best private school for 4 years old

[mellysmummy]

Hi all,
Me and my husband looking for a private school for our 3 years old daughter. We live in Cutty Sark near Lewisham in South East London. She is so sensitive and shy child, English is her third language currently. We are looking for a private school that improves her confident. We searched majority of local private preps and schools only but your personal advice and experiences will help us to decide. Meanwhile we moved to England recently so we do not have too much friends or family to discuss it - so it is more difficult for us to decide. We want to go for private as I mentioned my daughter is so shy I do believe she will flourish in small group more and also I would like her to stay at school until 16:30- 17:00 at least 2-3 days in a week. So its needs to be somewhere that she can get instruments, dance and/or language lessons after school time. The system is also not so familiar to us... For example preps are up to year 6 after that the students needs to get in to the 11+ exams. I would like the know... competitions for the private schools in this area? One of my husbands friends told us that secondary schools only offer place to 5-10% applicants. Is the competition like that in this area as well? If it its sounds risky. But if she can easily can get a place in one of the private secondary schools after preps it is ok... we do prefer small, warm and friendly school for her. I know my daughter is still 3 years old and too early to think about the secondary or 11+ right now but as I do not the system, I don't want to make wrong decision and then change her school later on.
Thank you.

You could try Blackheath High School, they accept girls from 3+ and its an all through school till 18. There would be an expectation you stay at the school till A Levels (and its a great school).

Your other options are in the same area Blackheath - Blackheath Prep and Pointer School are two preps that feed into variety of good schools , the benefit of these prep schools is they will prepare your daughter for a variety of schools, including grammar schools which are certainly a consideration for senior school.

@newsibling123 hi, what about the Greenwich Steiner School or Heath House.

Steiner is a very specific type of school, read up very carefully because you as a family have to be very committed. If she's still 3 in September l, a nursery for the first year is a good option too, you can then take time to choose a school

@gogohm oh didnt know that, thanks.

@newsibling123 @gogohm what about Colfe’s Juniors, another all through private school. Looks like it has great facilities but recent ISI report is a “GOOD” in each sections, it is not “EXCELLENT”.

Personally if my daughter was very shy and sensitive I'd probably look for a small nursery before thinking about all through schools or preschools of preps and primary schools.

Some preschools of preps and through schools will have your 3 year olds in uniform , whereas a small nursery will have a more home school feel.

All nurseries in the UK are 'private' and vary in sizes, so it may be best to look around your local and find one that is small and home like.

Then take your time and tour the local schools, do some research, follow your heart, research the local state primaries as there are some brilliant state primaries in London, with many languages spoken within the school, you can then tutor for private at 11 if you feel there are no state secondaries that match your daughter.

If you prefer private from the start, then I would still suggest Nursery and look to place her in a nearby prep or through school at 4+

All nurseries in the UK are 'private'

No, that’s not right, I don’t think, unless you mean something different to me. My DC went to state nurseries, as did the majority of children I know. I’m in London but not the right area. But I agree a nursery is best for a three-year-old.

OP the website www.locrating.com has a great map you can use to discover which schools are near you.

Then it is a process of looking st the school websites, searching their names in the mumsnet archives (eg just google something like “caterham school mumsnet”), and visiting thenones you feel attracted to.

I’m not in your area to help I’m afraid, unless you’re planning to move out of London.

I know the area. In my opinion Blackheath Prep or BHS better choice. Pointers so cold and formal, Heath House small and family business. But I wouldnt send my child there. I didnt like Colfe’s Juniors ISI report either. Buuuuut I know children who goes to Blackheath High School and Colfe’s - They are all happy. If you prefer coed you may also consider St Dunstands College?

Thanks for the responses. I will think about the nursery. What about the competition generally in 11+ exams? Approximately if you can describe it with a percentage how many applicants gets a place in independent secondary school. When I searched online its says competitonnis so high in London.

Of course its depends on the school but in general?

It depends on the school. There are mixed ability independent secondary schools that take almost all applicants. If you are realistic when applying you shouldn’t have a problem finding a place assuming your child doesn’t have substantial additional needs that schools may find difficult to accommodate.

The competition is for the most academically selective schools to which only the brightest children are selected. That’s the focus of all the angst and reporting around how hard the 11+ is.

@SundayTeatime

All nurseries in the UK are 'private'

No, that’s not right, I don’t think, unless you mean something different to me. My DC went to state nurseries, as did the majority of children I know. I’m in London but not the right area. But I agree a nursery is best for a three-year-old.

State funded nurseries are very thin on the ground in my part of London and have long waiting lists. The vast majority of nurseries are private.

What I meant to the OP was, even in the state funded nurseries, you 'pay' in the sense most parents are entitled 15 hours free nursery education for eligible 2 year olds and all 3 & 4 year olds. Additional 15 hours is available for the children of working parents subject to eligibility. If you're not eligible (and the OP probably isn't) you pay.

Plus of course the OP would like her DD to stay till 5pm some days, all that will be charged, same with lunch , and dropping off early for breakfast.

Its important OP knows at nursery no real difference between 'private' and 'state'.

