So disappointed in school- how to approach head

[Willow33]

DD in year 4 is above average ability (as is over half the class) in our local state school.
There are lots of confident, extrovert children who are happy to take centre stage and get picked for things. Even the children who have behaved poorly but have a good subsequent week get star of the week etc
However DD age 9, who is quiet, well behaved and does all her work well, gets no recognition. This has happened every year she has been there, except in year 2 when her teacher did.

Dd has asked me why did those boys who hit and bullied another boy in the class get rewarded but she doesn't.

If I go and say something to her teacher, an NQT, it will be like her getting a reward as tokenism. That's what happened in Reception.

I feel so disappointed in the school; it gets by academically as most parents will get their children tutors from year 4 to do the 11+ exam.

I don't know how to approach the school as it feels they- head and deputy- don't listen.
Homework is not marked, Fridays there is no school work. Their class teacher often keeps the whole class in to miss a lot of their break when it is due to a few noisy boys. It is over 2/3 boys in the class.

If I could move dd, I would but we can't afford private and other schools are full nearby. DD likes the school and has friends so is happy in that sense but obviously i can see how there are gaps.

A lot of the other parents are my friends and so I know they aren't happy and have gone to see the head about the class teacher. The head just gets very defensive.

Would appreciate advice

Approach a governor. The head won't be able to ignore it or sweep it under the carpet.

Agreed. I know a kid in DCS class who has gotten star of the week seven times yet is very naughty, yet my dc is really well behaved and works really hard and gets nothing!

You need to take this to the governors

you can't take it straight to the governors - there will be a complaints policy which will involve talking to the Head first.

If you're concerned about her not getting star of the week i'd approach the class teacher and then the Head - this is something all schools should be aware of? It's always the quieter ones who get missed.

If you are unhappy about the standard of education then you need to meet the Head and outline exactly what you aren't happy with. Homework not being marked is not ideal but not exceptional IME - definitely worth understanding the school policy? No school work on a Friday - what are they doing then? Music/Sport/Art are all part of the curriculum - or are they going totally free range?

I don't think any schools prepare for the 11+ so the fact that most people use tutors isn't grounds for a complaint in itself.

Op

your issue is about your child not being rewarded

wherqs on the basis of what you have posted, my issue would be with the fact my child is at a thoroughly shit school and I would be urgently looking for an alternative

My dd is 40 and her school experience was like this. Rewards are used to encourage good behaviour. If you're already 'good', you don't need to improve and so don't get a reward. It stinks.

I appreciate your responses.
I would love for her to leave but the other local state schools are oversubscribed and full. I just would like the school to acknowledge her, reward her. However, they don't 'hear' us parents. For example, their teacher was giving chocolate and haribo sweet rewards if a table did good English work. A few of us parents said we would prefer she didn't give food rewards but she carried on! The head told us that she told her she "would prefer she didn't give sweets as rewards" but that was it.

The point about tutors isn't a complaint. It highlights that the teaching isn't adequate itself. We have a tutor and she is shocked by the things that my daughter hasn't been taught in school.

The school is in a very middle class area.
Last week , a TA broke my friend's dd's swimming goggles while putting them on and then blamed the child and would not apologise. The mum called up the school and they denied it completely and said the child was making it very difficult. I know this child and she is one of the most sensible children you would meet.

I am not sure I can say anything about the academic side because I can't sit through every lesson and know what is being taught.

I am not the only parent who has complained in the past - a lot do more vociferously than I do.
How do I take it to the governors or what is the next step with the head?

Pick your battles. The whole class punishment is the big one.

homework not being marked isn’t really an issue. Parents like it marked, Ofsted might like it marked if the policy says it has to be but other than that it won’t make much difference. Fridays might be an issue depending on what you mean by doing no school work. If they are wandering around feral and doing nothing all day then it’s not good. If they are providing a broad and balanced curriculum and doing worthwhile activities, just not academic ones, on that day then I’d see that as a positive not a negative.

Op

can you afford a private to tutor once or twice a week?

Homework not being marked is a huge issue

Children have sweet fa to put effort in if they know they’re never going to bet any feedback on it and likely to just be binned

Homework not being marked is only an issue if homework is supposed to be marked as per the homework policy. Some schools have a policy of not marking homework, or indeed some work done in class. The teachers still look at the books, spot trends and cover those things in more depth, address specific issues with specific children, but they don't mark everything. You'll have to check the homework policy.

You need to decide what to complain about, and what to let go.

The giving sweets and the broken goggles really? I couldn't get worked up about it. Star of the week goes to the noisy boys - I get why a child might be annoyed by that, but even young children soon work out that it really is a meaningless award designed to try to encourage less well behaved children.

You say that the class are making good progress, despite apparently having every Friday off. You give no credit to the school for that, but put it down to the good catchment area. Your child is happy and has lots of friends.

I feel a bit sorry for the school to be honest - lots of parents going to the headteacher to complain about the class teacher, but I'm not really clear what they are complaining about.

All in all it sounds like there is lots to be happy with and little to complain about.

