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Original poster

New memeber needing advice on DD1 reception reading.

43 replies

Helplease · 04/01/2007 10:53

Ok, I have got myself into a right pickle with my daughters reading at school.
She started in September (reception) and has completed Phonics and blended letters, and did very well.
Now I have only been told recently that DD is very behind on her 45 word reading. I was not told I should do them at home and at the time they tested her (start of Dec) she could only do 4.
I have done them almost every night now, and she is able to read about 12-15 off the top of her head, but she is still struggling, I could do a word 100 times and she still wont know it.
Im getting so stressed, other mum's say their child can do 42/45 words etc and others have said they do them at school so well they do not need to do them at home really.
What SHOULD be average for my daughter to be picking up? I feel like such a useless mother right now.
I read the school books (x2) every night, plus she has a homework activity to do at the weekend plus her words, (personally I think this is way too much for her age) its just getting on top of me tbh...and DD goes to her fathers at weekends so I get very stretched for time even though i am a SAHM.
HELP!

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HuwEdwards · 04/01/2007 10:56

Dear god, what awful pressure to put your DD under at such a young age! Am astounded quite frankly.

My DD is in Yr 1 and in Reception I was never even made aware of the words she should know - and the emphasis was very much on working at her own pace.

I was reading her book with her each night (and wasnt asked to do this until after October half-term - and nothing else.

Is this a private school?

littlemissbossy · 04/01/2007 10:59

My advice would be RELAX! she's only 4! 2x books each night in reception is way too much IMO. Also, try not to compare her to others - hard I know - but it's not a competition. Don't worry, she's still very young for reading

hewlettsdaughter · 04/01/2007 11:01

Hi, what is 45 word reading?

She's only reception age. I'm sure you know, kids develop at different rates - you really need to try and not get stressed about it.

At this stage learning should be fun, not focussed on achievement. If you are stressed about things you might pass that on to your daughter.

I don't think we did any homework with our ds at this age. Just read with him.

HuwEdwards · 04/01/2007 11:01

Helplease, when I was twittering about your daughter being under pressure it was a criticism of the school not you - think you are being put under too much pressure too as a matter of fact..

Saturn74 · 04/01/2007 11:02

I would say that you need to be very careful about how you handle this, as if your daughter feels pressurised about reading it could put her off it entirely.
She is very young.
I would read to her and with her a lot.
I'm shocked that a school would refer to a reception child as being 'very behind'.

sunnysideup · 04/01/2007 11:04

What awful terminology they used - 'very behind'...after ONE TERM AT SCHOOL, at four years old? What????

I say completely ignore them and do not let them pressure you, and certainly do not let one WHIFF off pressure be transferred to your dd. What a certain way to put her off learning, I would think!

She is barely school age and she is learning as fast as she can. You are doing it with her, so is the school, end of story.

She is not 'behind' she is perfectly where she can and should be at this time.

I bet if you spoke to every single parent in that year, you would find most are in a similar position to you. Some say their kids can do 40-odd because they are proud, and some because they are lying!

Forget it. It's not important, so long as she is looking at the words, she will get there.

How is the school's approach other than this? It sounds very over the top.

Cappuccino · 04/01/2007 11:04

I get very stressed about dd's reading

and dh always says he was kept back a year for being crap at it in Primary

then he jumped two years cos he just got it

don't worry about it

(says she, who caused a screaming row this morning cos dd wouldn't read her book )

but don't do as I say, do as I do

slalomsuki · 04/01/2007 11:05

I would relax

DS1 raced through phonics and belnding but took until three quarters of the way through reception to be able to read. IT just clicks in place and she will be off.
I worried and we spent ages before hand with going over words with common sounds lit it, bit, sit etc but it didn't make any difference it just clicked when it was ready and now in year 1 I cannot stop him reading at all

coppertop · 04/01/2007 11:06

I agree that it sounds like an awful lot of work for a 4yr-old. At this stage of Reception ds1 only had one book every week or two and a lot of the class were still taking home books with no words in them. Later in the year the class had small spelling tests but there was no pressure whatsoever.

Enid · 04/01/2007 11:09

I think you must be talking about the cvc reception words - they are supposed to know these BY THE END OF RECEPTION not the end of the first term

please try not to worry and don'tpressure your dd, you will put her off for life

(dd1 didnt know her cvc words until year 1 btw)

Lucycat · 04/01/2007 11:14

I'd just echo everybody else - please relax, it's far more important that your dd is happy at school than can read, especially at this VERY early stage of Reception!

My dd, although very good verbally was a bit slower to read than some, then in the first term in year 1 she just 'got it' and is voracious now.

Oh and don't listen to the parents of other children - they all boast about their little dahlings

Welcome to mn!

Cappuccino · 04/01/2007 11:16

I know!

