DC on free school meals being singled out

[nothingcomestonothing]

I wasn't sure where to put this. My DCs small, single form entry Primary has been on the very catious side of things re covid (in my opinion). Last week we got an email with arrangements for September, including lunch arrangements, which are stated to be changing due to the need to socially distance in the kitchens.

All of KS1 will get FSM, as all are entitled. The DC in KS2 who are entitled because of low income will get FSM, and the rest of KS2 have to bring packed lunch. The KS2 DC who get FSM will be asked their meal choices at registration each morning.

Now it seems obvious to me that the KS2 who get FSM will be stigmatised by this plan - it will be obvious to the whole class that that their family have a low income, and will lead to teasing or worse. I think the DC this applies to will then decline the FSM so as not to be stigmatised, or their parents will, and potentially some v vulnerable DC will miss out on possibly their only good meal of the day In my view, whatever the system is, it shouldn't publicise DCs vulnerabilities like this.

Is anyone else's school doing this? I emailed the head with my concerns, got no reply. For context, DDs secondary school are offering hot meals for nearly 2000 DC from roughly the same size kitchen as the Primary school has which apparently can't make 250 or so hot meals safely. Is there some guidance or practice from other schools which I can highlight to DC's school on how to be super cautious without doing it like this?

I completely agree with you OP.

True, in most circumstances the children won't notice/care, and some good ideas given on here. That's not the point though - it's a confidentiality issue. If the school are careless with FSM info, how carefully do they respect even more sensitive info? How well do they follow other expectations?

Yes it's really annoying for HTs to get these emails, but addressing concerns is part of the job.

I live in an area where the majority get fsm, so no it probably wouldn’t be a problem here. But I can imagine in other areas it would. Think how many benefits bashing threads you see on here; those people have children, who will be hearing those views at home. It’s not a big leap from bashing those on benefits to those who get free dinners, and as OP says, there will be parents feeling shame, who may not want the whole class knowing their business, whose kids won’t get the hot meal they’re entitled to.

Michelle the difference between being 'unemployed' and simply not working (in a paid job) is apparently how it would be recorded on records like the census or legal forms. 'Unemployed' means not working but looking for work. Could be receiving Job Seeking benefits or living off a redundancy payment or not claiming anything but actively seeking work.
'Not working' is simply not working in a paid job but not in anyway wanting to be in a paid job. So no claiming Job Seekers Benefits or other benefits but simply 'Not In Paid Employment'.
I am a sahm/housewife. I don't have paid employment and I don't want or need too. But I can't tick 'unemployed' on forms because it messes up government stats about the country's level of unemployment.

Have things not changed on this in recent times though? A lot of the posters here are comparing back to their own childhoods. The system is different now and all children start out with all of them having fsm and the odd one that prefers to bring a packed lunch, then over time more and more children switch over to packed lunches over the years once no longer free. The example here the class is probably a mixed bag normally of some having school meals and some having packed lunches and they are used to the orders being done with the register, some of the school meals being funded and others paid by parents. Surely here it’s just a case of some kids that normally have parents that pay for school meals sending packed lunch instead, those parents would have to tell them specifically why for them to even realise that having a school meal isn’t an option at the mo for them

It was dinner tickets when i was a kid and you used to queue at the office for 5 on a monday morning break. My mum went without her lunch so we didnt have to go through it and made us packed sandwiches.
When my kids were entitled post divorce i didnt tell the school i was eligible but they automatically applied which humiliated me.
There is a total stigma against FSM. However the criteria are so broad now half the school are probably entitled.

@Pixxie7

Perhaps they should continue to provide vouchers to children affected so they can choose to bring packed lunches in, the same way as other children.

Brilliant idea

At my DGC's school all the DC are getting a hot 'grab bag'

Hit post too soon, all kids getting a grab bag fsm or paying or bringing a packed lunch. I can't see why all schools can't at least provide that.

Not all schools have kitchens

Hettythehoover, hope you feel better with that post. Hope you are not a teacher as you clearly have zero empathy. And, the head being on annual leave is neither here nor there. And the school could be in Scotland or Northern Ireland in which case he or she would be at work.

Bluebellsgreenbells, i have reread my post because i was annoyed at the inference that i might be 'victim blaming'. That could not be further from the truth. I thought you have misinterpreted what i said but on rereading i can see i had a poor choice of words. For 'tease' i really should have said 'bully'. In fact, i don't really know why i didn't because i do think those things i mentioned are bullying and in no way trivial or in any shape or form the fault of the victim. I am annoyed with myself that i didn't phrase that better.

