School Uniform Snobbery?

[CookingDinner]

I have a horrible feeling that the competitiveness between parents about their primary school children has started even before our kids have started school.

I live in an affluent area, but I am not affluent myself. First a couple of parents snorted when I said that I was going to skip buying the checked summer dresses for my DD starting Reception in September, because they will soon need the winter wear and it's a waste of money. Now they are name dropping where they got their school uniforms from. I got mine from ASDA, and it seems they are going out of their way to let people know they got theirs from John Lewis or M&S.

Every supermarket sells school uniforms - who would go to John Lewis? Except to tell people they went to John Lewis. Oh, and apparently the 'stripey ones' are more impressive than the checked. Yawn.

Honestly noone will give a toss by Christmas, they'll all be too busy trying to get dry wipe pens off jumpers. I've just had to buy pe/games kit for my 11 year old for big school in September.. £175 before I've even started on rugby boots or proper uniform 😱

If they are name dropping about where they bought their uniform from then they are vulgar rather than showing how affluent they are.

People who can really afford it and shop wherever they want wouldn't even bother to mention it.

Another vote for buying a cheapo summer check dress from Tesco or Asda now - you won't find them in September when it's the back to school heatwave and your little one is boiling.

All the rest just rise above, and enjoy feeling smug at pick-up on Day 1 when they're all covered in non-washable paint and ketchup stains, and look just as scruffy as each other!

I can honestly say that I cannot tell just by looking which children are wearing John Lewis uniform and which are wearing ASDA. Fwiw, my sons' ASDA and Sainsburys uniforms have worn and washed very well. The 'official' logo jumpers and polo shirts I've shelled out extra on have been crap - shrink like mad when first washed (DS2 has to wear age 7-8 jumper just so it fit after washing, the rest of his clothing is age 3-4 or 4-5 as he's tiny, for example). Seams have gone, colour has faded badly after a few washes. Definitely not worth paying several quid more for. Plus I've noticed that the logo jumpers definitely go 'missing' more often despite having about five name tags sewn in. No one has nicked the ASDA ones! And they look much better by term 2.

Yeah don't get me started on the cost of secondary uniform. I'll have spent hundreds on DS1 after blazers, specialised school kit for every sport, special socks for every feasible occasion... You'd think he was off to Oxford! Save your money for secondary and buy supermarket stuff while you can! It all gets covered in whiteboard pen anyway.

Most of our girls start back in Summer dresses round here.

I made my girls' infant gingham dresses to my design. Where do I fit in the snobbery?
At that point the only place you could buy the colour from was M&S and getting to there was harder (no car) than the fabric shop. I had a lovely time buying the fabric and choosing the design with dd. she was particularly fond of the cat embroidered on the sleeve

I think competitive parenting only happens when you allow yourself to feel competed with...

Summer dresses for September don't make much sense. They'll only be worn for a few weeks and too small by next summer. In reception pretty much only the girls wearing hand me downs from older sisters wear summer dresses in September here (and this is a reasonably affluent area).

Also why is anyone buying uniform now? It's a couple of months til school starts...

@Bananapie because M&S are doing 20% off uniform till next Tuesday

Yep, some secondary schools seem to think they're bloody Hogwarts and kids need 12 cloaks. But in reception it is the parents who get carried away with the cute JL House on the Prairie dresses. Round here many girls do have summer dresses in reception, but enormous ones, to last for summer, too.

PS. I bet the dresses are £3 at ASDA, fill your boots for September, they won't have them then.

Hi - Thank you for the messages.

Our school says that they have to wear blue check or stripe for summer uniform, so they give the option.

I'm sure parents aren't telling me where they bought a nice dress - it's definitely about name dropping. Almost every parent who's mentioned uniform has name-dropped. Or said "I've bought a striped one". That's the kind of area I live in. It's only a state school but it's in an affluent village. The Close that I live on is referred to as the 'low cost housing' in the village magazine!