I'll start a 'reluctant readers' thread

this comes up again and again

here it is

Original poster
Helplease · 04/01/2007 11:17

Oh wow, you guys, Im sat here in tears cos of the total and utter relief...
I truely thought I was doing something wrong, or she was doing soemthing wrong.
They didn't say "very behind" but they wrote in her reading book that she can only "4/45 words, please make sure I do her words regularly " and it was implied to me when talking to her teacher she was behind, even though they didn'tsay that particular word.
We all read loads, and so this had come as a total shock, and I thnk I have upset my DD cos I have put too much pressure on her, purely because I was so stressed, I fear I may have hindered her now!
What is usual? Im new to the school stuff so I have no bearing on what should be expected.
Like I said she has a reading book a library book her words AND a home activity to do weekly. What can i do about all this?

OP posts:
Lucycat · 04/01/2007 11:21

Schools are such bullies aren't they?

Read the library completely to your dd, show her how fun it is.
Share the reading of the school book, get her to pick a few words out or to try and guess what is happening next, ask if you can keep it for a few more days if you want to read it again - my dd loved repetition of books!

Just concentrate on the words - they don't test them do they?

Lucycat · 04/01/2007 11:22

oops sorry - library book not the whole library!!

Enid · 04/01/2007 11:23

agree

read the library book to her - make it a nice thing

set a timer for 10 mins and spend that time on the reading book. If you havent finished it after 10 mins ask for it back the next day.

Ignore the words. They will come. Or if you cannot bear to, buy the magnetic fridge versions and put them on the fridge (thanks cod!) - this helps.

hewlettsdaughter · 04/01/2007 11:23

Only thing I can think is try and talk to the school - work out what is expected. Do you really have to do lots of word work and homework every week, or do they just give it out for those that want to?

I am also interested in whether this is a state or private school.

Original poster
Helplease · 04/01/2007 11:24

Well thats the thing, they obviously test the words cos my friends child had "well done you read 42/45 words today" with a smiley face in his book, done the same day as my dd.

Its not a private school BTW just a normal average primary.

OP posts:
Lucycat · 04/01/2007 11:24

oh yeh - don't just concentrate on the words -

missingmywine · 04/01/2007 11:25

Helpplease - what age is your daughter? Reception can mean a 4.1 yr old being next to a 5 yr old which at this age is very different. My DD was 4.1 in reception and learnt her words as a very slow rate, now in yr one her reading is level with all her peers despite being the youngest in the year. Please do not worry - she has many years ahead and too much pressure on her now may put her off. She's v lucky that you a) are concerned and b) take the time to support - just enjoy the 1 to 1 time together.

LIZS · 04/01/2007 11:27

The whole thing is a nonsense. I bet she is in no way unusual in the class and other mums exaggerate (aka lie, get used to that it will happen all the way through just as they did when their kids were babies !). The school are talking about the 45 "sight" words I suspect to be recognised out of context by the end of the Reception year. You can buy them in fridge magnets style from Wilkinsons and online and then you can play games , make silly sentences and stories up with them, find words starting with the same sound and so on. She has until the end of the year to do this so on 2 or 3 a week she'll get there and even then it is not a pass or fail. Please be reassured that she is doing fine,as are you

Lucycat · 04/01/2007 11:28

At the end of the terms my dd was checked to see how many of their 'words' they knew

In Oct of Reception - she knew 20/26 letter sounds.

By the beginning of Feb she suddenly knew 25/45 words

March - 31/45
beginning of June 45/45

Hope that helps - I didn't remember that btw I looked in her old reading book!

Now she's in Year 2 and reads Secret Seven!

Original poster
Helplease · 04/01/2007 11:28

LOL thanks everyone you are all so kind, and I feel so so relieved.

DD turned 5 a week ago. She is not slow in any way, very forward, confident, but this reading thing has been so stressful, I cant beleive I let this get to me, I feel so silly.

OP posts:
coppertop · 04/01/2007 11:29

At ds1's school they recommend just 10mins a night of reading/homework in Reception.

I agree that the range of ages in a Reception class can also make a difference. When ds1 finished Reception he was only a couple of months older than some of his classmates had been when they started Reception.

Bozza · 04/01/2007 11:29

There is a list of 45 words that the govt says all children should know by the end of reception. Which, btw is miles off anyway. They are regularly used words like - the, a, and and some more difficult ones. DS would certainly not have know many at that stage, but now a year later (he is Y1) I think he would definitely know all of them and most of the KS1 ones as well which the govt doesn't think he should be able to do until next year. He suddenly "got" reading. Then he suddenly "got" numbers - currently he is obsessed with counting to big numbers all the time and doing basic sums. Can get irritating. Just before Christmas he "got" writing and started producing trillions of Christmas cards with little messages in like "don't forget to hook your stockins by the fireplase".