I’m a school governor. Rather than go in with examples relating to your DD specifically, you could ask to chat about how they foster good behavior in the school and incentivise good work. You could also ask how they approach poor behaviour and similarly provide support to children who are struggling.

Reward should never ever be given for ‘not hitting’ etc, that won’t work, or solve the problem and is likely to cause resentment in others. On the other hand it can be hard finding a way to individually reward 32 children in a class for being quietly conscientious.

My son does well at school and has got certificates that have spent the whole year in his locker unseen. He finds being singled out excruciatingly awful and hates reward presentation. Schools can find it very difficult to find a balance!

You are conflating lots of different issues.

1. Dd not getting star of the week. Speak to the teacher. Other kids being deserving or not is not your call or your dd. The teacher has more knowledge of these kids than you or your dd.

1. Class being kept in. How long? How often? A couple of mins if the class are not ready is not an issue. Longer than this could be. Speak to the teacher but be aware your dd may be exaggerating.

1. Not doing anything on Fridays. Speak to the head but be sure of your facts. It is highly unlikely that no work is done on Fridays. It could however be that they do art or PE or something else that is not perceived as work.

1. Other parents. Gossiping and moaning between the parents is unhelpful and just feeds discontent.

Finally your dd is happy and seemingly doing well academically so what is the real issue?

It isn't the Governors job to deal with these issues.

Have a conversation with the Head.

It sucks but you just have to teach your dd to be internally motivated rather than needing recognition from her teachers. The positive behaviours she is shoeing will benefit her in years to come when "Star of the Week" is a distant memory. And there's nothing to stop you praising her.

The governors will not look into the issues you have outlined here. If you want to complain then you need to speak to the head. However, again you sound like you are just moaning.
Sweets - You may prefer for your child to not be given sweets. It is fin for you to say this, but you don't speak for everyone. The odd sweet is hardly the end of the world and making a big fuss will mark you out as being a moaner.
Goggles - You were not there. It is nothing to do with you. It isn't even related to your dd. It really is a non - issue. The other news flash is that sweet, sensible kids tell fibs too.

Your best option is to move your dd elsewhere. It may be inconvenient or you may have to pay, but you clearly will not be happy there. Even if they fixed star of the week, you would have something else and then something else to complain about. You sound like hard work.

I mean I have had parents say that about my son
but what they don't k is (bc it's not their business) is that he's autistic not naughty and struggles every single day, i think he'd prefer to trade star of the week for an easier time at school if he could chose.

There are a number of issues Here, all pointing to the fact that the teacher is very inexperienced. Is there a policy on rewards? I doubt very much giving out sweets is part of it. It's generally frowned upon because of the rates of obesity and dental decay. Same goes for sanctions, doubt very much that keeping in a whole class is part of it.

Some very good points here.
There is no h.w policy. A lot of the time no h.w is set. It is odd when the teacher yells at them to do the h.w that she does occasionally set, but does not ever return it to them marked or discuss it with them.
She is very young and is still yelling at them a lot and it is the end of the school year- I think she hasn't 'got' them. There are definitely great teachers in the school but this one isn't one of them (yet).
The class is kept in every week - at least once. It will be all of them and they will miss most of their break due to the infractions of a few.
Yes, I need to pick my battles. I will speak to the head and try and see if I can get DH to come as he is very calm. But, yes, I have today encouraged dd on her completing the work her tutor set her. @Porcupineintherough Intrinsic motivation is the key factor here. I am looking for ways to do that. DD likes physical awards!

How do you know the teacher “tells” at them

op - this school sounds like a rotten apple - from the head, right through to the teaching and discipline approach.

i would be applying for other schools. I know you say full but there is always movement as people move location or to private. I would also get a private tutor in place once a week.

Yells

I'd be tempted to stop doing the homework if it's not being marked

I don't read this as being a bad school at all. The OP has said her daughter is happy with a lot of friends and that the children are doing well academically - though admittedly the school is given no credit for that. All down to a good catchment area and tutoring apparently. I find it hard to understand how the school can not be contributing to any of that given how many hours per week the children spend there.

The teacher is newly qualified and will be finding her feet in the profession. I would not like to be in her shoes. Parents sharing tales of their disatisfaction with her at the school gates, and going to the head to complain about what seem to be very minor events. She can't win can she? On the one hand she does not give out star of the week award fairly, yet on the other parents go in to complain about her trying to reward with sweets (which she probably paid for out of her own pocket). It's not the OP who needs to be looking for a new school, it's the teacher. Who wants to face that every working day?

I still find it hard to believe that there is no teaching and learning going on every single Friday. From the comments about the 11 plus I am assuming that this is a school with a lot of parents really pushing on 'academic' studies. Again, I am making assumptions here, but I find it more likely that Friday is the day when they cover more of the humanities/ creative arts/ PE type subjects? This seems more likely than a school not teaching for 20% of the week.

Firstly stop gossiping amongst yourselves - none of you are actually sitting in that classroom. Work out logically (take away the emotion and presumptions) what you want to ask. Don’t go in aggressively, you want people to respond to you.