Year 5 Boy - disastrous parents evening - Help!

[fleurdelacourt]

So ds is 10 and ALL the parents evenings from Nursery - year 4 went really well. Bright boy, perfectionist traits which he needs to overcome but natural mathematician, popular, happy etc.

And then, with no prior warning, the year 5 parents evening was a shocker. He hands no homework in, he is very moody and often believes he can't do the work, he panics under pressure. The maths teacher (having been v complimentary earlier in the year) basically suggested that he might struggle to pass any entrance exams.

While I remain appalled at the way the school have communicated this, I need to try and deal with it now. Without scaring ds even further.

Anyone got any tips for building confidence? I'm thinking a small amount of mental maths every day? Anything else I could do?

He does do his homework when it comes home so clearly I need to make sure it always comes home and is always handed in.

Fleur if I had to do this again I would use Galore Park ISEB 11+ and possibly 13+ practice exercises in eng and mth, possibly in other subjects too. History is brilliant! I use them in my own classes now. Letts maths Rev is good too. These books are great because they have answer books so you and he can really be sure you are right.

All those years ago they were wrong about my son and you and your son will show them they are wrong about your ds too. As I said this brought back so many memories for me. I do understand the shock you feel. I too was bewildered. Good Luck.

Ps I agree with shipwrecked about school size

So nice to be able to discuss this with other people - think dh going slightly mad with all my analysis....

ds has, in fact, been to the smaller school on an open day. It's 3 form entry so a reasonable pool of boys.

the larger school is very impressive - dh and I have seen it. I'm just concerned that if we go round and ds loves it and doesn't get in that we would have a huge problem on our hands. I was thinking of entering him for the exam and taking him for a look around if he gets in.

If there were any way to get him out of his current school now, I would. Academically and pastorally it's not working for him - albeit that he has a lovely (if small) friendship group.

I am going to see the maths teacher in the new term - I need feedback from her to know where he and I should be focusing. I also need to make sure that ds feels on top of school work as it is given out - and, more importantly that he feels loved and valued within the family unit.

He's such a sweet boy really - just need to encourage him to stay positive and believe in himself....

If they say low processing instead of dyslexia it means your child gets no funding, no statement, and no requirement for the school to help (although his did after I made sure they would!) I had years of battles and at one point was told by an ed psych that he had an IQ of 80!!! Eventually after many battles at age 16 starting college I got another ed psych report that did label him as dyspraxic with dyslexic tendancies which can go with him to uni. In the interim I did have one that said he needed all he help that a dyslexic needs but that he wasn't a typical dyslexic. This report gave us no way to get the help he needed and was done by a young ed psych, I pointed this anomaly out to her and she re did it looking for dyspraixia, (I had been told I had this) she did that for us.