Its just hit me how much commitment driving 30mins (20miles) to school each day is.....

[aintnomountainhighenough]

We have chosen an absolutely fantastic school for our DD. We have taken a lot of time over it and I have worried about various things through the process and have talked through and overcome all my worries. However one angle which I didn't really appreciate until yesterday was the drive to school.

The school is 20 miles from our house and takes about 30 mins (that was at normal school start time and in the rain). I am concerned about the effect this will have on us as a family and would be interested to hear other peoples experience of travelling this distance.

Thanks

b.hell!
how are you managing? I was in bits imagining 2 drop offs/pick ups about 5 mins walk from each other/10 mins difference in start/end times.
will it all be sorted in Sept?

The thing is that it isn't jsut the travellign time - it's gettign there early enough to get a parkign space, collecting all the books and bags, cathing up with other mums, arranging play dates, appointments with teachers, etc. My school is only 5 mins drive, but a school run takes at least half an hour. so that two hours is probably going to stretch to nearly 3 hours.

You say about friends locally, but once they start schools and have to juggle socialising with new friends, it is goign to be very difficult to keep that going. It might also be harder to make new friends, because surely most of the children will be local, and how many days a week do you really want to be doing a pick up and drop off for a playdate with a 30 min round trip. TBH I wouldn't even be keen on my ds going on a playdate that far away.

Children when they start school get very tired out, add all that journey time onto that, and your dd is going to be shattered. Education is important, but so is time outside of school. When are you going to get time to do out of school activities, or 'homework' activities?

sorry to be so negative, but I really wouldn't consider it at all.

If you really think the school is the best for your child could you move house?

If all the schools you select are this sort of distance away - you have 12+ years of doing this!!!
Why on earth would anyone put their kids through this. In addition to the travel, there are also issues around being able to socialise with the other children who attend the school, in school holidays, etc.
All this rubbish about selecting schools annoys me - and it is rubbish. OFSTED reports are not worth the paper they're written on. I've worked in education and seen how certain schools work in order to 'fix' things for the inspectors.

You were planning to take another younger child on a 40 mile round-trip twice a day? The other child would spend two hours (minumum) in the car 5 days a week?

Either move house or choose another school!

We moved house because the differnce between a 2 mile journey from home, in the opposite direction of work, and a 5 min WALK was well worth it in terms of quality of life. If your younger child will also go to this distant school, why not move closer too it? then their freinds will be close, too.

What sort of school is it?

I've always wondered what happens when you're ill or your car is in the garage. Those sort of things.

No, ds is at St J school, and dd2 has a nursery place at Y school, and we were v. v. lucky to get that, as we missed the cutoff dates when we moved. St J school only has a one-form entry nursery, so no chance for latecomers there. We can move dd2 for Reception in 2008, but by then ds will be in Y5 and can walk home by himself, so less of an issue.

Just have to wait and see. But if you know of anyone in the area who has an aupair or nanny with a few extra hours on her hands, do let me know.

My mum did the school run - 30 mins each way - one week on one week off for 8 years. She told me recently she still occasionally looks at a clock when it's gone 3 o'clock and thinks, "Must go!" The school run was 20 years ago

Yes, But Kama, AintNo and the younger DS will have to do two one-hour (minimum)journeys - it isn't just dd, who will, like you, just do the one return trip!

I would think that the younger ds will kick up big time!

I currently take ds to nursery over that kind of distance and he's only there 2.5 hours a day.

DD and I spend 1.5 hours in the car every day just taking ds back and forward.

I have to do what YohoAhoy does and combine the trip into civilisation with shopping/every playgroup under the sun etc. It's not feasible to travel home in between.

But we have no choice -it's that or nothing.

If I had the choice I would be very very careful about travelling this sort of distance daily. The time spent in the car is fine for me, but I do feel for dd (just 2) - she's grown up spending half her life so far on the nursery run. But then she does know a lot of songs now

Come August, Ds will start at primary. There's a school bus which does a door to door service. Every child in the school is entitled to the bus or a taxi service. btu even then ds' school day will be from 8-4:15pm including pick up and drop off - too long for a 4 yo IMO.

I'm guessing that your proposed school is independent and therefore not offering this kind of service?

I would personally only consider this kind of travel arrangement (if our finances ever permitted) for an independent secondary. It's just not fair at primary school stage - far too long a school day.

The plan was that my other child would not spend all that time in the car but due to change in circumstances this is now what could potentially happen. I agree with everyone who has posted this and it isn't going to happen because it is madness.

The school in question is a private school, yes there are other private schools nearer to us but they are not an option because I will not pay to send either of mine to a school which I don't think is suitable.

As regards Ofsteds and choosing schools. Personally I think any type of table produced by this government should be taken with a pinch of salt as they make them show what they want them to show. I am not going to apologise however for wanting, what every parents wants and that is the best education and school for my child.

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I drive my dds 13-30 mins to school each day and they sit in the back colouring/reading/bopping to my loud music. We used to live a 30 min walk away, then a 40 min bus away and now a 13-30 min drive away.
They do miss out on the social side of afterschool but I wouldnt want half an estate knocking on my door anyway.

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Sorry don't see how trying to get the best education you can for your child means they are pushed or depressed! Its a shame that any parent in this country feels they have to do this to get the education they want for their children.

However you are right Cod it is only primary. Originally we had planned to send local primary and then private secondary however we came the conclusion (rightly or wrongly) that putting the money and effort in for primary was worth it because the transition to private secondary would be easier.

Your responses have been very helpful to me, it is sometimes difficult to focus when you want something so badly for your children but know deep down in your heart it won't work.

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sooooooooooo made the same mistake anmhi!!

but d/d is doing so well there which makes it worth while. journeyis a nightmare playdates planned weeks ahead. she wants to go to local school so she can walk ride scooter. i am all set up with work now in close town to shool. even worse as in september d/d as she is young ones in her year only goes until 12.15 so have to do 2 school runs unbelieveable. really dreading it. but as we are forces there is always the chance we will be moved so cannot move and then be told were moving again. next time it will be school nearby big style.

I had a commute of 25 miles to high school and had to be at the minibus at 7am, and home at 6pm. I've never been so exhausted in my life- working full time was a piece of cake compared to that as at least you could come home and have a glass of wine and flop in front of the tv, instead of trudging upstairs to go homework. Do please think again for your dd - she is far too young to commute.

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