Cloud I don't want to single you out but just to reply to what you said and say IMHO I am sure having parents who are educated makes a difference to kids but there is just so much more to it. There is genetics which means some children will be more inclined to certain things, good at certain things etc. It's not just as simple as saying if we do the same thing for all kids we will get the same result.
IMHO, I think tailored teaching and parenting works well as kids are all different and respond to different stimulus.
What is certain for those parents whose kids do not do well with homework (or school, or reading, writing etc) is that homework is not always beneficial.
When you say I guess the people who don't like homework are quite happy there are a research saying that homework is useless, and then can just put their mind on the rest.
Personally, I cannot speak for others of course, I am pleased that what we find so very hard to do (homework) may not be essential or important, because if it were that would be even sadder for my dyslexic dd. It is not to do with not liking homework, I am very happy for others to do it, I just feel for many kids it is unhelpful and actually more than that quite damaging. And personally as a parent I would like to see more research into what is good for kids, especially those, like my dd, who do not find school at all easy.
Those parents and children who find writing, reading, maths, sitting still, concentrating, working hard, etc easy - will almost all find home work easier. That is great for them, but just because it is so for them, it is not for us. And wishing doesn't make it so.
If the research said homework was vital, I would be very sad. BUT I cannot control the results of empirical research, what saddens me,is that there does not seem to be a lot of empirical research on homework and yet homework is still standard.
By empirical research I mean they would need to do trials in some classes, where some classes or children got homework and some did not, this would be done randomly, in a controlled way, and then the researchers would see over a period of time what, if any, difference that made.
Does anyone know of any ongoing studies like this?
This is standard for medical research, I was part of a pre-eclampsia study. I took pills not knowing if they were the real thing or if they were a placebo. They measured my results. It was all very safe and I was part of something that hopefully added to medical knowledge about pre-eclampsia. My dd is part of a school study, which is great and I am so pleased that this is going on. But it is not about homework.
But Cloud I am not disputing that homework for you and your family may be a positive experience and beneficial. I am in way doubting that for some parents and kids homework is not the kind of issue it is for us. 
Thanks Nooka, throckenholt, and all, for your comments. Thank you all teachers who have contributed your thoughts.
Perhaps my hope in posting on this theme is to:
get opinions from other, so thank you all I really do appreciate it.
get advice how to help my dd from others who have been there done that
explain the problems some experience are not laziness or lack of parental will to help children
Keep your wonderful views coming.