likely a TA or teacher from elsewhere in the school.

Bewitched005 · 08/12/2022 13:51

Goodness, you are nit picking here. What has the supply teacher done that's so awful?
She doesn't have to justify her every single movement to parents.

She sat the children on the carpet to discuss 'things we don't do at school.'

Why doesn't that 'sit right with you?' What is your specific objection?

Somehow the supply teacher knew he'd been off sick.

Er- maybe someone told her? Why are you having a problem with that?

Perhaps if you were expected to teach a class of hitherto unknown 4 year olds, you might be just a bit more empathetic.

Miriam101 · 08/12/2022 13:51

She didn't take her coat off all day? Report her to the governors! Off with her head! Lol.

I'm sorry OP but YAB massively U with this one, and the others are all things which, frankly, a 4yo could be being deeply unreliable in relating and which wouldn't be that big a deal if they were true (apart from the watching Hey Duggee all afternoon but I suspect the reality is they watched a couple of episodes for 15 minutes.)

This is your first term of your child's loooong seven years at primary school. During those seven years there will probably be proper problems and conundrums to address. The school will be far more likely to take you seriously then if you don't make a tit of yourself over these non-issues now.

QueenAstrid · 08/12/2022 13:52

I opened this thread expecting it to be something sinister about safeguarding. OP I can’t believe you started a thread about this let alone that you are considering contacting the school. There is nothing at all there that would give me cause for concern. Why on earth would you care that she kept her coat on?

INACGMOOH · 08/12/2022 13:53

I think you really should contact the school. It's been a long term and they could do with a laugh.

SpamIAm · 08/12/2022 13:53

I hate to make assumptions but...PFB?

Rainbowsandbutterflies1990 · 08/12/2022 13:55

Also a supply teacher sitting them on carpet to talk about class behaviour is actually something that should be praised , she is clearly explaining her expectations of the children, which is a good thing. As she may not know them being supply.

Jules912 · 08/12/2022 13:56

In my DC's school a reception class would be taught by the TA in this situation, and an older class by whoever they could find ( usually a TA but DS had the deputy head once as no one else was available)

tattychicken · 08/12/2022 13:57

Coat wearing bitch...

Original poster

christmaslover88 · 08/12/2022 13:59

Thanks for all the responses. I do believe my 4 year old because I know when he's exaggerating/lying/confused. I don't take "everything he says as gospel" but I do believe these things

Sorry, I didn't mean to imply hey duggee was on all afternoon but realise that wasn't clear in my op. All I know is they watched it for a period of time, I worded that badly

Honestly, some of you are truly unpleasant people. There was nothing in my op that required you to call me a "fucking nutter" or anything similar. I said I was more than happy to be told to let it go and I am, so why the nasty and personal comments?! Honestly, I hope some of you aren't parents, your poor kids growing up with this example! Genuinely grateful to the posters who managed to reply without being bitchy

As I said, each individual thing isn't necessarily an issue on its own, but nothing he said about the teacher implied she'd done a good job and all the things together gave a really poor impression

OP posts:

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