Mums in the village are pro at boasting about how well off they are in subtle ways. Like my friend who makes me get out of the car, leave the kids in there and walk over to the intercom (cause you can't drive alongside it), to tell her I've arrived at her house for a play date, every time, so she can then talk back to me and open her gate. Even though I'm always on time, and she could just leave it open around the time I'm due.

I've bought all of DS's uniform in either M&S or John Lewis and would readily share that fact with anyone when discussing uniform suppliers but had no clue that anyone would consider this snobbery or name dropping.

Why would anyone buy there? Because they are shops I usually shop in & I'm happy with the quality/price/convenience. I saw no reason to make a special trip to a store I don't usually visit to buy uniform.

I think you are possibly being a bit paranoid.

Chewbecca - We don't have a John Lewis near us - they have ordered them over the internet. Or possibly driven very far to get them, which is very unlikely.

I used to get ds's trousers from M&S. The bottoms frayed away on all of them very quickly. Asda lasted until he grew out of them and were just as smart- the money I've wasted!

I had to get dc's jumpers from JL due to mid year transfers and not being able to buy royal blue v necks anywhere else at the time. I have never seen such poor quality. Not one jumper ( 3dc's x 3 jumpers each) has survived without going at the shoulders, underarms or collar. Not one! I've previously had tesco, sainsburys, m&s and Asda and not had that problem.

Do you have a Waitrose nearby?

I don't live close to a JL either but Waitrose is a mile away so I buy most clothes from there via their free next day click and collect service. Delivery is free too so it really is very convenient.

I would get a summer dress or two. Mine was so so hot in September and I struggled to find a summer dress then. I wouldn't worry about expensive uniform, it gets ruined within 5 mins with paint, mud and board markers. The smug mums will soon be in Asda once the first set gets ruined

I particularly like the style of one of the summer M&S dresses, it's really old school/ traditional with a roomy pocket on each side. My DD likes to carry a tissue. Plus I like the quality and will be passing it on to her little sister. They've always washed well. Oh and the pinafores actually do keep their pleats if you hang them up as soon as they are out of the machine and don't tumble dry! These have worn so well I'll be passing these on too.

There is no better summer school dress than the Asda one, with the full swirly whirly skirt.

My aim in buying school uniform is to have a 'oh well, never mind' reaction when it gets ruined. So this week dd2 has been written on twice with whiteboard pen (once on her back, so it really wasn't her fault), and since it was a £3 dress passed down from her sister, I was able to say "never mind, I'll try stain remover but no worries if it doesn't come out.".

You don't want to be in the position of caring when it gets ruined, basically. My price point for that is about £5 - though even better when it's a 50p polo shirt from the secondhand stall. Yours may differ, but identify it and then stick to it. At least for KS1, ime clothes are ruined much less in KS2.

I'd def get a summer dress for Sept. DD started school in 2014 and it was boiling for all of Sept and lots of Oct.
It was worth the £5 for 2 dresses. I bought 5-6 and they were fine for the other end of the year.

I bought all M&S but topped up with Tesco in Feb half term after a growth spurt- turned out the navy pinafores fit better, wash better, fade less and don't need ironing. Oh and they are £5. So I've switched completely now.

Oh and I bought a cheap pair of fake patent leather Mary Janes from Wynsors for £9 three weeks ago and they've been great.

After the first year of school, you stop giving a shit about uniform, seriously.

How can it be name dropping and snobbery amongst them all if they all shop there?

And buying generic uniform from M&S isn't wildly snobby. It's M&S!

I agree, unnecessary to buy summer dresses for September, but they can afford it, they are over excited, so what.

People do have and spend more money than others without looking down on them you know.

I am about to pass on a load of our no longer needed uniform to friends who have very little money indeed. They wouldn't think you were snobby because you buy new from Asda while they are pleased with second hand, any more than you would (I assume) look down on them for not being able to afford new uniform.