Non competitive spelling and reading. I hate it!

[Aloha]

My ds is really good at reading and spelling. it's his chance to shine. I hate the fact that his school don't hold public compulsory reading and spelling competitions in which the parents get to cheer on their children and see who comes last. I mean, competitiveness is so important, don't you think?

sobernow I agree with meandmy that that is crap.

Yr DD's success should be celebrated - just as it would be if she, say, won a countywide art competition or was swimming for her county or similar.

I was obviously taking the piss with this thread. At least I hope it was obvious. I don't think any young child should be pitted against another. Learning to love what you do for the sake of the sheer pleasure of doing it is the absolute ideal IMO. NOthing makes for a happier life. Not 'winning', not 'money', not anything.

I want my ds to LOVE books, not just read hard ones or be the 'best' at reading.
My mum loves to dance and be in the theatre, so her job never feels remotely like work. That's the ideal, I think. I hope that's what I'll teach my kids, if I really teach them anything. Do what makes you feel alive, and do it for the sheer joy of doing it.

That's a lovely thought Aloha.

Children all differ in their abilities.

Love them for their individuality.

Aargh.Huge vomit emoticon.

Totally agree with you 'Sobernow'. Your current experience sounds exactly like what I experienced at school. There were no plaudits whatsoever for the kids who did well in exams - only ever for the sporty ones. My dd's Primary school tries to celebrate all sorts of different achievements ( on a small scale) at regular assemblies and these will allow for those who are not gifted academically (yet) to be acknowledged if they have tried hard/done well for them.For one child to be celebrated does not necessitate for another to be seen to 'lose'. Unfortunatley though there is still sports day where there are definite winners and losers.

Crikey 'Sobernow' you are giving me serious deja-vu. And I'll bet we are not the only ones who suffered like this.

Sobernow. Oh how I know what you mean!

I was thinking of this kind of public performance after seeing the other thread.

Like those spelling competitions they have in the US. Do thye have them here? Hope not.

FWIW as a child whos parents could not always be at the sports day to see, cheer my acheivements, I have rather mixed feelings about the whole thing.

Oh, I knew it was a joke, but I'd just read some of the other thread that wasn't. I don't want my children to be acknowledged as the 'best' (except by me, of course, because they are the most special children in the world to me, whatever they do), but I don't want them to be recognised as the 'worst' either.

But then I am not sporty and was over the moon when my best friend and I trained for weeks to win the three-legged race.

I had similar experiences too at primary school sobernow, with teachers joining in too, winked at by the head. It was a hateful period in my life and you have my utter sympathy. Well done to your dd

what about mediocrity?

my kids are distinctly mediocre at many things, so all the kids get stuff apart from them

no certificates on prize day, no maths cheering, no spelling cheering, no great artists or musical ability, and no great sportsman/woman.

Is it really so widespread that children and parents look down on the clever kids? Sorry going off on a tangent here. Before anyone takes my post the wrong way I'm not implying it it doesn't happen. Interested to hear from people who had probs and those who didn't.

I could read before starting school and had no problems. For most subjects I was near the top and nobody got bullied for being clever far as I know. It wasn't looked down on for doing well. Secondary school was no different. I did grow up in an ultra middle class area though

For me sports day was only one day a year to fail. Every week in junior school we had to stand up and say how many we got right for spelling and arithmatic tests. The type where the teacher shouts out the question and you have a few secs to do the answer.

Now whilst my reading was always years ahead of my age my ability to spell, write nicely or remember times tables wasn't good. Week after week I had to stand up and say 2 out of 10.

Yes it is blueblob. On here - take a look at some of the catty remarks on the G & T threads - and in RL.

I remember being ridiculed by most of the school bus on the way home from school. The reason? My headmaster had told the school that I (and two other students) had go into Oxford University. The girls on the bus considered that this made me a 'snob'. And thus I deserved 'being taken down a peg or two).

And at this point I was in the sixth form, and thse kids were younger than I was!

In my school you learned to kids it if you were clever.

Sporting ability was somehow seen as different

I was called a 'snob' at primary school by a boy in my class because I was clever. I had one teacher (apologies, all you lovely teachers on here who would never do this) who spent all her time telling me and my mother that I wasn't really that clever and would find out at my selective secondary school just how average I was. It rankles to this day. I wasn't boastful at that stage. (And she was wrong....)

I have experienced everything that 'singersgirl', 'martian' and 'sobernow' have said. When I changed from my first primary school (where I was put up a year as I was way ahead on reading) due to a house move, the new school insisted I went back into the right class for my year and the teacher told my mother that I was a nuisance for being so far ahead of the others. Whenever there was reading , I was made to read on my own by the library trolley. You can imagine how easily I found it to make friends!
However, having said all that there is no sign yet that my dd is being bullied for being clever.I think the crucial difference is that she is not the only clever child in the class and is on a table with other children of like ability one of whom is her 'best friend'.

I can also relate to the "its not clever being clever" gang.
Not, fortunately at primary school, as I was in a class which encompassed yrs 3 to 7 inclusive. So when it was time for spelling or maths, each child just worked on whichever level they were on - none of this, you're in yr4 therefore you are on xxx band. No-one seemed bothered what anyone else was doing.
However, at Secondary school (the local comp)- whole different kettle of fish. I very quickly learnt not to put my hand up to answer a question correctly as I would be the subject of ridicule for doing so. - And called posh - still havn't worked out the link there. My year at school was brighter than their usual, 5 of us went to Oxbridge, interestingly the girls suffered more for being bright than the boys. At my school, being bright at Maths (which although sexist - in my particular year was the prerogative of the males) was not seen as uncool.
DH doesn't understand this, as (all boys minor public school) it was a competition in his class to see who could ask the most difficult question of the teacher - with already knowing the answer themselves in case the question was turned back on them.

custardo and soapy

lol, ds had that nailed in reception! he must be super clever!

Bless him, poor old ds aspires to be average. He get the certificates for working hard. He deserves them too.

BK - a politician in the making I would surmise

I used to be really pissed-off at school that we always had to "choose teams" for sport, and inevitably I'd be one of the last three or four to get picked. I used to LONG for this to happen in English, Maths or French so that I could be a captain and I could get my revenge on the football-mad thickies

Still at it, Aloha?

haha! the teachers deny they have streaming i have told them as politely as possible that they are dreaming if they think the kids don't pick up on it!