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Has your child ever done a piece of writing which made you think that the teacher will be very bemused what life in your family is like?

44 replies

emkana · 18/12/2007 20:58

dd2 (4 and in reception) wrote:

I'm scared when daddy hangs me over the bannister.

This is a game that they have, he doesn't really hang her over the bannister, just pretends to... but I wonder what the teacher made of it...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
emkana · 18/12/2007 20:59

In actual fact btw, dd wrote

I a s w d m o b

(initial sounds)

but helpfully there was the teacher writing what she meant next to it.

OP posts:
wethreekingsofORINOCOare · 18/12/2007 21:00

Oh yes.

A piece of work about what their parents jobs are.

"Daddy works away from home a lot, and Mummy talks to men on the phone in the evenings"
I was a mortgage advisor, arranging appointments, honest!

wethreekingsofORINOCOare · 18/12/2007 21:01

(my dd used to do that too, write with initial letter sounds, I'd forgotten that!)

popsycal · 18/12/2007 21:02

My sister, in the early 1980s when sporting a stylish 'page boy' cut, wrote about how her mum makes her sit down every morning before school and burns her ears.....

(she failed to add that when she gets her page boy 'tonged' she couldn't sit still)

Tamum · 18/12/2007 21:03

emkana

I wrote in my newsbook that my daddy (then the headmaster of the school) always liked to have a little dose when he got home from school. I meant doze, but I guess it raised a few eyebrows!

unknownrebelbang · 18/12/2007 21:06

Friend's daughter (now grownup) once wrote that her mother was in prison.

(Mum worked in prison, lol).

claricebeansmumhasnomincepies · 18/12/2007 21:06

DD wrote

"My Daddy goes to work and has lunch. Sometimes he has to have dinner as well".

Although he's a PR he does do other things rather than lunch and dinner!

RosaLuxMundi · 18/12/2007 21:08

DD3 wrote recently. 'his is a picture of my Daddy. He likes to wear ladies clothes.'

Wallace · 18/12/2007 21:22

PMSL

In P1 my ds1 wrote in his news book that "we went swimming and my sister drowned in the deep-end and the lifeguard had to drain the pool"

The "we went swimming" bit was true!

Wallace · 18/12/2007 21:25

does he Rosa?

suwoo · 18/12/2007 21:27

My DD when in nursery and writing/spelling phonetically, drew a lovely picture of her older cousin Charlotte. She had a great attempt at writing Charlotte's name above her picture and went in to school with a picture to present to the teacher entitled 'slut'.
Think about it.....CHARLOTTE, you can see where a 3 year old was coming from with slut

myrrhthamoo · 18/12/2007 21:31

Ds1 wrote " we live in a terrorist house."

dingdong05 · 18/12/2007 21:36

pmsl suwoo
that's going to keep me going for a while...
helped by the "mortgage advisor"
lol

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 18/12/2007 21:41

DD wrote 'my mum likes sleep, I like to watch television'

Sidge · 18/12/2007 21:49

DD1 last year wrote a story about "someone I know that has been in hospital".

She wrote a page about her daddy's operation that cut his willy and stopped him having babies...

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 18/12/2007 23:26

hahahaha

Katymac · 18/12/2007 23:31

"Daddy goes out at night with lots of women"

He is a dance teacher & does private lessons

Krimble · 18/12/2007 23:48

Ds wrote "last night we went to china and had sweet and sour"

Mostly he writes about watching DVDs so it sounds like that is all we do.

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 18/12/2007 23:53

Great post krimble

RosaLuxMundi · 18/12/2007 23:53

No, may I make absolutely clear that he does NOT.

hertsnessex · 19/12/2007 00:40

i had a spell a few weeks ago feeling v ill and drained etc and TWICE dozed on sofa for 10mins after lunch -now if ds1 answers the phone - he says "no shes asleep" then laughs - hes only 4!

he also told my dh tonight mummy does nothing all day - she sits!

apart from sorting things out on line - part of my job (ouside of home!), getting boys ready, out to park, lunch, tidy up, washing ironing, cooking dinner, out to my sisters, home, bath - u know the sort of thing! then yes, apart fromt hat i done nothing!!!!

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 19/12/2007 00:43

Yes, daddy asked DS what mummy does all day, apparently I sleep and go on pooter.

Granny22 · 19/12/2007 00:54

My DD aged 6 wrote that 'we do not go away at weekends because my Daddy has to do bank jobs. But he gets paid lots and buys us something nice'. This startling story was illustrated with a picture of a bearded man, wearing a stipped jumber, attacking a building labelled BANK with a giant hammer.

When this was pointed out to us at parents day we were able to explain that her bearded Dad had been installing cash line machines which had to be done when the bank was closed for the weekend.

AwayInAMunker · 19/12/2007 01:15

My sister once wrote "On holiday, we went to the pub, to graveyards and stayed in a hovel".

She was right. We had pub lunches. We went to graveyards in order for my mum to trace ancestors (genealogy) and the hovel was the family pet name for the charming(!) holiday cottage we found ourselves in. LOL at what the teacher would've imagined though!

ROFL at "slut" for Charlotte!

lojomamma · 19/12/2007 01:33

Suwoo, Charlotte turning into Slut made me
laugh, then I coughed, then I coughed harder and then I sneezed and coughed at the same time ... then I fainted. So I have to say yours wins.

But, ... I now have a sore arm and head.

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