@LondonGirl83 it is good then because I do prefer mixed ability independent school for my daughter specially in primary and seconday. They need to have fun while they are learning. I do believe little ones shouldnt have to much pressure, competition or stress. I do not want too academic, selective school for my daughter... Just warm, friendly and somewhere that teaching quality is excelent.

I wouldn’t rule out state, especially for primary. John Ball is, or was excellent when my dd’s were there, for example.

The other thing to bear in mind is often state schools in London are extremely diverse. We had one child who arrived in reception with no english at all, but there were several kids and parents from the same background who were able to translate and support the family until they settled.

There are many private schools in that area, depending on how far you want to travel. St Dunstans, Sydenham high, dulwich, out to croyden. I’d go visit them all and get a feel for the demographic.

Go for Blackheath High and you don’t need to worry about 11+ exams. I would try and avoid the 11+ in the area if I were you.

@TypsTrycks will think about the Blackheath High School. In my country we do not have only girls school so dont really know the advantages and disadvantages of it but I will go and visit the school. I was told that Balckheath High School have only 3 groups of year 7 and majority of girls moves to senior from juniors school so I dont think they have too much space for the students who apply from other schools. So I think you are right. Its looks like competition is high and risky in this area.

I know my daughter is still 3 years old and too early to think about the secondary or 11+ right now but as I do not the system, I don't want to make wrong decision and then change her school later on.

OP, please don't worry too much about this. You've got a very tiny daughter at the moment so secondary is quite far off. Many, many children change schools, especially in London, so worrying about the 'wrong' decision isn't helpful.

Previous advice about finding a lovely nurturing nursery sounds right to me. Good luck

@BlueBlueCowWondering thank you☺️🌸

slightly confused as you say you live in Cutty Sark near Lewisham? Cutty Sark is the middle of Greenwich no?

So your nearby primary schools are St Alfeges and John Wolfe.

All the independent schools are quite a distance from you, with most being in Blackheath Village.

If she's already 3 then you might be close to some registration deadlines if you want her to start in September - best to go and look round and get her name down ASAP?

in my experience, all kids at the prep schools who want to stay in the independent sector after 11+ do. But they might not end up at their first choice. There are some schools that are not selective/less selective at 11+.

As someone whose kids went through the 11+ process, I would say it's a total waste of a year. Year 6 becomes solely about exams and interviews. But then that's balanced against choosing a school at age 4 which will suit your dd when she's 18 - that's a big ask?

@ChnandlerBong

slightly confused as you say you live in Cutty Sark near Lewisham? Cutty Sark is the middle of Greenwich no?

So your nearby primary schools are St Alfeges and John Wolfe.

All the independent schools are quite a distance from you, with most being in Blackheath Village.

If she's already 3 then you might be close to some registration deadlines if you want her to start in September - best to go and look round and get her name down ASAP?

in my experience, all kids at the prep schools who want to stay in the independent sector after 11+ do. But they might not end up at their first choice. There are some schools that are not selective/less selective at 11+.

As someone whose kids went through the 11+ process, I would say it's a total waste of a year. Year 6 becomes solely about exams and interviews. But then that's balanced against choosing a school at age 4 which will suit your dd when she's 18 - that's a big ask?

@ChnandlerBong

OP has only just migrated to the UK, I know people from the shire counties that get confused with placing localities in London, for goodness sake!

Also DD is not native speaker so thrusting her into 4+assessments is hardly wise is it? Hence consensus a local nursery may be best for now.

Most of the local schools are do-able for Reception entry.

I'm not local to your area, so feel free to ignore. I really think the best thing you can do is go to visit the schools. Ofsted reports are not useful documents beyond a very cursory glance. The school with "good" could easily be a better school than one with an "outstanding" rating. Go to the schools and try to meet local parents.

@newsibling123 But surely she knows if she lives in central Greenwich? Cutty Sark is a long way from Lewisham- was just making sure I understood. Fir goodness sake indeed….

To be honest a lot of the local assessments (with the notable exception of Blackheath Prep) are fairly low key and the Colfes/Pointers/Blackheath High aren’t really selective. So if OP is after a nurturing start, they might be a good choice.

If not then I did also mention a couple of Greenwich primary schools which gave nurseries and which she should be in catchment for.

Which local nurseries were you thinking of?

[quote ChnandlerBong]@newsibling123 But surely she knows if she lives in central Greenwich? Cutty Sark is a long way from Lewisham- was just making sure I understood. Fir goodness sake indeed….

To be honest a lot of the local assessments (with the notable exception of Blackheath Prep) are fairly low key and the Colfes/Pointers/Blackheath High aren’t really selective. So if OP is after a nurturing start, they might be a good choice.

If not then I did also mention a couple of Greenwich primary schools which gave nurseries and which she should be in catchment for.

Which local nurseries were you thinking of?[/quote]
sorry @ChnandlerBong

I was on another thread and feeling confrontational (apologies!)

I used to have friends living close in Blackheath, but they just had childminder then primary at reception.

OP said " so sensitive and shy child, English is her third language currently. " So I thought small nursery would suit, sorry can't personally recommend any.