OP I think you are doing the right thing. Kids should not be singled out and life is probably tougher for these kids already.
I had fsm and was never bullied (and there was a lot of bullying in those days) the other kids didn't care, but I cared. I went without lunch for the whole of my second year at high school as I was humiliated by it. I think it may have even stunted my growth as a result so it can have far reaching consequences.

Kids really don't give a toss about FSM these days. Things have moved on, as a previous poster said. There is other stuff they care more about. What was a big deal to kids 20 years ago or whatever really doesn't bother them any more so with all due respect, people's experiences when they were at school doesn't really apply.

Having said that, announcing it over the tannoy at a sports day really isn't on.

@BluebellsGreenbells

But some kids still do tease about clothing, ridiculous things like hair colour, anything that makes someone 'different' or a minority

No kids bully because they can. It’s not about the victim. It’s about power.

Please don’t blame the victim.

Didnt see anything suggesting blame Fact is bullying is rife. It is wise to help your kid fly under the radar and not be different. Telling the teacher makes things worse. I see parents near me encouraging 'individuality' in their late primary kids. I think God help that kid at secondary. They'll be crucified. Bullying is awful but exists everywhere. Focusing on not becoming a victim is a good survival skill for life and work.

Perhaps they should continue to provide vouchers to children affected so they can choose to bring packed lunches in, the same way as other children

And if they still don't turn up with a lunch? Then what?...

Inclusion and acceptance are core principles of school culture now.

Tell that to the parents of children with SN who regularly get left out of things...

From a slightly different perspective: as a governor I was not allowed to know the names of children for whom the school received Pupil Premium. These are the fsm children. Therefore I cannot see how it is acceptable for the whole school community to know who these children are. When we looked at progress stats, all the children were completely anonymous. FSM children have other school based “labels” attached to them and their names should remain confidential. It is not acceptable for them to be named/made obvious by any action by staff in your school or any school.

Therefore please insist on a reply but also remind the school that these children receive PP funding and they, and their parents/carers, should be respected regarding confidentiality. It’s very Very important.

It's been really interesting to read such different views, thanks all. Olay that is an excellent point re confidentiality, I think that was partly what I was trying to say but in a much messier way. I think I'll give the head until Tuesday evening then give them another nudge, maybe suggest the vouchers instead of meals idea too. Thanks again.

I’m sure the head loves you telling them their job, especially as your children don’t receive FSM.

If a child doesn't bring their lunch box they should be fed. It's hardly going to break the bank for one day; if it is always happening, that is a cause for concern but I bet there aren't many children who haven't forgotten their lunch one day.

Bluebells no one is trying to tell them their job. Do you genuinely think it's unreasonable to point out that low income families will be singled out by this plan? I don't think they've done it deliberately, they've got a million things to sort and this one in my opinion hasn't been thought through properly. And am I only allowed to care if it's my DC who are affected? That's an odd philosophy.

Is this a big thing in schools now? When I was at school the people on fsm were just another friend who had more money to trade in the tuck shop.
Has that all changed? The dc with fsm used to have a ticket in my old school to give to the lunch till lady and everyone knew who they were but no one cared at all. They got given more than the non fsm dc usually had in their purse so they used to spend the voucher on a load of food and share. The ticket was also sold so a voucher may not be as useful as what you're describing they are planning in such circumstances.

Shame if schools have regressed to such a state that dc have to worry about it. I was the dc at senior school who had the newest phone and trainers etc but never occurred to me I couldn't be nice to someone who didn't have the same things.

To add I meant the voucher was often sold at a lower price to non fsm dc than it's worth to gain money for the fsm dc. Not to be used on anything useful. Normally cigarettes for themselves as they couldn't access the cash to get them otherwise! So be wary of the voucher scheme I think.

I agree with you OP, it is an issue and your school should not be making it obvious who gets fsm. My DH got them and had a separate queue and different coloured tickets ( which he had to queue up for at breaktime)
He hated it and was made fun of, there are so many ways this could be done without stigmatising the dc affected.

I think really the lay solution - if you’re worried about these DC not getting a hot meal per day - is for the school to say all KS2 can have the option of school dinners not just packed lunch.

But that can be really unworkable depending on school kitchen & catering set-up.

Our primary school is doing only packed lunch for everyone- KS1 get a school packed lunch provided if they want it and KS2 FSM pupils too. But ‘everyone packed lunch’ doesn’t solve the hot meals issue...